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Emma 2d
I want to be above myself.

I want to be beyond myself.

I push off from the ground, one skip, two,

Desperation behind the grate of my sneakers scraping against the pavement,

And then it takes and I heave myself into the air, flying.

I am above the clouds, above the swirl and eddies of white condensation forming mountains, forming rivers, mimicking the ground below,

But still the pink stripe of the setting sun is higher,

Still the sun is higher.

Still immolation is beyond my reach,

And flight fails me as I fall back to the earth.
Liquid Bear Nov 17
Blinded by the light
of ephemeral satisfaction
I **** another part of me,
a sacrifice to the demon
of nervous starvation.

It's a circular game,
a dog chasing a tail
made of sugar and guilt,
hunger feeds on hunger
until I'm empty and full
of ghostly desperation.

I know I'm racing
towards an open grave,
a vacuum in my heart
and crumbles in my hands,
yet the lips of gluttony
are too juicy to forget.

Forgive me,
for I have fattened
my apathy
and thinned my hope,
now another grain
of shame
in the hourglass
of my destruction.
One of my nightmarish addictions and its effects.
Stephen S Nov 12
I remember well, the sunny days.
Dancing in the square.
The music, all the smells and sounds,
and you right with me there.

I remember when they came and said,
"The evil days have passed.
Now, we mark a new beginning,
A hope for peace at last."

There was much feasting on that very eve,
and an endless sea of smiles.
Yet somehow we failed to see demons,
that had been lurking all the while.

Suddenly, our freedom yanked,
like a blanket off the bed.
In its place an endless night,
and a wave of pain instead.

Now, I'm in the deepest place.
Cold and hungry, all alone.
Set free inside this prison,
That I get to call my own.
gracie Mar 4
he's a careless night drive, beautiful
but deadly, his laugh intoxicating
like plum wine, a smile masking
the scent of desperation.

I followed his tracks through the smoking
streets like a stray cat chasing
Moonlight, cursed with a curiosity
that’ll **** her in the end.

dazed, she dances with the devil
to the electric hum of city
lights that gorge on the
fragile glow of the stars.
If I'm on the mend
are you mad at me?
I can quit.
I choose you,
over most things.
I am
The Fool.
Are you conscious of what you want?
You confess all your want for me, and it's sweet,
but the important details are missing.
What do I do for you? What can I do for you?
Can you name one?
I thought not,
but that's okay,
you silly thing.
With so much passion coursing through his body
a spark of the unpredictable
shot out from his fingertips
Words he couldn't form with his lips
now took shape with each ****** of the pen
Few pieces of papers tore in agony
as each pages endured the abuse he so far believed in
Haunted..
traumatized by a past
and saddened
by an unexpected outcome of his own doings
he aggressively wrote a song about a hellish present
an awful unforgivable treatment
from a woman he thought was hope

He felt imprisoned
Everyday she'd remind him of the harsh reality he lived in
robbed him off his freedom
soon his own identity
his future
and left him to wallow up with regret
depression and insanity

This was his TRUTH
It was everything he had ever known
Ever learned
Ever taught
It was only natural to dream
For something different
Something Better
But the unfortunate
Seemed to have attached itself onto his shoulders
He became blinded with his desire to live
So afraid to die
He'd grown desperate
to breathe an air he longed to breathe

His truth however, was a LIE
A lie that broke hearts
A lie that brought doubts into the minds of children
A lie that placed families
under hateful eyes of scrutiny
Families not of his

The Truth he wrote
The truth he convinced himself to believe in
The Truth he kept singing to another woman
was given to him by a mother
A mother he'd forever love
A mother he'd never forget
A mother he'd learn to forgive
But no longer his home
no longer where his mind may run to
for a day's rest

He left as a grown man in search
of a new start
A new home
A new love

But came here as a child
Throwing tantrums
and lost counts
of the many more baffling demands
in need of a new playground
Here he could never find happiness
For the woman who bothered to take him in
Could never be who he wanted
She was not who he dreamed of
Through his eyes
He saw no thread of beauty
No future
But just an island mother
Imprisoned by a vast ocean of isolation
Here, he could never find happiness
What man could ever?
When his heart was already set for another
But despite of his animosity towards Mother Isle
Despite his lies
Of which distressed her families
With shame
Heartache
Stress
Challenging their island pride
Isolation was her peace and purity

He will come to know life as they had
her children will show him what it meant
to be part of an island family
Her children will teach him
what they were taught;
Her children will share his pain
his distress
considerate of his situation
A feeling of empathy, if not sympathy.

They'd stretch their boundaries for him
They'd bend their rules
Gave him privileges only her children
were entitled to have...
They'd do
Only what they were able
If it may ease his troubled mind

Last but not the least

Her children will
Protect
Her children will Defend
We will honor our Mother Isle
As any child would
Our own way

The Nauruan Way
All countries have their own set of problems, we (the locals of our own) learn to live with the imperfections of our homes. It just isn't fair, nor is it right, to enter a foreign land and demand your needs and wants to be met, and then curse other people's homes when they failed to meet your expectations. I wrote and posted this, feeling the need to do something for my homeland. Writing in poetry form is the best way to get these feelings out without violence. I write, longing for nothing but peace.
siinli Nov 7
I've taken sleeping pills
So I can close my eyes
And dream about you
So I can rest and sense your
presence next to me
So I can dream of what
we could be
So my mind can wonder
and find you
So I can hold your hand
and embrace you
I've taken sleeping pills
For this will be the closest
I'd get to you
Because us, being one
Is just a possibility
—i just love you, im going mad

siin.li
Anna Nov 3
I desperately ransack
Crumpled sheets and pillows
Hunting for you
At any time of day
As the sun glares at me
Shining rays of duty onto
My faded features
And bloodshot eyes

When I can't find you
Sparks bury under my skin
But when I turn
It's just the sunlight
Turning me into liquid wax
My eyes dissolve but
I don't care
They deserve to be punished

You're always out at night
I ring the bell so much
That I get tinnitus
But sacrificing my hearing
Is all for nothing
Because you leave my offering
Bleeding in its temple
The scornful *** you are

You want me to use pills
To hunt you down but
I won't satisfy your desires
I know you like a game
But your opponent
Is apathetic towards life
Your worst fear
How can you twist numbness?

So we intertwine
A symbiotic relationship
You need me to have you
To exist as an action
This brinkmanship
Might push me to the edge
But I can live on the brink
Can you?
Whenever I get anxious it's always super hard to sleep, and the desperation for sleep sometimes comes close to insanity. It also feels like a game that you can't win and your strategies become crazier and crazier.
shiv Oct 29
and ill give you
one last chance
to show you can love me
the way you would a fire

and ill let you be the arson
to whatever we are gasoline boy

if you know there is more to love
than burning me out of my body

than breaking apart my ribs
for a look beneath at my heart

you are as slick with desperation as you are love,
but i have only ever been hurt
and i do not intend to become another statistic
in another raging wildfire.
Sabika H Oct 24
I'm in an awkward state.

I forgot that in struggle, there's no fun,
in hustle you'll find no one,
in confusion there's no sun,
in depression there's no gun.

Pick up the **** phone
because I can't do this alone!
I'm desperate and sad to the bone.
I just want to make you happy,
make you at ease
pleased
with my state,
and then I'll focus on what I want
when no one else is at stake.

I will provide
I will provide
you with abundance and security -
I'll turn you into royalty
and I will explore
all the states I must endure
to make that a reality.
This is for my family.
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