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Don't say it
I can feel each word
Last time we had this conversation ,every word you said slit my veins
Felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest
So don't say them
Don't say you love me but as a friend
Don’t say you don’t want to loose me
Just don’t say it
Friend zone replies
Astral Jan 28
Hot breath warms her face
As it settles in thick blankets
Making it harder and harder to breathe.

The rest of her body feels chilly
As a fan circulates cold air around her,
But her face only grows warmer.

As she tells herself all the things she doesn't want to hear,
Yet would feel incomplete without,
The heat only begins to rise,
Swelling from her eyes,
Like thick globs of lava,
Crashing into the tightly held blankets.

She opens her mouth,
To tell herself to stop,
That she has no reason to be this upset,
That shes embarrassing herself,

But her throat fills with hot air,
And she lets out nothing,
Only sobs,
And hopes that tomorrow is a better day.
Aurora Jan 22
It was like a kid
Opening the gift
He waited for
For too long
Then found
An empty box
When I
Waited for too long
To be alone with you
Then you fell asleep
In my bed.
No cuddle and no sheets. Meh.
Reva Jan 17
you don't know

     how my heart shatters into pieces—

          earthquake ranging on every edge,
             my heart sinks; drowning in tidal waves,
                 it was thunderstorms striking my impulse.
                    emotions swirling like typhoon,
                        and tornado on every gasp,
                             this turns into a wild*******fire;

                                  I'd stare at those eyes for a mere second.
                                      next, I'm going to ask myself:
                                        are you sure?
                                      and as soon as I told myself no,
                                    I'd turn my back on you,
                             I can't

                       I never knew,
              that I set up my own natural disasters
        that kills me inside
every time I lay my eyes on you.
i'm starting to fall for you. and i'm questioning. . . how do i stop this?
Zaza Jan 17
Dear father,

I still remember the last time I saw you

It's funny, because you looked just the same as you always did
Like someone
Who was never really mine.

Like a stranger in disguise
Who's reality only exists
When I close my eyes and fantasize about you being in my life

But I guess
When you heard you should live your life without
You mistook that for my name

And I wonder if you will ever understand the pain
Of knowing someone only when you imagine them
Or loving someone who thought
Never talk to strangers
Was a lesson best learnt by example

But they say actions speak louder than words
And you became so consumed by your own self worth to really give a **** about who you hurt

So you became the expert
At manipulating words
Like turning
I love yous into sorrys
Tomorrows into yesterdays
Until it was safe to say I couldn't count on you

Dear father,

Because of you
I constantly found myself falling in love with things that could never love me back

I became infatuated with sandcastle and snowflakes

Addicted to temporary moments
Addicted to broken

Thought if I learnt to fix things
Then somehow
I might find the manuscript
To piecing the shattered part of my being whole again

Because of you
I spent years trying to cover this skin that you left me with
Tried decorating these scars
With tattooed hopes
To remind myself
That sometimes
Some things
Were made to last forever

Because of you,
For years I avoided looking into the mirror
Because I never truly knew
If you could love someone
You only ever met in passing

You see
I mistook your ***** for water
I never realised I was internally drowning in your poison
I thought I needed you to stay afloat

It took me a long time to realise
That ***** was just your way of relieving yourself from blame

You became a box full of things
I packed away the day you left
But I've stopped trying to hold on to your burden

So I've taken out my smile
And I'll wear it with pride

And Dear father,
Did you know
That if you repeat a word enough times
Then eventually the word will start to lose it's meaning?

And I've stopped wishing I was still young enough to understand
What the word father meant

And now no know
That if I ever see you again
Then you will look just the same as you always did

Like someone
who doesn't deserve to be mine
This is a spoken word piece I wrote for my father who disappeared like a **** in the wind. One I struggled to write. Full of things I've always wanted to say to him. One I am yet to read to him and now no longer feel the need to.
ᏦᏗᏖ Jan 1
You are now my history.
You made me smile.
You made me laugh.
I’m sorry to see you go.
I’m sorry we didn't have our moment.
I’m sorry we didn’t get the chance to try.
I want you to know that my feelings were confusing.
I want you to know I wasn’t really sure what they were.
I want you to know that they were there.
I hoped you would've told me you felt somewhat the same.
I hoped you would have stayed for longer.
I hoped that you had gotten closer.
That our conversations never ended.
I am not heartbroken.
I’m disappointed it didn't last long.
That the butterflies in my stomach didn’t continue to flutter.
I am happy I got the chance to meet you.
To experience your annoying sarcasm.
To get to know the soft side of you.
To get to be your friend.
But I’m not happy I couldn't be more.
The feelings we had for each other were there.
They were so radiant you could feel it through the phone.
I could feel your smile through the way you talked.
I’m sorry I’m your history and not your future.
Dredd Dec 2018
you are a distraction.
not just a normal distraction but a soul crushing, joyful yet disappointing distraction.
your smile hides a thousand lies.
your eyes cloud my immidiate thoughts.
your presence bring laughter and it brings tears to my eyes - not the good ones.
you are a distraction.

-an unhealthy one i might add.

Daniela Dec 2018
I stare at my blank notebook trying to put down the things my heart feels, only to realize I can't. This sadness,disappointment.. where and how do I begin?

My best moments were with you,always. How I wish we were there again. The flashbacks come and go like fireworks in the night. Ones when I was in your car looking up at the sky to look at birds. The one of us in the darkness of the night looking at the sea and stars...

To think I loved you for everything you were;for everything you are...
I became you in those days. I absorbed you like the rays from the sun. I lost myself to you,to be everything you needed. I was your shadow.
And like the shadow I stayed behind.

But seeing you slowly back away from me broke my heart to pieces. All the while I told myself I was okay, that I knew all along.
That it was too good to be true.
Frustrated I cursed at the wind and hoped that you somehow heard me. That you would feel what I feel. That you knew what true love looked like.

I see it clearly that you never deserved me.
Never loved me.
Never saw the real me.
You will NEVER see the adoration I had for you. And how I would've gave you the world on a platter in exchange for your sincerest love and affection.
And now you will not see not hear from me again. Exactly like the way it was in the beginning.
Black Lips Dec 2018
You laughed when I said that I was scared
You chuckled when I said you were my only hope
Now I'm writing on my own
There isn't much you can do
To save me because I'm gone
What did I do to deserve this?
The worst part
Is that the pain feels so good
I'm covered in blood
What did you do to make me who I am
Now go
Go back to the wasteland you came from
sara Dec 2018
I think the world is ending
and I really wish I didn’t.
There’s a rat under the floorboards
and a knife inside the kitchen,
and in the alley by the bins
a man there ******.

For the streets all smell of *****,
and this ******* indecision
has us riddled
in the middle
of our end and our beginning.

In the town a politician
with a jet black tongue
licks the seal on our decisions
without every truly listening
to anyone.
well done, Britain x
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