I hear her whispering to me sweet, gentle words in my ear. I want her to reach out touch me, hold me, wrap her long spindly arms around me. To take away the strain it takes to breath. To tear away the persistent pain. The pain that rips through my thoughts like the crash and ferocity of a wave breaking on the shore. I want her to keep talking to me. She beckons me “Come here, let me help you.” She pulls me in as if she were doing everything to save me.
She might save me. If I follow her the way she wants, like the way I want to. As if I were a moth chasing a child holding a wildly moving flashlight. She might save me. The more she whispers to me. The more I crave her. The more the pain rises like it’s an elevator, shooting to the top of a skyscraper.
I might listen to her. I might follow her. I want to. I want to see her, go to her. I need to. I need her to take away my pain like she promises. A promise so strong two pinkies solidifying it would not be enough.
pouring all the water in the glass, till the glass starts spilling out everywhere this happens every time she drinks from it she's fully aware of it, but allows it to keep spilling wetting her shirt, the floor, and the table drops on her skin racing to the floor, trying to beat gravity
meanwhile they were in front, watching all of it wondering why she isn't doing anything to stop it second-hand embarrassment is what they felt for the fact that she can't simply drink a glass of water without spilling it all "what a mess" they thought
nobody wanted to be around that girl "stupid" and "strange" are words that were used to describe her because at such an older age, how can she not drink a glass of water? how can she not control herself? how does she not think about how uncomfortable it is for others to watch?
she knew what was happening, but continued to let it happen she watched as everyone judged her, but still kept on going is it inconsideration or self sabotage? she wanted to see if they would see past that but in the end, she realized that was what she was defined as
extra contents that are spilled out can be used against you, even by those you love the most when you least expect it
Yeah I don’t know how to quite explain it Why I do the things I do You wouldn’t believe me if I told you But it’s a whole mess up inside my head Some days I don’t wanna get out of bed I’m my worst critic Always being so cynical Sometimes it even gets physical
Inside I feel so dull Not pretty like a doll I’m no genius And I got a lot of missing pieces I can’t take a joke
And last time I spoke You might of taken it the wrong way But no blame on you I know it’s all on me
I try so hard to keep my emotions at bay But if you said “hey Tell me what your feeling” You might see what I’m concealing So don’t look too far You’ll just see scars
It’s a waste of your precious time Just ask me “how are you” So I can say I’m fine It’ll do.
I thought maybe I’d do it with suffocation But maybe electricity would be better I could make it look like a foolish mistake After all that’s what I am Who would care anyway? I always try to give But get dirt in return I’ve been crushed so many times I don’t wanna get up again Not this time Not for any of you You don't care.
I don't really give two ***** if you stay I don't really give two ***** if you go I'm just so depressed don't ya know?
I don't really give two ***** if you stay I don't really give two ***** if you go But either way, I still feel so alone
I normally don't feel depressed like ever but these couple of days I have been. Okay I know I say I am leaving, I am but Thursday will be my last day so just gonna post a few more poems than I will leave. Inspired by LILHUDDY Americas Sweetheart! Check it out! Also sorry for the cursing.
I can hear the blade cutting into my soul I wanna scream in pain Why do I do this? I ask myself But I don’t have the answer Should've known I was too messed up for you now look what I’ve done All I can do Is cut deeper and deeper Watch the blood trickling down my leg It’s everything I deserve I’d cut myself from this earth If I could
Gravity couldn’t hold you to me Staring at the thins walls that separate us I can’t hear you toss and turn I was naive to think we had it this time I embraced all your faults But you weren’t ready to hold mine