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Betty Jul 2022
How many missing sons and daughters
buried with tears and a folded cloth
dead pride of a nation
how many banners raised in triumph
lowered to half mast by the grieving
in the name of patriotism's flag
a highly dangerous piece of rag
Maria May 2022
Here I sit at my office desk. I have a million things to do but I must prioritize the most important task of all, my life realizations.

I have contemplated on the recent loss of my three-year long relationship. That chapter of my life that I thought would go on forever lasted only 1,095 pages long.  However, this is not about my current failed relationship. This is about all the boys I’ve loved before, combined (wink).

When I first experienced love, I dove in headfirst. I had no safety gears, nor did I feel the need for any. Eight months later, I had my first heartbreak. My first real heartbreak. It was the most bitter taste that I’ve ever tasted, the darkest shade of blue my eyes have ever laid on and the saddest music my ears have ever heard. I was never the same after. Life never tasted the same after him.

(Red Flag: Manifested right from the start. High School Sweetheart “ex- girlfriend” who was not yet over him and apparently, he was not over with too. )

The next time I fell in love, I came prepared.  I had all the necessary gears and read all the manuals. Take your sweet time they say, build a foundation first, become friends before you jump into anything. I did all that. I took all the necessary steps for success and yup, you’ve guessed it, it failed. My second real heartbreak tasted even worse than my first. Everything I felt before were intensified.  I did not just lose a lover; I lost a friend. I felt my heart ache and it cracked a little bit more than it did the last time. The pain was greater than anything I’ve experienced before, so I had to move quick.

(Red Flag: Manifested in the middle of the relationship. Made a very big lie. )

The relationship that followed was a love from behind closed doors.  It was not as intense as the ones that came before it. I did not lose my grip on reality; I did not lose myself. In fact, I was so in my head that I had taken it for granted. This relationship was where “I ****** up”. My heart did not break because I broke his. I had no excuse for breaking his heart when all he did was love me.

(Red Flag: Wrong love, wrong time. )

And then came my  almost “End Game”.

I was single for a long time before I met him. I went into a lot of self-discoveries and made friends. I immersed myself in my career and became someone that I am a little bit proud of. I was ready when I met him. I was ripe, I needed to be picked. But our relationship did not start with any signs of sincerity. It was rushed, it was forced, it had no romance. I was warned about him before I even started catching feelings for him. But I was so ready. I let myself fall so deep. I ignored all the signs that pointed to the exit and kept running in his maze of love, lies, abuse & manipulation. I poured everything in my cup until it’s empty. Until I had nothing left. I used to visualize my future with him until I couldn’t see anything else but signs that point to the nearest exit. I thought this would break me, but it didn’t. I grieved the relationship while I was in it that I had nothing left to grieve about when I finally decided to leave.

(Red Flag: ****** human being since birth.)

So now we get to the bottom-line of all this abstract mess. The art of contemplation sure is a tricky one.

It does not matter how we decide to fall in love because when we love, we hurt. Love always comes with hurt as the day comes with night. So maybe there is no use in overthinking it because if someone’s intention is only to hurt you, remember that the devil comes in sheep clothing. Only time can reveal a person’s true intentions, so you just sit back, enjoy the ride, but listen. Look for the signs. The moment you recognize a red flag, respect and love yourself enough to choose yourself and walk away.

I know now that loving someone does not make them love you back enough to change their ways to make you happy. It is always
THEIR.
CHOICE.
Splashes of colour
I've never felt duller
Seeing through my rose-tinted glasses
I never saw the red flags
My heart now carries these heavy bags
My feelings torn to rags
Bright and red
I feel sick
Hit with a rose coloured brick
Red and bright
All flags insight
I squeeze my eyes tight
Wishing everything was alright
~4/5/21
softcomponent Oct 2020
"Curiosity killed the cat."                     

What this really means

is that,

at a certain point of investigation,

anyone

can become

manipulated

by

their

  own

      curiosity.
Toby Raines Oct 2020
Ignore the impending doom,
ignore the warning signs
Ignore the hateful glares
The flashing red lines
The labels beg to differ
Between everyone I meet
But still I feel myself simmer
In a vat of oiled up sheets
This escape room turns to hell
My every thought here to dwell
A bird inside a cage in a cell
I knew this could never turn out well
I thought you were good
but it’s clear that you’re not
If I wasn’t so kind
I’d leave you here to rot
You signed your fate
You’re to bleed under a rock
So won’t you please
Ignore my Warning Signs?
Krystal M Toney Sep 2020
I am the red flag
sprawled across your trembling limbs
when the world reminds you
that winter is also a season.

I am a reminder
that perfection exist
only in flawed visions
of how we see others
but refuse to see ourselves.

I'm the one you vent about
but refuse to listen to
because red flags
aren't viewed as imperfections
but as infractions;
Violations of laws
that neither of us agreed to
but live by.

Do you not see your own flags
boldly waving in the wind?
The way I stumble
beneath your force
or cringe
beneath your voice.

Do you talk about the way your flag
clings to it's pole?
Refusing to be pulled down?
Refusing to be burned?
An excerpt from a journal entry made on 9/18/2020. Currently dealing with my own flaws while quietly wondering if she notices her own...or even notices me.
Jenny Jun 2020
I’m tired of being treated the way he treats me
Through his looking glass, I am only an image of a limp retired doll
Something to turn on when he wants to pick at heartstrings,
Or to make me dance for him, my insides tied to his quick fingers
I'm addicted to the way he strokes me with his fingers,
The way he plays me as i sing, scream
with numbing pleasure, the kind you feel reverberate within your chest
But i know he doesn’t feel the same
He only grips me tight when he’s bored, wants entertainment, wants to feel wanted,
He only loves the taste of affection dripping from between my legs
because i give it without question
He knows that he’ll have someone to disappear into when he’s craving the touch of red silk
Or to play with until he becomes bored of yet another game
for him, I smile, I laugh, I act, im easy to manipulate, to use,
But to be used by him felt innocent, felt lightheaded, felt giddy,
The smiles from him were enough to make me feel that i was truly alive
So i listen with interest and concern without him ever doing the same for me
I allowed him into my head before i kissed his,
kept him in my heart before i invited him between my legs
Dreamed of his hands long before i held them
But that was my mistake
allowing someone who i knew couldn’t provide me the love i so desperately craved
that's the cycle we spun in, my smile only used to *** on,
my throat to swallow, and my voice to ask for more
Somewhere deep down, I knew he didn’t feel the chest palpations, he couldn't feel the sun dappled against his skin, didn't care when i tapped out my heartbeat on his chest, my fingers feeling nothing beneath them
And to realize that not only did he not feel these instincts,
But that he does not care about me the same way i care for him,
To realize that im just someone to inhale and exhale,
and return to only when he wants someone to listen and to hold him
But im bitter now, bitter at the sweet i used to be
Because i always give myself to people who don't see my value
And only see someone to use, to watercolor yellow for a while
While they disregard my many emotions, my art, my writings
I thought this time i got it right, but i swerved left yet again,
excusing his harm as a fixable flaw
I ignored all the waving red flags
My red silk used against me
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