melanie 14h
Between blurred shots of tequila
During bright sunny afternoons,
That's when you see the truth of it:

The devil rises to the surface,
The bitter falls on the floor,
& the whimsical run amok.

& I stand, tipped sideways,
Watching my world burn.
Hiding, running,
What’s the difference?
I’m still avoiding the danger.

Missing the “thrill”
Of death’s hand
On my shoulder.

Missing the weight
Of impulsive decisions
On my head.

Facing the music is overrated
When there is a mute button
At hand.

Leave me alone.
Stop injecting me with your fire,
Turning my heart into a thunderstorm.

I don’t like rain,
I don’t run into the snow.
Let me sit in the sun.

Blood or none,
Stay far away.
You are nothing
But trouble to me.

You’re shadowed by toil,
Stop telling me I’ll love the pain.
I’m not going to take your hand,
And walk into the chaos.

I think with my head,
Not my sword.
So I’ll count the days until someone tells me,
You got yourself killed.
Bit weird, as usual.
Autmn T 6d
Doomsday nurses us from the start, reigning over the watchlist of our lifetimes. I walk through the destruction in my path while ignoring the hand I dealt in it. The disillusionment falls out of your mouth and I weep tears at the sight. The end of a cycle. I nutured you whole and watched the lilacs bloom from your scalp. Started as buds but with the passage of time became weeded. I thought I breathed new life but it stands as just obliteration.
Written during a realization that everything in my life is a product of my own actions and thoughts up to this point
You are a storm.
Off in the distance..
I can see the dark brooding clouds
The bright flashes of lightning
I can see the veil of rain..
But you are off in the distance..
I can't hear the thunder or feel it's rumble
I can't smell the rain as it hits the hot earth
I long for water in my desert..
But the winds take you elsewhere
You are a storm.
A wild force of nature
Beautiful in your chaos..
Your lightning may strike,
You can create fire.
Your rains may flood,
You can carve rivers.
But always..
Life thrives in the aftermath of your destruction.
You are an artist.
And I admire from the distance.
All I feel is rage
My skin hot to the touch
I'm getting angrier as time passes by
I don't know how to handle it
I'm controlling myself but my mind is chaotic
It's like poison it's taking over
I wanna give in
Maybe it's all in my head
But for hells sake it better stop
Maybe i'm the one feeding my anger
My hands are shaking
My breath uneven
I can feel it manifesting
I'm not happy
--I wrote this a few days ago I was angry with myself I suppose my anger manifested I couldn't control the anger that I felt I just was hot to the touch I felt as if I was suffocating with the people all around me--
written on:14/03/18
Within every man lies a beast of unascertained fury

A ghastly thing that roams the uncharted territory of one's own heart

It dwells there, a place with no morals, no consequence, no commitment

Waiting for the night's call,  when its prowess is summoned upon to indulge in the blood of chaos

At that moment man dies, The Beast will devour all...

                                             Bestial Thoughts(Explicit)

1. Hey, you're really cute / I am REally LIkinG YOuR BoDY, NIce THeighs, and those CUrves... would you be MInE so I can HEar you SCream my NAme.

2.Have fun guys don't be out too late ok/ Listen, Guy, if YoU HUrt my SIsTEr in ANy way I SWEar I will HuNT you down and TeAR you LiMb from limb and FUckINg crush your SKUll over and OVer again until there is NothING left.

3.  It's all good, I know you were joking/ You PIece of SHit, I trusted you and you're a FUcking SnAKe... I'm going to get BAck at you for this. I will HUmilaTe you and hurt you so you KNow the PAin I felt.

“I am a beast. But this is no fairytale. This—right here in front of you—is the real deal. I am a beast in size, a beast in looks, and a beast by nature. I am not a good man.”
― Jaimie Roberts, Scars
It can calm chaos
It can uproar bliss

Louder than thunder
Quieter than whisper

It can be mysterious yet so familiar
It blurs the lines between improbable and certain

I call it

Oh, I've been thinking
Mostly about this, about us.
Fate brought me here.
Chaos brought me here.

They are one of the same.
So as we are the same of both.
The mates of soul.
Through time
And its sheer
I see:
Chaos brought me here.

Through mental planes
Stuck in bliss disorderly
As the cookies inside
A grocery bag
Airborne and otherly
Like an odd reverse oracle,
I backsee through all the fear:
Chaos brought me here.

Ought not to be afraid now.
I used to be lost.
Amongst the Maelström I stood.
Not now. Not myself most.
Now's the time to not know how
To disappear-
And with my tear-hunting smile,
Bewitched by the longest lost peer
I see
What is only shown to the luckiest
Seer, I see:
Chaos brought me here.
Yet it's no longer within me.
Written when meeting someone new cured my depression. We're still together.
I heard a tale once
Of vapid medium matrix
And taut smiley convolutes

A tale which embarked me
At that time
Yet gave me no notion of its truer

You see
The ocean has no currents when you’re under

You see
You don’t see into your own eyes very often

You see

But the many yous that make a lifespan up
Can see you and make you see through

There is a tremblesome youngster in all of us
The one which makes crusaderies bearable
And laughter cramps quotidian gamblers

The breathtaken gasping-at-everything
Taken aback little idiot with the
Thunder in his belly
And the crawls below her skin
And the overhead waves
Evermore crashed within
Yes my meek teen rally
Once a half-contrived sin
Once my part bright moon
Of a solitary kin
Comes in all of us it seems

And we make up threads of social
For the fabric of our culture
That we start to weave adawn

Yet at dawn we are not there
With a full grown self aware

And at the solar peak of glare
We are still too young to care

Then at scarlet tap of dusk
Still a bit too tough to bare

Last at midnight we are gripped
With the fullest conscient gaze

So we can all marvel upon
How much oxygen we waste

In this marvellous endeavour

I think though it’s for the better
And I’ve slowly learned to praise
All the veiling in this system
Of Born
Then Raised
Then Very Dead

What I mean is there’s some Wise
In the grinds of our Ways
How Ethereum with potential
Gets palpable and cased

Because then we can all be
With the hardship of adult
And the vestige of a kid

And then we get to die
To get it over with…

But wait I still have something
A little more positive to say

Like the first person on Mars
Is likely still a kid
So when we get to Mars
We’ll still float in that kid

If you feel trapped in the smiley
And depressed and yesterdated
Version of yourself

It means you still have all
The other phases ahead

Yet it might not still be quite
As freely as you’re expecting
That your form will excavate
Through life’s cruel winding

Not all of us will get
To float our kid to Mars

Yes, you’ll get it All
Oh yes, you’ll get to try

But in the end, my friend
You’ll be glad you get to die.
If you think it's underlined by humour you're right!
Take yourself lightly, and this poem as well :)
awknight Mar 13
my chaos has been calmed 

by the pulse of your world.

you trace my pain and show
me its okay to be afraid

as long as the fear creates
something beautiful.
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