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Jan 2023 · 398
Birthdays
stopdoopy Jan 2023
Nov. 5

I was upset that only internet friends wished me happy birthday

Dec. 4

You didn’t even make it to yours
I didn’t know you very well. I remember japanese class, having a crush on you, the *** water bottle, the pizza **** tattoo. I didn’t know you well but **** if i don’t remember you.
Jul 2021 · 406
Uncureable
stopdoopy Jul 2021
And it's funny,
As I stand here
Bent over this sink
With tears streaking
All down my face
And my ribs are so sore
As I ***** some more,
That I think of you
You're disgusting, my dear.
Apr 2021 · 313
Falling
stopdoopy Apr 2021
Warm little kisses
To freezing finger tips
Are like burns to me

Why don't You run
Why are You here
What do You want


They do their job perfectly
Thawing out this heart
Making me pliant


What do You need
What is It
What am I to you

Unable to do anything
Limp for your hands
Aching for a touch

Would You break my heart too?
Mar 2021 · 170
Awkward
stopdoopy Mar 2021
I'm here for you
I'm gay for you
if you want it to stop
well baby it's too late
you had a chance to tell me I'd never be a top
but instead you accelerated my heartrate
Dedicated to all my gay overwatch friends who liked this poem
Nov 2020 · 373
Aviary Dive
stopdoopy Nov 2020
You think
I am a hen
In god's house

There for the plucking

Oh honey
How foolish you are

To think it'd be so easy
To get close to me

My feathers are gold and ivory
And my beak deadly

Moving with pigeon toes
You stumble and trip

You thought this dance
Would be swift

But this is ballet
And you are not my Siegfried
Ballet is wild y'all, mad respect to anyone who does it
Sep 2020 · 452
Our Dirty Secret
stopdoopy Sep 2020
How it must feel
To be a traitor
To everyone who's loved you

Does he know what we did?
Would he still love you?

Call me disgusting
A  horrible person
Manipulative even

I hope he learns
And that he leaves
So you are alone

And I hope you know my pain
Because you deserve it.
Aug 2020 · 283
Slowly But Surely
stopdoopy Aug 2020
I'm making love to myself.

In ways you never could,
Never would,
And bringing pleasure.

I haven't hit the peak yet,
But you never got me there either;

And at least this way
I'm going somewhere.
yeet
May 2020 · 1.4k
Daydreaming In A Field
stopdoopy May 2020
I'd love nothing more
Than to lay my head
On thy tender breast
And dream of sweet
Chaste kisses and
Melodies as pure
As the love I have
For you my dearest one
Mar 2020 · 141
I'm Sleeping, You're Crying
stopdoopy Mar 2020
I'm an old man
I've seen my fair share
And you've got no plan
Going without a care

You thought you could take me for a spin
Dip your toes in the pool
But you could never win
And it's you who's the fool

You blew your chance
Having walked away
Go have a dance
You don't get my pay

All you do is lie
And I'm going to sleep
Go have a cry
I won't watch you weep
Feb 2020 · 542
No More Batteries
stopdoopy Feb 2020
Now a days
I just feel
So drained  

         The moment fell open
         The fasteners broke
         And I was the fool
         Who tried to keep them inside

Broken mirrors
Blood and tears
And I see myself lying here

         Alone in life
         Alone in death
         Body all that's left

The Brain is Dangerous
Don't Listen To Us
We're Nothing But Dust
Feb 2020 · 180
The Waves Are Crashing
stopdoopy Feb 2020
soft tears cresting in eyes

oh how they've hurt you so

dearest one, let this pass

in pain, fury, the deepest swells of sadness

let them wash over you again and again

until you are calmed

smoothed out until new

you will prove victorious

and they will meet their end
Dec 2019 · 345
Out of This Galaxy
stopdoopy Dec 2019
I feel like a projection
From a distant planet
Seeing everything from afar

I'm here
I'm seen
I'm heard

But I'm not felt

And I want to feel

As much as this life can give me
So even though right now I'm far away
Maybe I'll get there, someday
Dec 2019 · 171
Initial Letters
stopdoopy Dec 2019
C.E.W,

How long it's been
since you've said your goodbyes

I think of you still
even though I don't wish to

I know
you don't regret it

And I know
I always will, even if just a little

Because despite myself
I was truly, utterly devoted to you

How strange it is
To have been cut out of your life

By your own hands
So final, and definite your judgement

But despite these feelings
I still want you to be buried beneath the snow this winter

Even though I loved you
You've done me wrong, and that I can't forgive

Goodbye,
E.L.C
Nov 2019 · 274
Androgyne
stopdoopy Nov 2019
Two
Halves
Never one whole

Left
Right
But why not both?

