Moments of love and fear of losing you
but I have already lost you!
look love costs
a sunken stopped clock
cries
but still I wait
worry lines or indents of a smile form
I was yours before I was born
I will be yours waiting behind white doors
when I die
answers chime
like prophetic rhymes
will you come find me
To hear the things I should of said
A revealing that will steal your heart
we should’ve never been apart
I call your name on the wind
it reverberates from within.
I waited…

You're late for your funeral
Good cause I don't want you to be just a numeral
another number on a statistic
Time is a killer and it's sadistic
Let's be realistic
although you have wisdom
of sages
I don't want time to take you although it rages
You mean to me the world and more
I am sure you will not need to go through heavens door
Right now for sure
Hold on a little longer
Linger in this life
For our separation would cause me much strife
Don't let time take you into its void
Where I cannot follow.

An artist with eyes wide open
sees art spoken
the silence between words and phrases
Illuminates the ideas
within.

They live out thousands of lives
in the confines of one
a commentator, a spectator
yet living and being
and seeing all
no matter how small.

breathing in the darkness and light
meditating on intricacies
Like that of a flower
held by a *****
eternity shivers
Possessed by their grasp
caught between pain and rapture
the pen stains the page with ink
Blessed be the imagination in which they sink
and swim
these poets that are skin
and soul
eyes that travel and unravel
mysteries that we shall never see
places and faces between you and me

The depth of field
and focus of which
can never be seen
the poet is dreamer.

In the land of books and make believe
A story unwritten with the power to make you cry
The modern day Orpheus looks to the sky
For the answer
The answer to why.

See everywhere there are answers
But love doesn't follow through
With Reflected mirrors it doesn't respond to you
See the path may be long and prince must be strong
But endurance was never his strong point
Disjointed he always disappoints
The princess whom he favours

A thousand years to savour in the eye of the storm
Nothing can touch him
But if that's true why was he born?
In feeling pain of loves sweet kiss withdrawn
Hand that held her hand now is worn
Getting older and older each day
He prays to time to make it ok
But time is a trickster and it will take itself away

He is the night to her day
But somewhere a dead man is calling for his crown
Was their love only a noun
A name for something that lies underground
The prince's heart still beats
And while it beats he will not retreat
But he must give up all he has gained
Or be maimed
By the wisdom that all despise
The temple of a thousand eyes
The tangled web
That tethers us all together


See he must fight himself and die
Or be caught up in his own lies
For if love be eternal
Can it stop the fires of hell that be infernal
And maybe all can be saved
Through union

But royalty must break
And be severed
One must yield
For the madman must be revealed
Or he must return his hostage
The other mind
To break the curse to finally be free
His love must bear responsibility




The white rabbit prince goes to war

Monsters gather underneath my bed
Like fallen angels
My beaten heart
Unyielding




The white rabbit prince goes to war part2

The door stands unlocked
A war for salvation
Must be fought
With the broad sword
That comes out of his mouth
You may think what you like
His is the heaven age,  begetting a new age
People may think they can get to him
They never will
**** his words


The princess dies

She is overwhelmed by the dark
He cannot save her
Demons grow out of her heart
Terrible to behold
A heart made cold
Her bloodline ends with her son with him
Now her heart flickers dim
She devours tragedy
Avidly
Her eyes rage against him
Her words cut through his mind
They run him through
Like the madness that grew and grew
Carnivorous eyes
Stare from the palace
That used to be holy
She is a woman scorned
Sets him up for a fall
As their love hits the wall
She can never forgive him
Only her soul remains
With raging fire
Against him
All he has is nightmares about her now.

Who fired the first bullet?
Who drew the first knife?
Who took the first life?
Who verbally assaulted the first person
Who's fear did worsen
into fight rather than flight
in the dark night
Of the human soul
How do we address the bloodshed and killing
What if we were willing
To let go of the bloodshed show
We know what is like to know
What is like to live in tribes
But if worked together love, unity and hope would arrive.

