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Mental, emotional, physical, financial
So much suffering in the world today
People experiencing theirs in various forms
Lack of job or insufficient pay
Cancer, AIDS, depression, diabetes, ******...name it
Cost of basic needs is becoming unbearable
Lost of loved ones
Lost of cherished relationships, betrayal
Lot of people are using drugs to numb the pain
No matter how long the night is...
Morning will surely appear
Darkness will always bow to light
There is abundant light within, let it out!
It's just too many things to worry about of late...
might as well call me josephine
it hurts to love but it never hurts to leave
i'll be twice as good drowning in the coldest sea
go find your love and call me, pretty

some days i dream i'd just fall into the beast's mouth, i
feel so afraid of the rain that's heading south in a couple days
it might wash away the warmness of your voice
when i would cry from the motel into your phone

and you were there when i realized what happiness was
and now it's sadness coupled by what a slow month does to you
do you hold on to my ghost now too?
i've never felt lower

we spot the same photo in the glass
a soft reminder that bad things will always pass
away from what it had become
i'm down on all fours just begging for a touch of

time, however short it is and
space, how little there is of it
i'm always spinning in the dizziness of the world but
now without the presence of a cotton candy girl

and you were there when i realized what happiness was
and now it's sadness coupled by what a slow month does to you
do you hold on to my ghost now too?
i've never felt lower

nothing will ever make sense
unless you take my amends
oh, just gun me down

and when you lock the door
i sink into the floor
oh just pull on me and take me out

and you were there when i realized what happiness was
and now it's sadness coupled by what a slow month does to you
do you hold on to my ghost now too?
i've never felt lower

and you were there when i realized what happiness was
and now it's sadness coupled by what a slow month does to you
do you hold on to my ghost now too?
i've never felt lower
this accidentally became a song
☾☽
I was red,
I was ******,
fear and desperation

drove me to self hatred
and I hid from the world
and loathed the high expectations

"You should be perfect
like the stars in the sky
not lost and broken

like a cracking china doll
you should be gold
and shining

so paint over the red
replace it with white
the same pale as a pill

a bottle filled to the brim
with many a fix
but once you're fixed

It's hard to learn
how to feel again
cause if you're perfect like the stars

why feel anything anymore?
☾☽
e m p t y
Artem 3h
Fate is cruel to us and unfair,
But the truth in the words that I'll say:

Only way to be noticed -
Is to completely ignore,
Only way to be loved -
Is don't want to love anymore.

If you want a girl of your dreams to never love you

Tell her,
That she's the point of your pointless life,
and without her you feel like dead inside

Confess,
That you would like embrace her all the time,
That for her you'll burn in any fire,
That without her you'd rather die

And whisper:
«i'll never let you fall
For you i'll give my all,
i'll never break your heart
Let's kiss without any sound

i don't care for any scar,
i love you as you are
and love stronger than ever.
Can we be together… forever? »

Say so, and you will lose your girl.
Don't even try to understand,
But if you wanna hold her hand
You not destined to be good friend
Just break girl's heart and start depart,
Break apart, without a doubt.

Destroy girls inmost hope and dream
And make her cry and wanna scream.
This way is very strange, i know
You need to tear her heart and throw
away, if you want to feeling love.

But as i said, tricky fate is cruel and unfair,
And when you make she love you this way
You'll no longer need your beloved,
You'll no longer need to be loved.
Poem is inspired by song Good Charlotte - Break apart her heart.
And by my life.
Who is this girl I see below me who holds this far off stare
She holds no concern for me as I dance through the air

I live in a world of colors far away from pain
I'm not the girl that is constantly trapped inside her own brain

I wander far away in floating fields of cotton
The agony and my blade are long ago forgotten

There is a tugging at my core and I know it's almost time
Her cries pull me back and into her skin I climb.
Depression is like a having a sweater on, yet still feeling chilled to the bone.
It's like having a raincoat on, but water still manages to slide down your goosebumped back.

Depression is putting on a wet bathing suit.
It's that cold clammy feeling that makes your every hair stand on end.

Depression is driving down a road in thick fog never knowing when the road curves, so you drive like ever yard could send you careening off into the endless abyss.

When you climb out of the pit of melancholy that is depression, you think how could I ever been that sad, yet there is always that gnawing in your mind that you could be right back in there tomorrow.
Taking a deep breath is hard when your neck is being squished. And your eyes are wet, painted with tears.
I hate holding them back. The “crying breath” I have is uneven. ‘I’m just sniffling!’ type of sniffles, as if there’s not snot running up and down my nostrils.
I get in a steaming hot shower; not wanting to bathe, but wanting to escape. Watching beads of water hit my raised skin calms my heartbeat, but also gives me a sense of sadness. When you’re sad, you start to notice little things like the pattern of your breath, the serious line spread upon your lips when someone tells a joke in hopes of cheering you up, the gulps you take, and your milky, glazed eyes staring blankly back at you in the mirror you haven’t cleaned in weeks because you didn’t have enough energy to walk up and down the stairs to get the cleaner and to put it back. You start to pretend. You pretend to love, and to hate. You hate the world and everyone so much, but only because you are hurting and you don’t want to hurt others by letting them in, or them to hurt you too.

Nonetheless, you hurt anyway.
draft
The thoughts of suicide riddle my brain,
They're around all corners of every word I say.
Every thought I think or memory I look back,
The symbiote of suicide leaks out of every *****.

Writing and romanticising all my bad habits isn't smart,
But it's the sacrifice I make to make sacrificial art.
There's beauty in trapping myself in a box of sadness and doubt,
Walls made of paper; so maybe I can write myself out.

As unhealthy and sordid as it may be,
I find self-solitary to bring out the best in me.
As unstable and morbid as it may seem,
I find thoughts of suicide to bring out the best in me.
Sometimes I wonder
Since I'm not loved or cared for
why don't I just die?
sigh
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