Dividing me
Into "opposing" categories
But you can't have one without the other

Neither male
Or female
Simply both
happy birthday to me *****
Oct 2019 · 295
Death
stopdoopy Oct 2019
It'll creep into your mind
sits in the back and festers
until you acknowledge it
and it makes you sick
having plagued humanity for centuries

It doesn't matter you're happy
a miserable wretch
or a beloved spouse

The dark has no preference
the shadow consumes you sooner than you think
gently swaddled in the shroud of time
something only man knows and keeps
until the end.
Happy Halloween
Oct 2019 · 424
"Pumpkin"
stopdoopy Oct 2019
Rip me apart
and cart me off
to somewhere unknown

Cut through the top
plunge fingers deep
disgusting, wet, and slick

Rip out the innards
make hollow
for your own pleasure

Unmoving
it sits and waits
for the rest to come

The carving
the face always
comes out ugly

At last
light the fire
and watch it glow

In the bright flames
of a dark night
they'll be left there

Until they're rotting
scrape up the remains
and dump the body
a Halloween inspired poem!

is it really a pumpkin?
Sep 2019 · 738
My Beloved Venus
stopdoopy Sep 2019
so gentle and understanding

pining silently, too friendly looks

brushes, only an artist would use

our union under the moon

what should've been, blooming for you

even as I depart, I leave you keeper of my heart

watch over me well, my tender one
im in a sad gay mood for no reason, yeehaw
Sep 2019 · 612
Thoractomy
stopdoopy Sep 2019
so much to give
but so closed off

a glass
filled to the brim
waiting to spill

others take tentative sips
or pour it out completely

I just want to be savored
drank slowly over time
enjoyed through all seasons

while my heart may be punctured
oozing out love to anyone who looks
my bones are hard and sharp
waiting to poke through this flesh
and stab if need be

to want to love
so freely
to want to receive
the same

you'd think it'd be easier
to crack open this ribcage
Aug 2019 · 1.2k
Lauralane
stopdoopy Aug 2019
A love that never was

Oh but I felt it
As we left it behind
getting cut
on the raw edges
not yet worn by time
or effort

Just a fresh feeling
I really did love her
stopdoopy Aug 2019
Now I see it's you not me
Don't say your same old lies
I'm tired of hearing it all the time

I never wanted this.
Thought that it was always going to last
But now it's failing fast

Wasting my life
It's too much for me to forgive
Knowing how much you hid

Who needs the night
Sick of the fight
You can never find me

Memories swayed
Had I stayed
I wonder how things would've changed

Now that you see what I did
All that's come undone
I just had to run

Not that it was gonna last
I'd've never said goodbye
But all I ever did was cry

Never say I don't care
You were never there
I felt so uncomfortable
Aug 2019 · 419
Inscribed
stopdoopy Aug 2019
You make me want to write poetry,
but I fear I lack the talent to eloquently
put together the words,
to tell you how wonderful you are;
even in the most mundane of moments.
Jul 2019 · 319
Are Those Eyes?
stopdoopy Jul 2019
lately things have been getting blurry
thoughts
feelings
words
meanings
and I feel like crying
so lost inside my own head
what do I want
who am I
what should I do
my vision is going
and I'm scared
old mood, old issue- I got glasses!
Jul 2019 · 1.0k
Stay Away From Me
stopdoopy Jul 2019
if only you knew how dangerous I was,
a poisonous cloud infecting everything;
would you still weep for me then?
tears soft
and hands rough
but these touches gentle

they warn you
how I cut-
thorns on a rose,
the tighter you grasp
the more it hurts;
so drop me

except,
you always return.
am I that alluring?
worth all this pain?
if you think so
then stay....
Jul 2019 · 645
Past Lives
stopdoopy Jul 2019
Do you feel it?
As if we're drawn together,
like soulmates.
Maybe you do,
I wont ever know,
but I feel it always ends the same.
Maybe we're not meant to be together.
Perhaps it's always been this one sided...
despite the words you've said,
no matter how we lived.
God and priest,
maiden and servant,
in a war somewhere,
friends.
I don't think we've ever ended up together,
isn't that sad, my dear, Aphrodite?
I suppose it's for the best, darling.
Had to get a last poem in before pride month is over! Hope y'all had a great one <3
Jun 2019 · 288
Fog
stopdoopy Jun 2019
Fog
Hazy
Hard
to
see
through

.