The hanged man

A satanic symbol
A cup of blood made into wine
The death of the divine
His flesh made into bread
that we eat in silent reverence for the dead
You were made to pay for our sins
But we still live on your grace
A miss shaped agonised face
You are said to be immortal
A portal to heaven
Where we can all live in paradise
We just have to drop our human vice
and be forgiven and believe
But did you die only for a story?
That an apple was picked from a tree
You took a fall for Adam and Eve and all humanity
Or was it just an elaborate con
That our civilisation leans upon
That we are taught that we are inherently evil
Or else we would live, love and forgive
Perhaps the universe understands
that humanity lives on a see saw
one day you're on top, tomorrow you're in free fall
The one gift we have is life
However short
Love each other understand others like you already knew
You don't have to be taught.

In the whisperer of the nights breeze
in the murmur of words she softly said 
I knew she wasn’t really dead
in the movement of the trees outside, with their leaves
the way the photo album opened with ease
the noise of your footsteps chased me to bed 
dreams of you linger in my head
I am left longing for you to tease
things I swear move on their own
sometimes i can hear the rattling of plates
I am never ever left alone
I am the man who sits and waits
hearing the noise of the television drone 
I hear your voice it communicates.

In the heart aching
Love can be found
In mad words said by children
A song will sound
In leaves blowing in the wind
In the branches raising and falling
Praying to the sun and to the sky
Eternity caught which catches a tear in your eye
In the ripples of pebbles skimming across a lake
Time spent swerving around us
Which we lovingly make
In the actions and reactions of scientific visions
In the surgeons hands which show precision
Life is a dance of communication
A play formed for us to see
Life is a story of you and of me.

Rain falling on the decomposing leaves
cold autumn air breathed in warm lungs
the wind blows muttering ghost stories
into our ears.

Pumpkins carved into wickedly twisted smiles
as we dress up for Halloween discos and parties with style
gathering sweets as we go
while the full moon glows.

Bonfires built as we wait for the 5th of November
when fireworks will explode and sparkle in the night sky
we remember the gun powder plot
as we toast marshmallows on the bonfire.

She's trouble so they say
She'll slay your heart
Tear it apart
Never mind her history
She's a mystery
Neglected as a child
Emotional abuse
she hates men
Does she have a reason?

behind her eyes lesions and cuts to her soul
Though they call her **** and say she's out of control
She yearns and burns for a man who will calm her inner being
See the hurting girl inside who's trapped in her own head
Instead of taking her to bed for a one night stand
A love that hold her through the lonely hours
A love that will never sour
Or grow cold
Or scold her for being her
A love that inspires fire
That comforts her
and talks her through agonising visions of the past
A love that lasts.

There is longing behind your eyes
A choir of whys spoken, yet the silence isn't broken
My saviour syndrome sits on white horse
A knight or nightmare?
I blame myself in the garden of blank stares
I stand alone, does anybody care?
Alone in the crowd
My only shroud or veil
Is the madness on which I sail
The forlorn hope
A ship without sails
It's mast clenched by the winds fingernails
Every moment either contradicts
Or affirms
I am having one of my turns
Reason the truth burns.

When the only snow you see in December is in your snow globe
When the only Christmas spirit is alcohol
When you've filled up on too much on Christmas food
and the super market cashier is being rude
When your turkey won't cook
and kids and toys are making too much noise
and the adult boys are out for the count after eating
and your so tired you feel like you've taken a beating
when Christmas telly is all repeats
and you are the only person in the street without decorations
and you are left alone to make preparations for the big day.
When you've got a stinking man flue cold that won't go away
and the smell of cold Brussel sprouts is like mould
and you've been told that this Christmas hasn't met expectations
and the box of chocolate sensations has all gone
Remember it's one day and it'll all too soon be over.

I am told you are my sunset child
The one who waits on the other side
with my Nan.
Sometimes I barely feel like a man
let alone a father
But for you I would chase down every shadow
I would light a candle
to remember.


I struggled as a child
life wasn’t always good
I know you are in better place
watching my face cry
as I write this
but I will try to replace the kisses
when we meet again
we will be father and son
and I will be your friend.

