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Jaxey 7d
He stole all my heels
because he doesn't like it
when he can't look down on me
I stole them back
the rag from the third leg is out and the table is wonky
i forgot you took it out to wipe my blood off the marble
the white in-between the tiles is still very faintly brown
and you no longer walk on it without socks  
i’m sorry i tried to leave without warning

sprouting sensations depleting, i’m in the numbness
all-natural defeat in my glassy eyes
through the fog you might see a green of grey
my mutated self is in abstraction and in the form of
splotches of sliced
and scratchy skin stuck to the folds and furrows of our shredded bed
shredded from cries and shivers that soak it, my restless fingers tear it
remains torn like the tendons in what resembles a beating heart  
leaving you with no good sleep

bodies hurt and scar when they touch me
yours is now strangely having to be reacquainted

my breaths, laid out and cut on the chopping board
into slices they unravel and tangle
as they fall into the floorboards
slowly becoming lost and forgotten
i’m caving in
i’ve left you with creases
and without a shelter free from the smell of monstrous
misery that we choke on every morning

where is joy
it seems it’s taken my strength
my joints are weak and shaky
i can’t even stand, its very unnerving
how am i meant to carry all the noises
that weight twice as much
in moments like this
of irregular gravity
i’m sorry i tried to leave without warning
julianna Oct 4
I find myself running back to you time and time again.
Am I really the type let myself get trapped in a toxic relationship?
I didn’t think myself this dumb...
To let myself get stepped on, used, or dumped.
But I am not at fault.
I am not dumb for falling for this disgusting game that you called a “friendship”  
No. But rather,
I am a victim
Of the gross manipulation of a human in need (me) by a toxic monster (you).
Amelia 4d
The wilted leaves of the plant you gave me
begin to peel away
lingering on the sunny window ledge
starting to fade on this day.

I laughed at its structure
and how it reminded me of us:
started out blooming and blossoming
but soon we lost our trust.

Today, I feed a new plant
with the tears I cried over you,
and with the warmth that I never received,
I began to build something new.