Clouding
your
vision

.

Unable
to
think
through

.
­
A
gas
that
if
left
on

,


can
and
will
burn
everything
down

.
­
All
it
takes
is
a
spark

,

and
your
life
is
gone

.
life death spark burn gas think vision hazy
Jun 2019 · 694
This Father Is Very Angry
stopdoopy Jun 2019
Pretty
Little girls
Run home
Into my arms

Crying
About
The man
They met tonight

He
Was always
A monster
Just hidden inside

They
Had bled
Blue and Red
Having Known him

If
I could
I would
**** for them

I
Would take
It all
For those girls

My
Sweet, funny
Precious friends
Deserved much more

But
All I
Can do
Is be here

Listen
To how
They weep
And feel disgust

Their
Bodies no
Longer theirs
But now spectacles

"If
It really
Happened" someone
Mocks them cruelly

"It's
No big
Deal" another
Sneers so violently

It
Happened
Whether they think
So or not

And
I am
Here for you
My dear sisters
May 2019 · 449
The Trial
stopdoopy May 2019
Clerks (and the)
"Felon"
(and) A Serious Man

12 Angry Men (sit)
"A Few Good Men"
(in the) City Of Men

The Fugitive (seems)
"Fearless"
(stands with a) Smile

"Scent Of A Woman"
Presto (he says)
(and there would be no) Law Abiding Citizen

"The Gods Must Be Crazy"
(to let) Someone Like Him
Getaway (free)

The Sting (is that)
"Cell 211"
(remains) Empty
The sequel to "The Crime". Once again made from movie titles.

They are definitely gross and specific poems, a comment on society.
May 2019 · 397
The Crime
stopdoopy May 2019
"It Comes At Night"
(Desire) First renewed
Under the silver light (of the moon)

"A Quiet Place"
(A) Fatal Attraction
There will be blood (he hopes)

Venom (drips from his tongue)
(as he forces open her) Jaws
******

(the) Heat
"Let Him Have It"
Primal Fear (is all she knows)

"The Usual Suspects"
Goodfellas (they claim)
(making her play) The Game
A poem made from movie titles
May 2019 · 423
do you
stopdoopy May 2019
I like yellow
I like yellow because like me
I like yellow because like me it's loud
I like yellow because like me it's loud, it's obnoxious
I like yellow because like me it's loud, it's obnoxious, it's bright
I like yellow because like me it's loud, it's obnoxious
I like yellow because like me it's loud
I like yellow because it's like me
I like yellow
And I like me
hmmmm idk how I feel about this

also nervous AF for an interview for a job I don't even want

but I truly love yellow (and myself) so that's life
May 2019 · 233
Painting
stopdoopy May 2019
You make me feel so blue.

Deep as the oceans.

The Aphotic Zone of the heart.

Even so, I would not change my feelings.

For you also light up my life.

Transforming me into a beautiful sunrise after midnight.
Apr 2019 · 322
Good Company
stopdoopy Apr 2019
How do I convey how much I appreciate you?
Always by my side and ruthless
To me
Honest and kind
Tell me my folly
My dear with those strong words and determined eyes
I am in your debt for the company you have bestowed upon me
Cait-Cait is the greatest friend one could ask for, and is a treasure.

Also unrelated but "In Hell I'll Be In Good Company" by The Dead South is a bop.
Mar 2019 · 561
Quick Draw
stopdoopy Mar 2019
You're not welcome here

There may be posters
on the outside of the building
with your face on them sayin
"Wanted"
but that ain't an invitation

Pushing past the swinging twins
strutting in, without a care
like you've done nothing,
as if everyone in the room
doesn't want to **** ya

For all the things you've done
they wouldn't need the pay
it'd be a service to mankind,
plenty of folks are glad to put a bullet in yer head

But Darlin'
ya always did have a sweet mouth
I'd love to see you talk your way outta this one

And as soon as you go to speak
I can see it plain as day

BANG
Hot anger; what a feeling.
Mar 2019 · 566
I CANT SWIM
stopdoopy Mar 2019
You make me go back to the beach
The light breeze your caress
Sun as warm as your smile
Water icy like your words

And I try to float in this sea you made
Tumultuous, and salty as your are
But I'm choking down lungful's
Crying for help

And you let me drown
And it's almost calm down here
On the bottom where I can't breathe
Cause at least I'm out
Of the riptide's reach
"She's a riptide queen and she's super mean"
Mar 2019 · 611
I've Been Waiting
stopdoopy Mar 2019
Little beads,

Jaded by time.

