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I'm so afraid this life without her, a fear I
lived for many years
knowing the day
surely to
come
That she would say her final farewell but my
God so bravely did she
go sat by her Hospital
bed for 3 days and
nights
that was to be her last
never once did she complain In that time
my dearest darling
who stayed so very brave right to the
end
A Tribute to Helen's bravery right to the end my wife and true friend
Bobcat Dec 2018
You think that time would make it easier and maybe I'd just forget.
I still think about that day often but I'm starting to think about it less.

I don't know if I should feel guilty because you're not always on my mind.
Or maybe that's just what happens when you've been gone such a long time.

I do wonder if you'd be proud of me and the things that I've done.
Would you tell me that you're happy because I finally found the one?

I do have a lot of questions that I know will never get answered.
Because you left your body here and your beautiful soul was transferred.

Thank you for the memories I'll hold them close to my heart.
I promise to try my best when I think of you not to fall apart.

I hope that you're happy there and you're able to get some rest.
I'll always have a place for you inside my hollow chest.
Jo Swan Sep 2018
Dearest Douglas,

Is it strange, we meet in a moment of chaos?
The mystic forces of fate pull us together,
In a time where our life path is full of woes
Fate calls us to fight against the stormy weather
So this encounter, is it what heaven has bestowed?

For years my heart hid behind the gates of darkness
As memories of the past burned with resentment
I felt the sinister shadows of life’s bleakness,
Where the affection of my father had been absent,
The stains of sin had taught me to become heartless.

Yet in this fleeting moment of life, our paths meet,
My heart burns passionately by your gentle grace
The ravenous linger thoughts of you taste so sweet
As I felt sense of peace when I glance at your face-
I am lost by your eyes that glow with gracious heat.

In an autumn’s day where solemn truths were revealed,
Your dad’s poor health had left you to feel dejected.
Tears of pain touched my soul so that it can be healed-
To release grudges that had been infected
By the violent past - a new hope has been sealed-
Three different people’s lives have been affected!

Though our life paths moved in opposite direction,
Forces of fate push us to an uncertain life!
In a distant sky there is a strange connection,
An alliance formed when the world is full of strife,
We enter into journey of introspection!

In this moment of personal revelation,
You haunt me in my thoughts; you haunt me in my sleep.
I think I am a fool to have such affection
Yet this fate left a lasting impact that runs deep
My heart smiles to see your caring complexion!

Time wafts like Mother Nature changing its season,
Yet in this uncertain world we reunite again.
This fate is strange but there is a divine reason
We are to meet as there is a lot we have gained
At least for me I can feel the love of the Son.

I know these tender feelings you can’t reciprocate
I look at the sky and thank him for his full bless
To have met you in my frail vulnerable state.
I feel the moonlight embrace me with full caress,
Maybe it is time for us to depart on this date.

Do not feel these feelings I have is of sorrow
As one day I will meet a General of great might.
This strange fate has allowed my soul to heal and grow.
Wherever you may be, I wish you to shine so bright!
I don’t know what destiny beholds tomorrow,
But fond thoughts of you will drift my soul with delight!

(c)2018 Joanne Chang
A moment when we meet someone special who transforms our life with the gift of love.
audrey Sep 2018
there were some growing aches, but you came and heal it.
there were some growing pains, but you replace them with your purity.
there were some illnesses, but you treat them well.
there was an aching soul, but you hold it tight.

there was my darkest time, but something lead me to a light. I never knew, you are that light.
there was me struggling, can't find my way back home. a whisper told me, you are my home.
there was me looking for something lost, then I found you back.
there was playing my puzzle, can't complete it well. but then you came, my missing puzzle piece.

there was me drowning in my world. but you held me up, save me in your arms, telling everything's fine, as long as I'm with you.
Janna Aug 2018
I’m sorry

For doubting you

Your dreams, your beliefs

Your desires, your grieves

I’m sorry

for projecting fear on you

For taking one step behind

Because I thought about all the things

That could hurt you

But not all the opportunities that it could bring

I’m sorry

For not loving you enough

For hurting your body

And forgetting your soul

Leaving your mind empty

With everything foul

I’m sorry

For leaving you breathless

Tired eyes, weary sighs

You are more than you think

But I don’t tell you enough

I’m sorry for holding you back

Making you feel worthless

**** and sad

Losing your sense of inner beauty

Judging you, your outer seemed filthy

I’m sorry

I promise to love you better

So your heart will always be whole

- an apology letter to myself

soulwriterj
A lot of the time, we blame others and we also blame ourselves. But it’s time to snap out of it. To learn from our mistakes, to get up, give ourselves a chance to improve and be better, not stay in the hole we dug for ourselves.
I wrote this letter to myself on 9th November last year. It’s not because I was feeling sorry for myself but because I became aware that I HAD to stop feeling sorry for myself, my situation, my downfalls, my mistakes but to rise above, saying sorry to myself shifted my perspective, and the thing that brought me to this awareness is the belief that the God I know has accepted and loves
me for all that I am, now I too can accept myself, all that I am and who I can grow to become.
Ask yourself what you have to do to get out of the hole you’re in, don’t focus on how you got in there anymore, definitely don’t stay or think you can get comfortable in there.. find a way out, there’s always a way out.
Jon Thenes Jul 2018
Suiside upon instruction
Through institution
By relation to another
And being bared upon
By your own misfiring soul

A shaky exit ;
Lonely
Or lonely, with company
Approach The Pig Empty
With a mind and not a rattle
; a pressure of Taughts

  in loving nothing
  glove oblivion
  a pardon from suffering ?
  a finite mime

       Signed   - a guest
Em MacKenzie May 2018
Most first words between lovers start
as a "hello," or a "nice to meet you."
We did not have a first word.
Instead we had a first look;
pure eyes gazing sunlight for the first time.
We also shared a first smile,
maybe out of nervousness, maybe out of awe, most likely out of finding completion.
If time could actually stop, it would've at that exact moment,
because, as self involved and narcissistic as this seems,
you and I meeting caused all stars and planets to align,
and destiny let out a sigh of relief,
for we had found each other
and in a way, by doing so,
found ourselves.

