If i were to paint a picture of the thoughts in my head
There would be cold blacks and lonely blues, with hints of  angry reds and melancholy purples. a lively green peeking its way through.

If i were to paint a picture of my soul
There would be firefly yellows and apple reds
As well as autumn hazels and summer fire oranges
with streaks of that lonely blue and speckled with comforting lavender. A rainy gray softening the edges.

If i were to paint a picture of my eyes
There would be warm chocolate browns with flicks of fiery golds.
Blessed to be wide, wise, and curious like that of a doe, along with Long lashes for butterfly kisses.

If i were to paint a picture of my body
There would be rounded shapes, subtle tones, with flowers growing from her hands, all configured into a short, symmetrical figure.

If i were to paint a picture of my smile
I could only hope it would be beaming with the colors of sunshine.

If i were to paint a picture of you
You would be a blank canvas, because i have yet to meet you.
But I'm sure that you would be a beautiful, chaotic, masterpiece, waiting for a painting of me.

Dry grass smouldering,
smoke spiralling up the sky,
nostalgia solidifying in the heart
like rocks of scoria from boiling lava.

An eerie feeling oozing through the pores
forming drops of cool soothing light
holding me in its albino hands.

The colour of light –
is it phantom white, or
a potpourri of sensations?

I remember,
in my tender days
all colours were red.
An effervescent cherry-red radiance
coloured the passions of my heart.

Seven Seas confluencing in the soul,
water throbbing in the expanse of the sea,
sky emptying its azure desires in the sea,
stillness at the heart of the sea –
a placid cauldron of pure life!

That day I met myself -
the mystic in red radiance!

I run into a forest with fudge and green frosting trees.
In there I find squirrels made of cheesecake grey sesame.
The acorns are made of candy hard root beer.
Twigs made of cinnamon to my feet adhere.

The ground has bunches of lime gummy grass.
I saw a rabbit of white chocolate run past.
The foot prints were of cocoa divine.
This forest is filled with deserts that seem mighty fine.

I come to a river filled blue raspberry jelly.
That will surely adhere to my belly.
What am I to do with all these treats?
Is it time to run or do I have time to stop and eat?

I see birds made of cookies and cream.
Is this a terrifying nightmare or a beautiful dream?
The snow falls powdered sugar flutters.
Whoops, stepped in droppings made of peanut butter.

Maybe from a chocolatey brown bear.
Just as tame as that white chocolate hare.
I guess I am getting out of here.
All the sugary stuff that will adhere.

Hopefully I do not attract those.
They are red hot fire ants near a cream filled rose.
Though I finally leave.
What just happened I could not believe.

What matters most
not what shows on top.
But what's at the bottom
the underlying intention.

I wonder what's your thought
What do you see at the bottom
at the crack of dawn?

Can I guess you said
it's the blossoming red rose!

Blue walls and crystal clear tears
the blue boy picked up his pace in fear
through red and yellow and green
and all the colors he could never be

He sat at the corner on a bench up in the hill
and sobbed and screamed and sighed
wishing he could be
all the things that weren't him

"Oh Cosmos! So big and wild,
why did you make me
the world's most blue and lonely guy?"
he cried to the sky in this dark and empty night

Blue walls and crystal clear tears
his eyes flamed red for the first time in years
he started constructing crazy little schemes
this small blue boy and his big red dreams

A single figure cutting a lonesome shadow into the red sand
A sea of red glittering with mineral strength
The wind gathers dust as it traverses the land
Each granule of sand engraved with a word
Love, Hate, Right, Wrong, True, and False
A figure is a young man but a wave of lovely red sand wears at him
Suddenly his features are wizened and his hair fades
The wind blows again and assimilates time
The figure grows more emancipated
Yet his eyes remain, eerie dark pools filled with vicissitudes.
"I come from mortal dust, red sand glitters on me." He mutters
Mortal affairs plague, yet they define.
I grow wiser from the wind of assimilation
I comprehend nature but I lose myself
"I come from mortal dust, and here I stand."
"Awaiting death to reclaim me."
"What will be left of me is mortal dust."
His eyes shined as he grew increasingly older
"I hereby cast aside the mortal world." He whispered as his body faded
"I pursue a grander vision!" His body faded away disappearing into the red sand

what have i done?


my heart
has been filled to the top with liquid—
a glimmering red,
so much so that
it just
burst open.


what have i done?


my heart
is a porcelain doll.
so beautiful, that you want to touch it, but
once you do, it shatters into a million pieces,
because you drop it.


what have i done?


my heart
is a thief with a knife.
it holds it to your chin,
as you struggle and squirm underneath the blade.


look what i have done.








look what i have done.

I want you to feel it when I'm dead
I want you to feel your bones crack
and feel your heart break
I want your eyes to be bloodshot red
and your throat to be sore from screaming
I want you to be sorry for leaving