I begin where you end
I end where you begin

Mitosis of hearts
Joined from the start
God is a rainbow
and the white light
We are him and her
Every shade
together white and pure
in dreams and memories
In happy thoughts we pray for
Love and light is in us all.

In a twisting daydream
I caught your smile
In memories net
But now I keep it with all my regrets
Tragedy is as real as happiness
It marks us with its sting
My heart beats but it breaks within
The shadow of better days
That could have been had
If only I could have been more courageous
Outrageous.

I am the message, I inspire
set souls on fire.
A vestige of hope in days of darkness
I speak words of revolution
I can be the solution if you act now
so don't detract from the words I am saying
and the message given
which is driven home with concrete verbs and feeling
sealing the change for the future
I teach I nuture souls with love and not disdain
I heal the pain of the poor
but i shame the guilty with words fired like justice driven arrows
to make them atone for their sins
but I let them change themselves within
and their ways
I am the message
think feel me
absorb my words.

Eyes of fire
Sitting on a throne
Would you give me a heart to own?
Alone in a temple darkness seeds
The trees I cut down bleed their sap
Caught in the tragedy of existence
The curtain of the unknowing certain
I need a map
But the chaos of chemicals I can't control
Form my body, enslave my soul
For every negative thought I d fashion
10 for the good of me and my friends
But I can't play pretend the child I once was
Because fear is the adult he always was.

I am a white Labrador
I don’t like other types
I bark and I bark and I bite
I am a white human
I don’t like people of other shades
I load my gun and sharpen my blades
I am a husky I like to play
I tussle I hustle and bustle with other dogs all day
I am a human being
I see that we are all different but the same
blaming other people is a playground game
I am an alien we been through all these struggles
On our planet we recognise that variation is fun and not trouble
and variation is also causes beauty in strange ways
we don’t come to fight we come to observe your planets creatures
But we are light years away but we’d like to teach you.

To the man who says he can't
When he just won't
You play chess with the best of us
because we are your chess pieces
I know you know how to play checkers
But your life is a game of chess with us
It's the poor you game
and we run after you doing your ***** work
You act like you are not intelligent
But the fools do your bidding
Pawns in your game
Just you look like you are not playing
Doesn't mean your not...

In the catacombs
of an ancient burial site
guided by stars and the moon's pale light.
Lies the starlit angels tomb
In the gloom of a game of chess.
Deaths endgame
Guided them all to rest
Death and the devil played
Death always wins
His Graveyard game
They played for the souls of the angels
But the devil lost
Death's price was their souls
The devil was frozen in the frost of a frozen hell
To return one day to the earth
Under a different guise.

It's a full moon tonight

your clothes begin to feel tight

your heart beats faster

you feel like your headache's becoming a disaster

bones start to stretch and lengthen

muscles expand and strengthen

hairs stand on end

and begin to grow

then you begin to know something’s amiss

as you start on the first stages of metamorphosis

avarice and animal passions begin to take hold

your body begins to mould

into animal form and you begin to growl

a lustful howl

and roar a beastly roar

your clothes tear and rip

you drip with sweat

and forget your human ways

and become a beastly silhouette or shadow of your former self

your hands become paws

you fall onto all fours

your nose becomes a snout

a tail bursts from your lower back and begins to waggle

teeth become sharp

and canine as your clothes tear at the seams

animal body exposed

composed of human and wolf and well disposed

To hunt and prey on all who get in your way!

I am not the answer
To your prayers
But a man who cares
Is worth more than any acquaintance's blank stare
It's worth more than the fakery of an acquired smile
Than any piece of clothing diamond studded
Than all the tea in China cup you can drink
I am worth more than an expensive meal
A steal compared to people who rip you to shreds behind your back
A anti depressant without taking a pill
A person who will care for you when you are ill
and yet I am judged like a book with a cover that doesn't stand out
You won't even pick me up off the shelf
My life has high mountain highs
and precipice lows
and still you won't ask how's my day been
Cause your caught up in your own life
We've got two ears to listen to one mouth
That's an equation worth remembering
As my tears go south down my face
As I get lost in life's rat race
and lose my heart
like so many have before
So please knock on my door
Give me a bell
We all exist in our fragile shells.

