I let you down
But you treat me like I’m the only person who can lift you up.

You told me that you hate yourself
And if I was honest with you

Sometime I hate you too
Not all of you, though...

Just this thing that’s pulled a veil over your eyes
Creating grey clouds in every blue sky

That’s wasting time entertaining fruit flies
Whilst feasting upon slowly rotting insides

These dark parts that have invaded
Now makes your soul cry...

I’ve never met someone so in need of insecticides

i used to be so happy
when you were here
but that has changed
cause now you aren‘t near

I'm falling
Slowly
Falling
Into a deep black space
Nothing there
No one cares
That i'm
Falling
Dying
Inside
I smile
It pains me
I can't speak
I can't
It hurts
So silent's
My last resort.

We are not dating
And how I wish we were but since we work together it is a big no-no.  
But how he held me last night was the way I had dreamed of.  
How he wrapped his huge arms around me and cuddled me in.  And how he said that I was perfect how I am.  
Small and he likes small girls.  
How he held my hand.  He just slow grabbed it and held it and I loved it.  
We are not dating and how I wish we were.  
Cause he is actually a guy I can see a future with.

she was gone

before i could even tell her,
that her voice was loud enough,
and the way she colored me
never matched anyone’s.

the missed years
and wasted sunsets
now sit across the table,
mocking me into submission.

there was a lot i could’ve done for her.
it now rests upon my shoulder,
they form like alien letters
and weigh like blood.

the legends are real,
listen - i know now.
there is nothing heavier
than bearing who you were everyday.

I'm writing a poem to my therapist
To tell her what I cant say.
To explain the emptiness that I feel,
The pain I feel everyday.

I'm writing a poem to my therapist
To tell her what I cant say.
To explain my hatred for myself,
The way that nothing feels okay.

I'm writing a poem to my therapist
To tell her what I cant say.
To explain my missing motivation,
The way I can't do anything any way.

I wrote a poem to my therapist
To tell her what I couldn't say.
To explain the twists of my mind,
The truth behind the facade I portray.

Am so angry
Because I know
I know am hurting him
And seeing him like that
Breaks me even more
But I can't
I have nothing else to do
I tried
Everything
But nothing works
He just wants more
And he deserves more
But I think am not the one for him
I don't feel the same way
I can't give him more
And the more I try to be there
He just hopes more
And I can't
And now am angry
Cause I can't do anything
Except act like I don't care
He needs to think
Am the bad guy
Because I am
I wish it was the other way around
So I wouldn't hurt him
But this isn't how it works
I know how he feels
Cause I feel the same way
For someone else
But it isn't the same
I know what's more important
Friendship over anything else
That's how it works