but how
can i crave your
touch when
i've never
felt it?

perhaps, you are
only in my mind,
but you are surely
destroying it.

we dream
impossible dreams,
hoping one day,
they'll come true,
but we are only greeted with
false expectations
and world's cruelty.

and for the first time
this morning,
as i saw my unwanted
reflection in the mirror,
i saw you in my eyes,
on my lips, on my collarbone,
you were all over my face,
your smile shining in my pupils,
your face forever in my mind.

*oh god, what have you done to me?

it was so easy to love you,
to adore every little bit of your
youthful soul and take bites
of your cherry heart.

it was so easy to give myself to you,
my whole body, forever marked
by your rough yet tender touch.

it was so easy to kiss you,
the edge of your mouth breathing
onto my tongue, getting drunk
on your taste.

but what wasn't easy,
was forgetting you,
forgetting how you used to call
me yours, how you used to kiss
my eyelids, reassuring me that
everything is going to be okay.

it wasn't easy trying not to call you
at 3 am in the morning,
whispering how much I adore
the sound of your velvet voice.

it wasn't easy deleting you from
my poisoned mind, where you
were the only poison,
my deadly sin.

it wasn't easy giving up on you,
because I thought you mattered
more than the stars and you
proved me wrong in the worst way.

i wish
i could travel
to the moon
and bring you
back a stone.

i wish
i could touch
the sky that
is coated with
uninviting,
thick clouds.

i wish
i could have
the courage
and whisper
in your ear
how much
i love you.

i wish
i could ask
someone
to push me
into you,
and our lips
would crash.

i wish
i could die
from a sudden death,
and gaze at people's
reactions.

i wish
i could go
all night
kissing,
loving you.

i wish
i could turn
you into my drug,
and so,
you would be my death.

maybe i won't
love you forever,
but i love you now,
and now seems like
a better choice, babe.

searching,
to be something
lovely to
someone
i don't know.

different colors,
different shapes,
around the colorful
center,
a center that always makes
her happy.
whether she likes
it or not.

but soon,
the colors and
the center will disappear,
and she will go back to
her old self and
her old life,
the one that she hates,
with her whole twisted heart.

i'm surrounded by
maybe‘s and
false hopes,
unreal possibilities of
me and you,
kissing on a roofop in new york,
while the sun is just
above the horizon,
the moon still in sight,
me, holding your cold hand,
warming it up with
the coldness of my soul,
and after a peaceful moment,
you'll shot a smile at me,
and it will be
the bullet that pierces
through my soul and
kills me greatly.

melancholy songs,
half empty double-deckers
and heavy raindrops
are the things that
remind me of you.

lie down,
little girl,
on this very bed,
where your lover,
broke his promise
numerous of times
without you
knowing.

unnoticeable lip balm,
on your soft lips,
lips that i just want
to touch with mine,
and do the calming
act again,
until i die.

now,
that your anger
has soothed down,
you are calm and
you have that guilty face
on you,
the one that you
always have,
when you know
you were wrong.
you're biting
your red, swollen lip,
and your repeated excuses,
i will not take anymore,
i have heard them too many times,
the tension in the air,
is telling us
that our time is
done,
for good.

all i want to do is
run my hands through your brown locks.

all i want to do is
kiss those cherry lips of yours.

all i want to do is
make you believe you are beautiful.

all i want to do is
make you mine.

and she talked and talked about him,
with fascination, amusement, joy, pride
and just a bit of longing,
as if he used to hold her hand
and now he doesn't,
as if he left before anyone
said goodbye and had
the chance for one last kiss.

i like the way
your blues sparkle
every time you laugh
and how that dimple
on your right cheek
appears whenever
you grin. i like the
way you run a
hand through your
blonde hair and how
you like to lick your
lips every once in a
while. i like the way
you manage to look
adorable and cool at
the same time. but i
don't like the way we
don't match, we don't
fit. i don't like the way
we come from completely
different worlds, worlds
that cannot even collide.
and i absolutely loathe
the way you make me
feel things i don't want
to feel right now, the
way you make me **happy.

warm tears
stain my cheeks,
begging for mercy
and a little blood.

your face is pale,
your lips dry,
but you still look perfect in
the moonlight.

you'll be my last breath,
the only reason for my death.