The tyranny of indecision
all heart but no vision.
Utopia dies in dystopian eyes
the songbird cries.

Climate change not just a fable
Racism the successful execution of labels
Capitalism we can't eat from that table
Knives and forks hunger for meat
The poor die and retreat
Meat accounts for green house gasses
While **** distracts us with prosthetic *****
and **** hysteria hits
Drug taking and fits.

Work made us worker drones
Paying off our credit cards and homes
back to basics or what
Studying for didaleey squat
To be given student debt
Our qualification makes us regret
Not the learning
But the money we owe
Utopia where are you? I don't know!

I am a fork in a world of soup
a scout without a troop
a landline phone in a world of mobiles
a voicemail speed dial
a punchline which is a slow poke
a old bloke surrounded by stylish gits
a thong in a world of bras and ****
Facebook without the pictures
selfies at the right angle
a pen in a tangle
a stranger in a crowd
nuff said not loud
a cuppa tea in world of coffee
a defenceless toffee
in a world of chocolate biscuits
don't risk it or me
cause i am too different
a black sheep in a world of white
a short skirt in a world of jeans
a nghtmare in a world of dreams.
you may look
you may stare
but i am the unknown
you have to find me a home.

They call me human but all I see is the vampire
The taste of blood in my mouth makes me no liar
The fire in my soul burns flames which none can control
The dreadful burning and torture of my soul
Once I had a soul of an angel now doomed to eternal unrest
The demon inside is more than a pest
He comes with ravenous hunger for gods meat
What is holy must now retreat
I drink in christ's blood wine and devour salty bread flesh
See what is holy wasn't living on the death of a doomed god
Who's sacrifice I use to get into a heaven
What was good and holy was following his actions and words;
Love!
and yet
I regret all I have done
Love that should unite us and makes us one
It's the thing that keeps me here
But let's be clear everything is wrong
Backwards in this world of grief so strong.
Children are the only ones who truly understand
What it means to be inside heavens gates
This could have been heaven but maybe it's too late...

When Christmas and New Year's Day are finished
and you are tired and all your energy has diminished
When all you can do is creep into dreams
Of being in a new year
Yet having one toe dipped in the past
Sleep and dream of happiness that will last
Tomorrow's not going anywhere
The present is all we have
Yet we can make more memories of good times had
and they can live on with us
Good times to discuss
With our friends who we trust
So start new trends in the new year
Make new friends and lets be clear
But get some rest for now
Because you have worn yourself out
and yet the future is ours
For the taking
whether in dreams or reality we are making.

I almost loved you with all my heart
love enters then it starts
In the daydream of souls
In the pages of a diary
In the thoughts of a madman
A sad man from all his almosts
Love never surrenders
It is our ghost.

In the land of the blind
The one who can see with two eyes is called a madman
a freak.
They say it's better to see
But liars do preach
Teaching untruth through misconception
When your fed with lies
The more you eat the more you swallow.
We are one like the universe
We don't have to follow words that are hollow.

I feel a completeness in staring into your eyes
That I don't feel when I am alone
I grasp for meaning in a daydreaming world
My mind opens like an oyster
and you are my pearl
a beautiful agony unfurls
in missing you and your words
and touch.
I miss you so much
but I want wholeness
in my own skin
but it rings thin
because is it narcissism?
To look beyond the chasm
the void of our own soul
and yet romantic love is being in love
with what someone is that we haven't got
and yet we don't care a jot
for love is creation I care deeply and a lot
for what you have and what I haven't got.

