I never remember
but three nights ago
I dreamt a
about a car accident.
In my dream
I watched a
bride and her groom
over by a
(I think it's odd
that I want a truck
Don't you think
The mother wailed
blood was on the asphalt
the sirens screamed in my ear
but they didn't arrive
I just watched
Just stared while
through the places
it should flow.
Then I woke up and
have been disturbed
by my dream
I dreamt that dream
three night ago.
Limitations of the human heart,
So fickle and feisty and miserable.
Like a coin with two-faces apart,
I flip it like a switch as I gamble.
Losing my warmth like I've died,
I kept on walking barefoot in the Arctic.
I've lost my senses and forgot how to walk,
I fell down and drowned in the cold.
Feelings of contentment, "I tried."
Feelings of madness, "It's chaotic!"
Feelings of hopelessness, "Aftershock..."
Feelings of warmth, "No!", I called.
I wanted to give up all hope,
Inhumane to every emotion,
All I wanted was to cope,
But love was a miserable affliction.
As I tread this path of harsh winds,
Guided by what seems to be light,
I fell down into the ice-cold ocean,
And as I drowned, it was warm afterall...
Im not gon' write a poem about you.
I'm not about to allow you to make me FEEL
And allow you to fill
In such a way that my subconscious has to throw you up and onto a page
I'm not about to write a poem for you
Nooo siree, you see I've made that mistake
When I was young and silly and hopeful.
I went and bought a fancy pen
The kind that writes so smoothly and makes my cursive extra pretty, but you know it bleeds?
I thought the ink that dripped from MY pen once it soaked through
It would sort of seal us in the paper
Like I said, I was mistaken so
I'm not about to write a poem for you TOO
And just leave myself exposed?
I mean who knows
if I replace those little tiny "o"s for hearts over my "i"s when I dot em that soon you could care less
For the stress on my esteem after you're mean leaving the apples of my cheeks with salty tears streaming down them
I refuse to tell the world how you made me blush when your lips found them.
Or how we had so much in common
It was raining but we just kept walking
You made me laugh until I was coughin'
I ain't gonna do it
I've learned its better to not let you soften-
But instead I mold bricks
cause it seems noone wants to actually bring any GOOD to it.
Seems 9 times out of ten all they want to DO
Is to do IT
when all I want is you to put
my hand in yours and stare into my eyes and search my heart and not my thighs
I'm not gonna try
And make this something more than what is was.
Just because of what I felt the warm and fuzz of flirty words spoken over Patty melts?
It was nice.
But I dont think that warrant's you a poem.
Not an admonition of my humanness
Not another proclamation of my foolishness
for allowing myself to think,
dare I say hope
that those two hours of my precious life were 2 not wasted?
And Not worth the energy for me to store the memory
in the best way made for me to preserve it?
How am I supposed to know that you deserve it?
But how can I resist within that moment?
After reflectin' on my day I find my mind keeps
on those two hours in Ferndale
And how we talked until nightfell.
Forgot to feed the meter cause what is time?
Hell I was frozen by you, guy.
I digged my nose into your life and just kept goin.
You had the audacity to inquire about my dreams and all my passions
and what makes me get up outta bed every morning
So I HAD to ask you back
And I listened
And I enjoyed what you said
And as we parted ways I had to immediately LIE
and document it in my head
It was nice
But don't let yourself get excited
Felt like I was on cloud 9 but gotta hide it
Come off the high
Cause what if in the end it's unrequited?
and I'm upset with you
HATING you for letting me feel slighted
Yeah you tried it.
I mean YOU didn't.
At least not yet...
I just don't wanna write another poem that I'll want to forget.
I knew you brief
listen to the radio station
very nice man
not just a drunk
but a man with ideas
just to many beers
self expression was the way
and a DJ
Where has the fire gone?
Extinguished by exhalations of exhaustion.
Cut down like grass on a lawn
Is a once lush poet-tree of creativity.
Did I heed the signs of caution?
Drowned by disappointment and shame,
I emerged alive, I survived,
But my hopes could not say the same.
They settled with the sediment,
Oh, how I miss when they thrived!
When did it occur,
The moment my heart was drained?
And who was the one to procure
The passion with which I was fashioned?
From stained glass to broken glass, stained.
The inventive ambition has waned,
The glowing spectrum has faded.
I pray all will be reattained.
For I am overworn and forlorn;
Once sculpting precious gems, now just simply jaded.
as the day has left me
love is still there
for special ones
I thank these inspirations
for love's desire
invigorates and sustains
this weary soul
So I look forward
to being together soon
who make me whole
Now to croon this tune
to a crescent moon
to telegraph it
to telepath it
Just to do this lifts me up
I believe my targets get it
even if they don't know it
I'm a love transmitter
a shining sun
in a world that's done
This is fun
because you have won
if you learn to love