Bouncing.

Roll on the floor.

The end is here.

Fire Blooming in lungs,

Burning out what once was,

Creating fertile ground for the new.

Flowers weaving through veins,

Bursting through the heart.

Badum Badum Badum.

Excavating the chest,

Tearing through skin.

You see me there,

Rotting on a cracked floor,

Moss seeping through;

Long forgotten.

A smile on my face,

"Thank you for coming"
inspired by some fire ecology and, as always, personal feelings.
Mar 2019 · 549
Sunbathing At Dawn
stopdoopy Mar 2019
out
of the    dark
further,          further
pushing                on still
through         the street
in a       patch
just to  see you
and meet
the glorious sun
soak in the warmth
as the first light of day
drifts over us and I start to think
maybe this is home, here with you
in those shining pale rays, just us
and the problems of the world
seem so distant when we
can just sit here, looking
up at the sky, alone,
together, enjoying
ourselves and so
utterly at peace
and that    is a life
that I          think I
could get                 used to
Feb 2019 · 443
I want
stopdoopy Feb 2019
to leave little stains on your cheeks with my lipstick

to see how good you look marked up

your perfume upon my breath

so everyone knows who I'm with

tight hugs

slow dances

nights in autumn

cuddled up

just me and you angel

having a good time
Feb 2019 · 515
"Her Beauty Could Cut"
stopdoopy Feb 2019
And I'll gladly sit there
in that tacky chair
and bleed out for an eternity

To watch that woman
laugh freely and smile
open and relaxed

All night
and then I'd remember
I'm hers, and she's mine

And I'm so lucky
that she's soft and gentle with me
for surely I'd die in that seat otherwise
Dedicated to everyone, you're all so beautiful.
Feb 2019 · 290
You
stopdoopy Feb 2019
You
It's two a.m. and I'm lying in bed
trying to get to sleep
trying to get to you
or maybe to things that used to be

I lie wide awake
looking into the darkness
my mind is static
blank but buzzing
with thoughts
with feelings
with memories

The window is open
my feet are sticking out
they're as cold as the tight clench of my heart at the thought of you
I cover to warm up
but the iciness remains
I had cold feet
Jan 2019 · 347
"My Sweet"
stopdoopy Jan 2019
Coming from the mouth of hate
A deep green ink tumbling out
With those **** red petals
Having been stained by the blood
Spilling into vile words of suffering
Twisting this way and that
As if alive- slithering into place

I would plunge the dagger
Deeper still into your chest
Turning it and slicing on either side
Until I could reach in and pluck
That beating ***** from the cavity
And hold it in my hand, so tenderly
Just as I always have been with you
And then crush it in between palms
Applying more pressure until
The pain is unbearable and then
Maybe you will have felt
What you've put me through
The line about the petals is reminiscent of my poem "Unrequited Love" and both pieces are about the same person.

This one came from the feelings of when you *****- the rising bile, acrid smell, acidic bite, the retching, and the tears.
Jan 2019 · 268
Unrequited Love
stopdoopy Jan 2019
White blossoms with red seeping in.
My quiet love was yours from the beginning.
You are the air in my lungs, the light in my eyes.
Your voice sets off a bombardment of adoration in my heart.
Your words a beautiful curse.
I dreamt of getting lost in you.
I regret to inform you that it hurts
to leave the lights on for no one,
and that there's no heavier burden
than the weightless emptiness of the soul.
You.
I know you'll never love me in the way that I desire.
Your happiness is enough, my dear.
aight so  this is a piece I wrote for my English class two years ago and I didn't know what to write but then I thought of my friend and bam. No surprise but I ended up getting a crush on em, hate em now but oh well, **** happens ya know
Jan 2019 · 437
The Warden
stopdoopy Jan 2019
Dangerous
Sticky red trickles down her stick
Another beating today

Oh how it's my fault
To dare speak of heart felt truth
Tempting you away from "justice"

Just remember
I may be battered and bruised behind bars
But it's you who broke the law
Ever since I wrote Eurydice and had the line "gone is the warden" I knew I'd do a piece based on it, personally to me it's about a hellish woman (as always), but upon rereading I could see it being about many things. What do you see?
Dec 2018 · 482
It's Harder Than it Looks
stopdoopy Dec 2018
I wish you'd never told me.
Now I'm laying in bed,
torn between feeling sorry for myself,
hating you,
and trying to move on.
As I lay here I think back
"I like him,
I don't know if I could love you as more than a friend,
if our relationship can get deeper".
Why did you say it then?
Why did you tell me my feelings were reciprocated?