I smiled at its structure
and how it reminded me of myself:
started out small and feeble
But I am no longer just a decoration on the shelf.
eve Sep 27
we communicate through the phone maybe once or twice a week
you uphold my financial status, but have no relative experience in raising me.
you claim to be a trying father, but your behavior never match up to your promises.
you think being a dad is a check off a ballot, an easy task to complete, truly believing that money will always compensate for happiness,
but imagine if you put as much thought into yelling and screaming at your mother when you get mad over the tiniest thing into realizing your beloved daughter, mamita linda, carries a heavy burden with her and on her shoulders each and every day.
she faces people who mock her in class and treat her with no respect for doing what she feels is right
she judges her face fat, waist size, and stretch marks in the morning
dealing with things teenagers her age shouldn’t be dealing with and after all that she has had to support herself by carrying that burden of teaching herself everything she doesn’t knows and even, about men that treat women with ultimate disrespect
like you, she looses patience easily and the gates of hell break open when she rambles on while temporarily disregarding who she is where she is and who she is talking with, no matter what, she will continue to rant about whoever or whatever drove her to lose that one thought in mind, waiting to be said in that moment of time.
half the time she is missing out on hanging out with her friends because you tell her she is not supposed to do that,
she is unsatisfied, spell one divided by two on her forehead
nobody understands what she says, according to a wannabe intellect in her advanced placement classes
she prefers a busy schedule because she moves on quickly and does not prefer sitting down, tuning into pointless, nonstop lectures, and perfectly accentuated monologues written and presented by her father in front of everyone she cares about.
as a result of that, she cries herself to sleep, dwelling on the thought of that while praying for someone or something, to take her away in the middle of the night
she fights waking up in the morning, to repeat the daily routine and process of adding more than she can handle on her plate
you can consider her a runaway from personal issues,
but you should be thanking her for still existing and experiencing a cruel world that surrounds her.
be grateful she is blessed with the right mindset, she is not following in your footsteps and making half the mistakes you once did,
those mistakes, every single of them amount to the overall guilt that rises in your throat before you prepare yourself to speak or perhaps, whenever people propose an idea that isn’t yours.
she reflects on your weakest points and tells herself to consider what she needs to learn more about,
her reflection connects to the previously mentioned thought process that is on-going in school
her hand trembles as she grips the pencil because she writes a lot to relieve her senses and stresses of past abuse and mental break downs.
call her a try hard, but in reality,
she is dealing with things nobody would ever think could be possible
she paints a picture in her head of a perfect life, one that involves leaving from the once familiar faces and settings she once admired,
placing everyone she has ever cared about to the side without rational thought, she is saying goodbye to those she would never think to,
she chose not to overcome her stressful relationship with her dad,
instead, she just got up and left, leaving everything she has ever considered to be important behind along with the boy she incessantly thought would someday provide for her.
a circle of thoughts run in and out of her scattered head everyday,
and if you are still wondering why, it is because she has big shoes to fill and lesson plans to organize when she travels from one place to another
she cannot seem to sort out or understand her issues fully yet she tries and strives and drives herself to the point in which she lets her work ethic outperform the people in the room.
she not only copes with the rude remarks and “constructive criticism” from ignorant people,
but with confronting people about issues she is has no part in
she is deep involved in unveiling the reasoning behind why, these people, of all people, attempt to grasp a hold of her, only then will they be able to clash their issues with hers.
similar to the behavior of her father,
her mom attests to her daughter serving her daughter’s fathers’ outlook on life itself because they act the same exact way.
she and he demand until their words fall short and their tears begin to escape from the corners
she and he cry until their sockets cannot take anymore and hearts begin to race double the beats per minute
they pounce on each other like enemies,
even though, they are blood tied and reflections of each other
as much as she hates to admit it, both she and he know it’s true,
but he will forever get his way and she will get her messages across every time.
A Sep 27
My love
My enemy
My best friend
My drive me crazy
My Pain in the ****
Yeah that's my baby
Lets fight and argue now
And make up for it later
Not always
But for forever
My love
My oh so funny
Got me laughing
While im crying
My best high
My worst addiction
My little drug
Oh You so handsome
And so lovely
Although
Your intentions were so ****
You're toxic
You're like poison
Still I'll love you til the end
Because you're also so much more
And I'll pretend you meant no harm
I'll disregard the **** you said
Though I cant forget
All the memories you left
Up in my head
My hunny
My dear
My sweetheart
My apologies for the rough start
I promise
Soon it wont have to be so hard
And I hope one day you can learn from this
So you can rest your heavy heart
Whats in the past is considered history
Just move on
I believe in you
My love
My one and only
My kiss and warm hug me
My late night smoking buddy
My good my bad my ****
So evil yet so loving
No goodnight this time
My baby im afraid
That this just may be
My final last goodbye
Here's another just for you
i promise you
the pills you swallowed
couldn’t possibly have tasted
as bitter as the resentment
she must’ve felt
knowing you put your life in her hands

you could not ruin yourself
as much as you’ve ruined her
tonight he overdosed to try and convince us all to stay
Growly Wolfus Sep 22
"Hurt you, cut you, shoot you."  Still, you
can never seem to understand why.
"Burn you, hit you, curse you."  If you
do nothing you'll surely die.
You are sad and I am mad that you listen to the devil's kind.
These voices all fill your mind causing you to slowly go blind.

"Scare you, maim you, hate you, hang you, strangle you
until you choke."
"Ignore you, gore you, **** you before you
believe this all to be a big joke."
Hunt you, catch you, stop you, tell you
"You'll get through all this someday."
"Love you."  Laughs you, free you. thought you,
"Everything is now okay."
Happy you but angry I.  It felt as if you spat in my face.
I will **** you.  You must die for rejecting me in this way.
Ran from me, but now you see I only wanted some of your love.
Lie to be brave and think you're safe.  I'm the one you're running from.

Find you, rope you, **** you, ***** you.
Make sure you never forget.
Scar you, beat you, stab you, bleed you
out.  You're no longer a threat.
Run you out and cut you down.
Hide you where you won't be found.
Tell everyone you had drowned.
Screams heard not over the sound
of the rushing water.

...suffering no longer......
A lover's view on their partner's suicidal issues, becoming so fed up they **** them.
I wanted to try repetition, repetition, repetition.
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