Wine, songs and love. They adorn the festive night: So live, whoever imagines kissing and loving and drinking and singing! Three friendly stars flash into the darkness of life; the stars sparkling so confidently; They are called song, love and wine ...

                                                                                          Theodor Körner

sometimes, more than sometimes, but not as often as everyday,
i think about how those eyes you have consumed me,
the way their darkness was in complete contrast to the light you expelled,
and i think about how they would linger into my deep green eyes,
often that look was a wash of colour, but yet it was a pool of feeling,
i felt your love in that look, in those eyes, no matter how many times
they broke the colour so quickly that everything was bland, i felt it in the way
you would smile like your eyes were the ones that were hungry
and i wasn’t your prey, but i grew the light you would shine from, and
you grew the happiness i would have to bury, the tombstone that you carved broke into shards of colour all of which turned black when you cried yourself to sleep in the unholy grave that you made me dig.

I sit in this car
Stoned out of my brain
Wondering what remains
Lust?
Love?
Or nothin at all.
When you where once my all
I hope you find happiness
I hope you find what you need
Because your happiness
Means the world to me

You are the chain
Keeping me sound
Keeping me stable
Keeping me around
Your reach is solid
Your links are strong
Your spoken truth
My inner security song

All the while I push you down
All the while I kill myself
All the while the drugs do me in
All the while
                       this wile
Is shortening.

But still,
You dance in my fire
Cozy in this self-sufficient hell
These self-expelled death knells
Ringing in my head
Now found in yours
And they’ll never stop ringing

But still,
There you are
Giggling in my fire-flattened meadows
And when it comes time to turn off the hose
When I ask you to leave this place
Making light of your feelings
(That've come from being displaced)
Because they're all negligible to a life of pain beside this face

But still, you stay
I’m guilty without a vacancy
But still, you stay
I just want a vacant me
But still, you stay
Please, let me die
But still, you stay
Why haven’t you forsaken me?

Now that you are Men.

Seek the greater challenge
Walk the harder road
Choose the path less taken

Know the higher good
and seek ye first...God

Search for and know
the beautiful and the best
The better and the blessed

Wisdom and happiness

Shun the shadows
and those there cursed

Have a feel for the way
when all seems lost
Remember to Love
and love well
No matter the cost

Forever follow your destinies
everlasting forever star
Know and know well
Your Father cares
and watches from
both near and afar.

'When I was a child
I spake as a child
I understood as a child
I thought as a child

When I became a man
I put away childish things.'

-The Holy Bible (KJV)

-R.

(10.12.16)
-LA

She has found calmness in herself
The past fades into the clouds
Her mind drifts into heaven
Peace has awaken her soul

And so she sat there,
smiling quietly,
watching the sun set fire
to the bright green trees,
feeling the window warm against her head,
as frizzy hair brushed her shoulders.
Music flowed through her earbuds,
the scent of orange bloomed
in the gently chattering bus.
Fridays couldn't be better,
and life was beautiful.
Too bad she'd have to leave it behind.

Screeching stung the lovely afternoon,
spinning, and spinning, and spinning.
A cocktail of chemicals rushing,
flushing out the floating happiness.

Black, and tears, and tragedy.
The most beautiful of souls had to pass before all others.

over feeling under the weather.
i want to spend the rest of my life
chasing rainbows from shore to shore
and trying to find my toes in
the curly white billowing pillows and sheets
and fresh oxycontin smelling
bottomless depths of cloud nine.
i'm trying to find that fresh pine scent
when you're pining for someone new
and you feel like you could climb
the highest heights, and drink from
the alpine air. and there on that
mountain top: a lucky four leaf clover,
four new leaves to turn over,
you're turning things around and
pulling your head out of the clouds
and putting your feet back on the ground.
over feeling under the weather
and whether i find myself on cloud nine
or i reach seventh heaven
or i fall short of finding anything
i'm trying to find a reason to live again.