You doused my burning heart in water,
and now there's no glow at all,
not even a flicker.
an old post breakup poem I never got around to postin til now
Dec 2018 · 575
Woof
stopdoopy Dec 2018
Any time I think of her
my jaw locks
and my teeth press
into a viscous snarl
as if I've become some beast

And I would bite
with words I've held tight
sinking teeth into flesh
and getting it where it hurts

Maybe I am a rabid animal
who's too dangerous to trust
but what does that mean when
you're the one who made me this way
Dec 2018 · 445
The Contact
stopdoopy Dec 2018
The whispers of flesh on flesh
The pressure of you
The slide of fingers down my neck
The breath against a crook
The warmth radiating between us
The blood rushing
The hand on my back
The contact
Dec 2018 · 755
IT IS TIME.
stopdoopy Dec 2018
We are done.

I will no longer sit idle.

I will not wait for my friends to get hurt.

It is long past due,

we will not tolerate it any longer.

Do not make up excuses,

listen to what your friends tell you,

do not give the benefit of the doubt;

they do not deserve it.

If they make you feel

unloved, belittled, ignored, hurt, unsafe,

come to me.

If they call you names

*****, *****, disposable, immature,  a child,

come to me.

Tell, if you wish, all of how they have done you wrong.

Tell me, and I will tell you.

Dump Them.

Gone is the time of "It's none of my business"

Gone is the time of "It's not your relationship"

Gone is the time of "No one asked for your opinion"

That is my friend,

and I will no longer sit and let my friends be hurt.
No matter who you are, friend or not, if you come to me and tell me such things I will not sit there and try to reason it out, I will not hear excuses to their behavior, I will not be forgiving. If you come to me with such words, I will be there to tell you to get out of it now.



I am absolutely fed up with people and how they treat others- that is your partner and you will treat them with the respect they deserve or you will get out. I DO NOT care that you are sexually unsatisfied, feel ignored, and feel unsupported when you have tried gaslighting and dragged in so many things that do not belong in the conversation. I DO NOT care if you are ******* and angry- you treat your partner with the respect they deserve. How dare you.

I'm livid that people will treat others like this and I am done being silent.
Dec 2018 · 507
We Are The Strings
stopdoopy Dec 2018
Pluck one
Then two
Drag them out
As long as you want
Play the song of their hearts
Feelings as tight as you tuned them
Draw them in
So taunt
Until the chord breaks
Played me like a fiddle.
stopdoopy Nov 2018
Eat
1 2 3
Seeds from fruit trees

Love
I've missed you
My cherished one

Soon
You will be
With us again

Cold
Is the earth
Beneath soft snow

But
Way down here
The embers glow

Warm
Are we, beloved
Feelings freely flowing

Waves
Crashing into rocks
Passionate and fierce

Eat
4 5 6
Cross the river Styx
. . . . . .
stopdoopy Nov 2018
Getting soaked to the bone

Until some kind people stopped

And offered me an umbrella

A hot shower
A warm meal
A cozy fire

And a new home

Don't come knocking on my door
When you've seen I've found better

Because the rain has stopped

And all I have left to give

Is a scorching heat to burn you with
For this Thanksgiving I wanted a poem that was happy but I decided to post this one instead and i chose it because maybe it by itself isn't happy but the stuff behind it is. Dedicated to my friends who've helped me, and honestly are just there in my day to day life, you guys feel like my family and I love you all.
Nov 2018 · 415
This Heart Was Made To Love
stopdoopy Nov 2018
Feelings overflowing and spilling out of the fountain.

It warms me, to know you care so deeply.

I'm sorry.

My tears may spill like raindrops,

But I will lay down my flesh time and time again,

Until every inch of me is littered with scars;

And I'm sinking beneath the waves of worry, ache, and sadness.

If it means I can one day find someone,

Who feels the same as me,

Then I will die a thousand times.
A response piece to Cait-Cait's "to you, whom i love very much". This was written months ago and all I remember is we had some very open hearted conversations and I love that we can be so honest with each other. I hope you all find a friend like her.
Nov 2018 · 448
Synonyms
stopdoopy Nov 2018
your love is toxic

my lungs collapsing

beneath the weight of such ugly feelings

so much like a rock

abrasive and heavy

are the words that spill from your mouth

like a faucet of filth

the pressure building

bright red blossoms

like a blow to the face
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