You became
A distant memory,
Nothing left of you
But a story for the moon

I told you I caught feelings
And you said you felt them too
But now three long days have gone by
And there's no sign of you.

You're not mine and I don't want you to be.
But I want to claim your attention like a trophy.

It's not love, but it's something new.
Not many would understand what's between me and you.

Your kisses caress my skin softly,
And leave a trail of burning desire as I moan breathlessly.
I crave your touch and to feel you against me.
What is this forbidden dance of passion and fantasy?

Yet I do not dare to question this mystery.
I let myself enjoy our bodies moving in harmony.

No, you're not mine, and I don't want you to be.
Yet what is this gnawing feeling that grows inside me?

I tell myself not to think too much.
But you always know how to make me blush.

I let a tear drop fall at the thought of the fate of of us.
Not daring to question what we are or make a fuss.

you were a fever pitch of a dream
my lips pressed flushed to your edges
searing and splitting my seams open

grief trickled out

a steady stream of
red sticky warm
tasting just like sugar if i run my tongue
along the right corner

breath bated
teeth parted

                                                                                                          pregnant.
                    
                                                                                                                pause.

it threatens to escape
an unwarranted sigh
snaking its way through my cracks
reaching to close the space between us

if i breathe it into existence
it will change everything.

inhale, exhale
brace for impact.

reckless with abandon
the wind sweeps our caution away
gently, at first, then somehow all at once

if i said
'i love you'
would it be a fact or weapon?

you rose up from the murky depths
breaking the surface of stilled waters
disturbing tranquil oceans and calm seas

at first, a gentle ripple-

rolling roiling reeling
collecting bones of sunken ships
pulling pieces of dredged up memories
along your wake of destruction

you turn yourself inside out
over
          and over
                          and over

into crested waves
crashing into my sandy banks

darling,
wash away all my self control
and resistance built up over pent
disappointments and picketed frustrations

the past engulfs me;
heat of your skin pressed against mine
lips pursed in anticipation
of the last time you said you loved me

love,
flood my lungs
for i think i'm running out of air
to breathe into this mirage.

I hate when I make you cry
But *******, do your words hurt
I want to hold your tears in my arms and turn them into smiles
Shove them back into your estranged face
Maybe it will make a difference this time
You're not who you used to be
Am I still allowed to love you?
Can I still hold you with my words
Because my arms are not enough?
Hearts carved into my corneas weep with the thought of you
My fingers curl into twisted willows
Affection turns to concern
When your palms turn to fists
Will you forgive yourself?
Will you forgive me?
I don't want to go
I don't want to turn into a memory
I want to be a future
Maybe someday when you finally learn to love
To love the chasm of beauty of sadness that you are
I can drop more love letters into your darkness
Petals and whispers and poetry
Drift into your emptiness until they light aflame at the very bottom
If I could see it from your perspective
If I could feel the pain that wracks your body late at night
The pain that tastes suspiciously like tears
Maybe then we could truly understand each other
I wish my pretty words could heal you
I wish on every star I see
It's juvenile, but a part of me always hopes
I wish I could take all my love and crush it up into a little ball and shove it down your throat and never feel it again

once a month
when you see the moon
basking in the glow of her lunar lunacy

her belly filled to the brim with stardust
hauling the drunken songs of sailors
to her like a tide

i hope you think of me.

you have
such a hold on me
tight gripped choke like a
lump that's settled and
made a home in my throat
that i can't swallow down.