You're gold?
Yeah gold plated
What's underneath your skin?
Abbreviated
Silence longing
Life sold cheap
You reap what you know
Selling yourself
Where is it getting your mental health?
To be a make up covered scar
Instead of a star
Chain smoking to fill your time
Life is lived through the eyes of grime
We are in your little band
Miserable we still don't understand
Life in conflict makes a good story
You tell yourself I don't want to be ordinary
Debt ridden though and poor
You're fighting your invisible war
and yet the people and the politicians don't care anymore
You tell yourself it'll get better
The glass half full to aspire
Lights your fire
are you burning bright
Or burning away

Open the door to your heart
A world without war
A new start
Where love and oneness are accepted more
Turn the page on your rage
Free us from the cage
Of the minds programming
Which is a failed system
****** utopia from the ashes
Of heart shaped gashes
Cuts that bleed
Feed love instead
Grow peace in your head
and like a Phoenix fly
From death
Take that one new breath
and think like you've had an epiphany
A realisation reborn into rebirth
Utopia on this earth.

The black

The hole in my soul aches
Waking from nightmares
hoping god will take them away
Madness the veil of midnight across all I see
Wanting to see actual reality
In amongst it all
The physical and mental wall
Has ring fenced me in
The pale emperor is king
He is the ghost of all my sin
Taken from me is my soul within?
His gnarled and twisted skin
religions faith is wretched
Stretched out of shape
I look to love but all I get is hate
But maybe if I get to write my own book
Fate will abandon its cruel story for me
If it's not too late...

Dopamine dreams
Scream escape.

Is it too late to confront and accept
The fears that have crept
Into this weeping mind?

I don't remember much of my childhood
Ignorance is blind
The adult doesn't mind
But my child self dreams of trauma
It's thorns burrowing in.
But where there are thorns
Roses can bloom
If I fight I can give happiness room to grow
For through knowing the lowest heartache
In the spectrum of pain
can the sunshine and rain
Nurture the roses of happiness and joy
Because the contrast will buoy the soul
and love dwells in the heart that has seen both joy and tears
and empathises both with people who know despair and joy
for there is truth in both sides
and their worlds sometimes collide.

Sitting in your old arm chair,
With a devil may care,
Attitude.
Talking about the ingratitude
Of youth.
Watching TV,
Eating microwaveable meals,
Grumpa,
I still love you,
I remember the times when I was young,
and you helped me,
when I was stung,
by a wasp,
or fell over.
Life is hard,
it makes you,
grumpy and
lonely,
Please think of the things you’ve shown me,
Rather than talking about the things that make you despair
I know behind the passive aggression you still care,
I know I sometimes take the ****,
But really Grumpa,
I can see all your tricks,
There is still, to my surprise,
magic behind those eyes,
And bedtime stories waiting to be read.
Grumpa,
Don’t lose the thread
We all need a grandfather like you,
For you have all the experience,
You will know what to do!

Behind the door of studio flat
Lies a man fighting.
Everyday a battle goes on in his head
But instead of giving up or giving in
He seeks adventure instead
He thinks life is seeking our truth
or the story behind the fact or fiction
He says life is not always what goes on in your own head
Life is a needle making a rich tapestry with a thread
Maybe it's affected by your heart more than your head
We all make it up in some way
From the sun to the light of day
From the moon to the shadows
From animals to insects
From rock to beach
Life is a movement a dance to teach
But in that dance we all play a part
Whispering thoughts across our words from our hearts
Born of lofty brains and souls
We all have roles
In the dance of life
Our heart beat is like a drum
Beating in a rhythm more complicated than drum and bass
Smiles are put across our face
When we realise we are as important as anyone
In the movement of the earth
The star dust made conscious
We walk around the place
We are faces lighting up
Drinking from the waters of realisation our cup
The universe made real
Each day this man feels the rhythm
The movement of life
Each day is a wondrous sight
Just to be alive
and it is gift
To be born and arrive into this existence or expanse
Life like he says is a dance...

Apocalypse redux
Interacting with our tear ducts.
We fly our flags
Until they are draped on our coffins
While weapons are tested by boffins
Sold to our enemies
Who fire them at us
While pop stars can only sing
Insipid love songs
What happened to protesting?
That's right we have give notice to the powers that be
The government which seems to control the BBC
So protests don't get reported
We are more interested in who gets deported
Than helping mankind
We bombed their countries to the brink of annihilation
Is there no room in our nihilism?
That is in our souls
We are more short sighted than moles
Love is only favouritism when we don't extend it to all of the human race
Compassion has died God cradles their face.

