I try to write, cry, talk
this heaviness out but
it stays like
the scar on my knee
from my childhood

ever-present and
old
and hardly
faded
at
all
It still stays
My heart
I leave it closed
The chains around him
Are getting weaker
When they break up
The rain gets heavier.
Sarah Mann Jul 11
I see you around sometimes.
More often than not,
Beginning just before the sun sets
Hiding until dawn brings forth a new day.
I’m not quite sure I understand how
You make me feel as if I’ve lost my touch,
My tether to reality
Like the earth is threatening to open up
And swallow me whole
Or to cause everything I love to disappear.
Vanish into thin air, never to re-appear.
I used to be deathly afraid of those days.
Of the flashbacks
Of my overactive imagination.
That just kept running, with my mind
Somehow dragging very far behind.
I was scared.
I mean, who wouldn’t be?
Of course, don't be mistaken
There are those bright and sunny days.
Where I think I’ve overcome it in some ways.
And yet on an unsuspecting day
I will happen to fall flat on my face,
And everything feels out of control.
While the world spins too fast
For my brain to compute, and
I feel broken.
Like a record running on repeat.
Skipping and skipping.
Scared of letting go.
Terrified of moving on.
Am I stuck in this loveless mood?
In this gloomy wasteland
Where my heart feels heavy.  
I long to feel the sun
Shining on my face.
If not perhaps once again,
Just to chase away the
Darkness,
That I can’t seem to escape.
Written June 27, 2018.
Edited July 10, 2018.
Amanda Jul 7
I let you go to lift the heavy weight
But now I'm trapped by indecision
If I am so free without your chains
Why does my heart feel imprisoned?
mermaidinCLE Jul 5
when you
speak
my soul
shakes
your voice
trails
on my skin like
fingertips
and as the hours
tick
the earth
quakes
filled with words we only
think
somewhere the barrier
breaks
I felt it crumbling
I felt it falling with the rain
The invisible
I felt it falling
Bits and pieces
Shreds and ribbons
The clothing of my wings
As God unpacked the wraps with haste
Like an restless child
Tearing down the gift
Together with the wrapping

I felt it falling
Scorching on the skin
Of frail reveries
Soaking wet I felt the taste
Of gasoline
And drowned the rain
Into my eyelids
Raw meat on your silver plate.
Heavy fingers
caressing my bare flesh.
You cannot invite yourself
if you aren't welcome.
Then you used your
sticky, heavy and disgusting
thick fingers
to caress some more.
In my head  
broken people can only
create broken things.
So what if you created it  
you said while
everyone in the cinema
had melted hearts.
But this is no love story
more like horror.
For I would not bow
and you made me.
Kim Jun 27
Words sink
Like rocks
They weigh me down
Like guilt

I’m stuck
Sinking
Drowning

Can anybody hear me?

The truth is heavy
But sometimes
I must lift up weights
To be strong
Once again
elephants moved to
small red houses on both
of my shoulders and they
sing and sometimes scream

they invite the rain and just
drain all the breeze I have
on my mind

today they painted
the houses pastel blue and
they started to grow
with the raindrops

the water level is rising
as I am becoming smaller
under the weight of the
elephants

it can't end well
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