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Nicole Apr 24
Excitement pumped throughout my palms.
Sitting on the table,
I waited for a sign from you.
Hope lingered,
if only I would have known.

There was so much to look forward to
in this little room.
So many dreams to be had
by this small existence.
Only time would tell.

We held our breath
to hear our future.
Tears and anger followed.
There was no sign.
No sound.
No beat.
No life.

I’ll never forget the defeat
the denial
the devastation
the death.
You had barely just begun.
Now you will never be.

I felt it was my fault.
I could have done better.
I could have dreamed bigger.
I could have wished harder.
I could have…
done nothing.

I think about you often.
What would you look like?
What would you become?
Do you think of me too?
I’d like to think we’d be friends,
past the titles we were originally given,
but it will never be.

You left me that day.
It wasn’t your fault,
but I weep every year.
Understanding has never come.
My heart holds you still,
my joy.
GQ James Mar 15
This was very unexpected,
The pain is a pain I've never felt,
There's nothing easy about losing a child,
The moment I found out,
I was drowning in tears,
I've wanted a child since I was young,
I don't question his doings,
I just take it as a lesson as well as a blessing,
God has something bigger in store for us,

This broke my heart deeper than you can imagine,
I felt like my heart was taken out my chest,
My heart stopped for a moment,
I'm trying my best to keep it together,
But truth be told it ain't easy,
The holy spirit is what's keeping me sane,
Without my faith I'll go insane,
Outside I look good but inside I'm in pain,

There's no one to blame,
Life will never be the same,
Me and my wife went through this together,
We will get through this together,
One day we will try again but not anytime soon,
My pain so deep you can't see it,
Keep my emotions inside,

God gives his toughest battles,
To his strongest soldiers,
So the battle hasn't began to begin,
It's far from over,
We are soliders so will fight to end,
Children are in our future.
Nina May Feb 21
I wanted you to be real
I wanted you to be real
Like a fire on a cold evening

Glowing, a spark
For a moment
A short second here,
Now a while gone

I feel the emptiness inside me
Like you’ve taken my fire too
Frozen in my chest
I’m not ready to let go

Little thing I love
Little heart I loved
Like a butterfly’s wings,
one day we’ll meet again
I think sometimes
about the thing lost
inside that bar bathroom stall

And about the blood
that had flowed effortlessly
in brilliant, shiny-red globs.

I said goodbye then—
to the accident I never wanted
or even knew existed.
Maria Jan 28
Names are an integral component of our identities:
Differentiating us from others and signifying worth.
In a seemingly minute psychological attempt at comfort,
I’ve refused to extend the courtesy of using his preferred name.

He has stolen from my body and my mind.
In return, I have bestowed upon him a new name.
He ***** me in the fourth month of 2018;
I’ve taken to calling him April.

For being the smallest tool I’ve personally seen,
The aftermath was catastrophic.
April’s ***** should be labeled a weapon of mass destruction:
Dealing our ******, genital warts and an endless supply of nightmares.

As a giver of unwanted gifts,
April contributed *****
Fertilizing an egg
That resolved itself in a ****** mess on my aunt’s bathroom floor.

I still can’t quite grasp
How a miscarriage could provoke
Such simultaneous emotions
Of relief and devastation.

Three years later and I’m assembling my shards into something that resembles a whole.
I’m finally able to present one more name.
To the child that once occupied my womb:
You are Selah, a break in the singing.
Cole Strangeee Oct 2020
I was wondering along the cemetery my family is buried in.
My mom told my a few headstones down from my grandparents was a baby girl who died at one month and one day old. Named Rebecca. My heart stopped.
I thought of you.
My “freshman year of college” when we fell in love.
At the time we weren’t together, you loved Heather why should I have told you?
I was pregnant the first Christmas we faught, yelling in a target parking lot. I begged you to love me and you left me in the snow crying.
I wasn’t going to tell you.
At New Years you came to meet me- but it wasn’t me you wanted. You told me you loved me so you could **** me and leave me before midnight.
I remember kissing one of my best friends instead that night at midnight.
I told her that I thought I was pregnant. She kissed me and told me it would be okay.
I never got to meet you, I only got the greeting of your demise.
But I always felt you were a girl.
I was right with my instinct when I found out about your brother.
I just hope my little girl wherever you are, you are safe and happy. I asked Rebecca to stick around, I told her it’s okay if she wanted to follow me too.
Alienpoet Oct 2020
I am told you are my sunset child
The one who waits on the other side
with my Nan.
Sometimes I barely feel like a man
let alone a father
But for you I would chase down every shadow
I would light a candle
to remember.

I struggled as a child
life wasn’t always good
I know you are in better place
watching my face cry
as I write this
but I will try to replace the kisses
when we meet again
we will be father and son
and I will be your friend.
Cait Sep 2020
Hope in things Eternal
A Promise in your Life

Shock and Sorrow at your Loss

Joy in knowing Jesus
has conquered Death and the Grave
and nothing can take away
my Hope.
For my daughter, Esperanza Claire. Eternity will be all the sweeter because you are there.
Cait Sep 2020
Joy overwhelming met
with peace.
So many plans and prayers
were for your sake.
You were given resurrection life
and the chance to save millions of hearts,
but if all you did was change this <b>one</b>
you were worth it
and forever loved.

Heaven has never been clearer
or more sweet.
For my son, Peregrine Lazarus. You could not be more dear to me, and I cannot wait to meet you.
Cait Sep 2020
Met with death before your time
Waiting for heaven
For my son, Vespasian James. I eagerly await the day when I can hold you and never let you go.
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