The shadow that never leaves
That breathes beneath my skin
Like I am paying penance for an unknown sin
The voice of the girl who I loved tears me down
Leaving me with histories frown
I come from the sixteen year old who suffered from psychosis
I didn't choose this
Does it mean that I am cursed?
Though the reaction is immersed in a painful ache
When I lay in bed awake
When I think of all I could have been
If not weighed down by all my regrets
I live in corner of nowheres ville
The words left unsaid still hurt
Sometimes I blurt them out when I am alone
To the voice that talks inside my head
Does she know how much it stings
To be king of nothing.

Woman, your beauty hides your brilliance
You have to be resilient
To survive in a world stolen by men
Even when you are the closest thing to god.
Woman, you are maligned
Hidden by religions veil
They tell the tale of Eve throughout time
The sinners tale
Original sin another story to enslave
Don't they know a mother's wisdom can save?
A man from falling fruitless from a tree
Hanging desperately.

You are a universe contained in a body
You are a theory
A thought
All you taught yourself
All you've written and said
That day you conquered your fear
The tear trickling off your chin
The skin and bone that held together
and yet the words that stayed with a friend
That picked them up off the floor in the end
You are a star in galaxy orbiting
A place inside my heart
The key to memories hidden from view
A hundred thousand moving pictures
The inspiration around a story
Your story begins
In a twinkle of smile that caught your fathers glance
The closeness of bodies that danced
wild and free
You are everything to me and more
and yet you think you are small
Stand tall my friend...

Intravenous agnostic
religious blood pumped into our veins
staining our blood with shame
love beats in our hearts
the same love that beats in other peoples
from housing estate to church steeple
we were born to love as one people
we are the universe
made conscious
our conscience is our conscious love
may look to the stars above
but we are as much born of the stars
as we are of the earth or Gaia
and anyone who says that you only go to heaven if you believe in jesus
is a liar no one can put out the star shine in our hearts
we are one just like the white light from the sun
just refracted into many like the rainbow
individuals feeling pain although
the pain is not knowing or feeling that oneness
with the universe our mother
our father yin and yang the clues are all around us
we may curse and cut
but we must trust in one another...

Give a bird hope
and she will sing
Even if she lives in hell
with the devil as her king.

When black is the new white
When the TV doesn't sell *****
When the stars go out in the heavens
When I win on the slot machine with lucky sevens
When money doesn't rule the world
When racism is no longer spoken
When mankind truly sees and is not broken
When we are one
Under one nation one Kingdom of love and of hope
It will be time to stop the clocks

We are the rainbow and white light
When we have learnt the deepest of wisdom
That our love is in our strength and unity.
and that all matter people, animals and creation
and everything on earth is alive and this is no practice no demonstration.
One life one God the universe which is us.

Television romance

In scripted dialogue
and camera click bait
is this our love story
or can heaven wait?
in the dreams of writers
will love be fore filled
if we become fighters
Will fate yield?
and will the type writer give us that happy ending
as the stage is set and then completed
Will we kiss and get married and die together or will we pretend
That love is merely written in our stars or will we have retreated
from that notion
that can be grown only come from a story we tell ourselves about each other
and that love and devotion
Is merely a set of complex conditions that come from one emotion.

My tea is lukewarm
My tone of voice forlorn
I would have a girl friend but I have sworn
I will be free
and I am too childish to bear any responsibility
My tv is five years old and doesn't have ultra HD
It also pains me it doesn't do 3D
My clothes have holes but they are not designer fashion
I have been told to spend so I do not save
I grow depraved
not being thankful
But that is what I have been taught
by advertising
So why is it surprising I am depressed and unhappy?
I definitely not a happy chappy
When my wifi doesn't work
When my cds are scratched
When my socks don't match
When it rains I am disgusted
The weather man is someone I trusted
and yet I live a life that others would **** for
Still I don't see further than my pants draw
I need more boxers
But come on who's eaten my chocolate stash
I am due a sugar rush and then I will crash.