another november creeps in at the corners, and her omission of modesty has once again amazed me. the trees cry, golden tears that tesselate under my toes, cloaking the concrete in earthy hues that might fool you into thinking humanity had never touched this realm of benevolent bliss.
But it has, for this metropolis is full of foolery, of factories and fame,
all of which have obnoxiously trampled every square inch of the woodlands which once ran riot over the distant, deserted hills.
Mists of fine floods hang now, like a veil in the haze of a rainy wedding day.
There is thunder in the eyes of the untamed, the flesh and blood whose dwellings have been disturbed by savage, civilised society.
Your wife isn't carrying your baby, she's carrying mine.
She wanted me to marry her but I had to decline.
She didn't want tongues to wag about her being an ***** mother.
She was afraid of people's reactions, that's why she married you after becoming your lover.
She pushed her mother down the stairs because she's very mean.
She posted ***** pictures of me on Facebook, she's also obscene.
I'd had enough of her cruel behavior and I decided to dump her then and there.
When I learned she told you that you're the father, I had to tell you because it's unfair.
I can't let her do this to you, I can't and won't keep quiet.
You may not believe me and you may even want to fight.
When the baby is born, I'll tell you what you must do and it will be for the best.
You can prove that she's pulling the wool over your eyes with a DNA test.
I will gladly give her money for child support because it's my baby.
And when I tell you that you must have your marriage annulled, I don't mean maybe.
I met a woman
brutal in her mercy.
Her embrace was a clinch
to prevent hard blows.
She pulled me close to push me away.
Seeing my nakedness
she leant me a dream
of chainmail and shield.
Taking love from me she gave a reprieve
to a mind resigned to the slow death of feeling.
Ignoring my words she heard
my faint silent heartbeat and
understood that it was music
too quiet for the world to hear
and turned it up louder
than I could stand.
I wept in my deafness
as she danced.
In the lush green fields meeting the eye of a roaming man, feel I the heart of the beast and the song of the gentle trees.
Dream I with the blue sky in the splendour of life.
But then, I am torn from the enchantment like flesh from the screaming and terrified gazelle.
Disillusionment found I in the fires of the savanna, when the mother of North and South seeks the blood of the cub and cooks the unhatched egg.
Preying on the apex predator and the weak all at once.
Again in the storms and molten eruptions.
Again in famine and drought which kills the lone adolescent lion.
Hung on the scales of equilibrium, life and death play to win in a game neither fair or unjust.
And though I give it the name of black and white, it is all lost in the grey churning reality of being.
©Johan Nel 21:57 2019.01.16
To believe you hope and dream
But to know you cry and die
For fantasy is beauty and reality is cruelty
"How about the sexuality of I don't care."-Brendon Urie
I understand your taste for meat
But is your thirst for blood so cheap?
Your hunt so deep?
Your drop so steep?
So absent is your love for me?
You'd feast on your own family?
Throughout my whole life I was taught not to feel
Discouraging put downs had first spun this wheel
Later the numbness extended to violence
Inequity towards me was stuffed until silenced
This armor had left me with no wounds to heal
This type of existence proved no way to live
My walls were torn down by my wife and my kids
Sensing such weakness and seeking to profit
She sunk the knife deep into me and she lost it
With shoves from my daughter to anguish I slid.
A child gets the access to do the most damage
Her taking advantage of weakness was savage
The lies and deceiving had gone on for years
Once I could see that it brought me to tears
This wound that she made will take so long to bandage
'look at that madman'
says the ***** and her victim
'look at that madman'
says the intellectual in debt
'look at that madman'
says the activist with rigor
'look at that ******* madman'
i screamed with them
as i looked into the mirror
'you ******* madman;
persist and never wither!'
And you ask me,
Why I have painted
The world red
And I would have said:
Mind you I did not
Paint this world red
Someone just threw paint over my eyes once
And I haven't gotten it off yet
Hatred never stays one sided
And those who condemn others
For having it
Are the worst kind of hypocrite