I quit this mediocrity called Life
This existence filled with paradoxes
This life which lacks any form of happiness
These days that are filled with suffering
I quit this depression that eats me
This sadness that has long plagued me
This hatred that drives my every day
This angst that hovers over my head
I quit this stupid blaming game
Where I never took an ounce of responsibility
Where I hide behind flawed reasoning
Where I let my flowery tongue do my dirty work
I quit this pursuit of temporary happiness
Where I let Chance give or take control of me
Where I blindly wait for fruitless promises
Where I let this unfair Life give me anxieties
I QUIT THIS STUPID GAME
I QUIT FROM EVERYTHING THAT CONTROLS ME
From now on I am master of my fate
I am the captain of my ship
I alone pursue what I want
and not let anything come by chance
I will take responsibility for my actions
and take all the blame for my iniquities
I will not let anxiety take hold of me
and free my mind from all negativity
I will give up the pursuit of false joy
and in exchange pursue true wisdom
That this life is not as complicated
as what I thought it was.
That this life is just a simple struggle
and will only yield to those who are strong
Strong in mind and heart
Those willing to recognize and accept all weaknesses
and to change and convert them to strength
Whoever sits upon Heaven's Throne
Give me the courage to resign from this "Life"
and give me the strength and will
To start the change that I always wanted in me
i want to write something people can resonate with.
for most of my life, i spent hours in book that i cried with or laughed to.
but now it is my turn.
i want to write for the ones with swollen hearts that are full of love,
i want to write something for the kids who were never enough,
for those spend hours sitting in the shower because the water frowns out the sounds of their tears,
i want to write something for the ones who have spent nights upon nights dreaming of ways to leave this world,
i want to write something for those finding bliss in baggies and hope in a pill
for the children who have found companionship in literary hero’s,
for the ones who twist words and rhymes,
the ones who for countless hours have manipulated vowel sounds and consonant endings.
i want to write for the ones who still believe in the magic of pixie dust,
for the ones who’s pixie dust only lives in hard bound books and in aisles of forgotten book stores.
i want to write something for those who appreciate the weird and find comfort in the uncommon.
i want to write for those fighting every day for that loaf of bread in the grocery store.
i want to write something people can resonate with.
because i’ve been there
so here it is,
here’s to you.
A sudden calmness
Overtakes my quiet chaos
I’m thrown into a world
Where no one knows my name,
Where I have no face
Stranger than a dream
But more normal than it seems;
Halo of lukewarm Moonlight,
Silver stars rippling across the sky
In my wildest nightmares
I could never have conceived
Of something too beautiful to believe;
A sudden break of of daylight,
Shadows evaporate from my mind,
Now all that’s left to hide me
Are the secrets they can’t find
Does it always have
to be the red balloon
When it should be
There are various colors
waiting, but ain't red
I hate the sluice of indigo
and sulfuric smell of purple
Not because of the lies
that lay ahead
It reminds me of the happiness
I lost in quadruple
I'll wonder if you miss us, that thought itself absurd
I'll wonder if the secrets I've told you since have been left unheard
I'll wonder if there is nothing, just blissful quiet sleep
I'll wonder if all your memories are still yours to keep
I'll wonder if I'll see you in more than just my dreams, that thought alone- sometimes- makes the pain less than it seems.
I wonder can you hear me, my laughter and my cries,
I wonder what happens when somebody dies.
So I'm sitting here, right?
Thinking of something to write.
It's not going very well, if I'm honest.
Like, I can't really think of something important to say...
Poems are meant to be poignant, though, aren't they?
Something worth time and effort, like a parable, or learning how to drive.
If you're interested, it hasn't been that long,
But I underestimated my own ability to shut down at will,
To run head first into dead-ends.
What is a poem, really?
That's not rhetorical, I am genuinely confused; my default state.
How many feet do I need in a line? I only have two to spare.
And if I give them away, how do I cross the finish line?
So I'm stressing over where to put the stresses
So my head's as blank as the verse in a Shakespeare play.
So I'm losing patience quickly, like a drunk doctor,
Or some similarly silly simile-slash-simulacrum,
Simulating the deepest of sympathies for myself.
Wait...Did I just do it? Did I just write a poem?
I think I did. I mean, I probably wasted your time in the process.
Sorry about that. Really, I am. How do I finish this?
Thanks for listening!
No, hold on! I can do this...
Have a nice day!
Ah, whatever. You get the point.
& yet it feels like a year.
faster than the roadrunner.
& yet it just feels right.
& yet i've never been more certain
of anyone or anything
in my life.
i thought i had something good, twice.
i thought i was completely sure, twice.
i thought i had found this, twice.
but here you are
proving me wrong.
proving that love doesn't have to be a fight.
it doesn't have to be a war to win.
it can be natural.
it can be beautiful.
it can be perfect the way it is.
simple. pure. true.
& i'm sure. certain. confident
я люблю тебя
All of a sudden, out of nowhere something came across the way.
Exactly what this something is,
it’s quite difficult to say.
As of now the present is on hold because of this something.
Difference of opinion leads to conflict of interest
Escalation in conflict leads to war
Always remember never forget the cause.
Go into details of each and everything,
follow the same.
Over a period of time it will be realized,
time and again cause is the only thing that not only remains the same, but is also important and hence in no way there is an escape.
Never forget that you are facing an odd
Never try to evade the same
Over a period of time it will be realized that odds make a way for many more new things in life that can not only be touched, sensed and felt, but those same things can be a part of life,
making an otherwise routine life very much interesting.