You refuse to believe that every spare moment I have is spent thinking of you,
and even the thoughts I can't spare, you slide your way into my head just where you belong.
You would never believe the light I see you in,
not when I almost bathe myself in self inflicted darkness,
but your light I shine on you and you radiate naturally yourself
guides me from the shadows I try to drown myself in,
and while sometimes you hold my head under the water,
your soft fingers could tangle in my hair and drag me back up from the pitch black sea
and make me believe it was always too shallow to drown myself in to begin with.

I've written endless novels about your beauty,
and sonnets about your mind.
I've sang songs about your heart,
and poems about your soul being a match to mine.
I hold the pen but your existence writes the words.
You are what all poets write about,
and you are what every romantic longs for.
You are inspiration.
You are heaven personified.

How many times have I reminded you that I have an impeccable memory?
That I am both blessed and cursed to remember every word you've spoken: good or bad.
Every look we've shared:
close or far.
And every touch that set every fibre of my being afire,
and how much I long for it every waking moment when you are not connected to me.

We are two parts of a whole:
blue skies and rain,
sun and moon,
you and I and I and you.
I love you with everything I was, everything that I am
and everything that I will ever be.
I will love you even when I can no longer force a beat from my chest.
You are my oxygen and I will never adapt to breathe anything else.

My biggest fear was always living my life without you,
but now it's tied with you never knowing just how breathtakingly perfect you are just by living,
and just by naturally being who you are.

A song from the birds,
I'll translate to define,
I'll say the words,
I am hers and she is mine.
Until no songs are heard,
until the sun cannot shine,
I'll say the words,
I am hers and she is mine,
from this day until the end of time.
We made hearts from rocks on the shore of our favorite lake
I made love to you while we painted our front room
We spent endless amounts of time kissing in the forest
I kissed your neck lovingly and often
We cooked dinner together, there was so much pasta
We spent a lot of time waking up together, but not a lot of time sleeping
We had a fluffy white cat and a white front door
Our little house in the woods was home
I was cold and you were warm
We drank too much whiskey and ***** straight from the bottle
You used to get jealous
Your fingers were always in my hair or on my hips
I spent a thousand hours laying on your chest
I waited for you
Christmas was our season
You love lemon bars
I wore your sweatshirts
In my mind you will always be in Boston
The snow outside our house was always icy, it crunched under our feet
We never got to finish anything we started
You drove a nice car
I used to trace hearts on your chest with my fingertips
You used to give speeches about how much you loved me
I reminded you of sunshine
You smelled like home
I died every moment without you
We don't speak of Jon
I still think of you first when I think of wolves
You called me Alice
I wanted nothing more than to be her
You strayed from me once
You would try to leave when you got angry
I looked up at you from under my lashes
I liked to kiss you softly
You held me tight, like I was slipping away
We started smoking around the same time
You were my escape
I was yours
We spent most of our time together at night or on the weekends
Holidays were our days
You left but I always waited for you
Your smile was always woofish, but you were always petting my hair
You wanted to talk about kids
I wanted you to come home
You offered me the chance at the life we'd built
You told me the truth once and it was always there in the back of my mind
Even though our world was make believe, it was real to me
This year would mark 9 years
I miss you every single day
I don't know how to escape all the feelings I have for you
You're not what I pictured, but you're so beautiful
Who we are fits together
I was the one running for a little while
I have no way to reach you now
You won't let me buy the pieces of art that you create now, painting instead of helping me make worlds out of nothing
You broke my heart again not too long ago
Because I can't reach you to let you know that I love you, Jenny
Even though You Lied, Love
Joe: 144 versus 1-2
It was the authenticity within the lie that trapped them both inside of it. They played God with a world they could not keep from collapsing, and now that it is gone they must bear the burden of the pieces that ended up trapped inside of them.
Karisa Brown May 2018
Her hair blossomed
Orange lilacs
Underneath her
Firey stare

She performed magic
In another's eyes
And made them
Disappear

She held tight to
The rhythm that night
Then too let it
Slip away

Why the grasp she was
So hungerly needing
Why the long face

My bravest
Youre in love
With a ghost
You must erase
Richie Apr 2018
We're literally two worlds apart but that doesn't stop me nor you to be distant with each other. We have so many options but we chose to stay. You could have blocked me or I may have blocked you. But, we never allowed that to happen.

We've been through a lot. We shared different stories in our lives but it all boils down to one thing, we're both in PAIN. We were beset by many difficulties in life and had suffered so much.

We both grieve differently and I must say grieving never stops. On that note, I should be and will always be grateful that God has allowed your presence to walk through my path. Could this be by chance? Or, could this by kismet? We never know.

And what most people don't understand, you stood up. Often times, you see me crying. You saw me when I was heartbroken. And, I am aware that I once broke your heart too. I want to say "SORRY" but that's not enough. As the song goes, "There You'll Be". You've always been there: when I laugh, when I am crazy, when I think I am beautiful, when I think I am ****, and above all you stayed when I was at the worst moments in my life.

It brings music to my ears when you said once that with my presence, you find solace. Trust me, it will always be that way. And, if I should ever write my life story, surely I'd allot a space for you.

My dearest friend, together we will find a place where there's happiness and that happiness will burn down the PAIN.
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