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And as I look upon my life
with some regret I have to say suppose could have done so much with my
life  
But because of depression
wasted so much of my youth shutting my self away from the outside world
Afraid to face the coming days tended to sleep away the daylight hours
come out after
dark
Got to point couldn't stand the light anymore would sleep daylight hours away
like a vampire only appearing during the dark
hours
Then before sunrise I would return back to bed
to sleep again away the coming daylight
then only to return
after the setting of the
sun come back to life with the other creatures of the night to walk like a vampire amongst the
dead
Memories of depression when young how It affecting my everyday life
as the night came wailing
in with absenteeism

the shadows of the drink
and the typewriter
were patiently waiting
for the shadow of my
presence to lay down
the next line on the
blank sheet of paper

but I was preoccupied with gamboling
at the resentment of the lethal routine,
murdering the sunlight hours of toil,
dizzy with the habitual gesture of
horrific and dreadful human behavior
and everything I looked at
drove me stark raving mad.

I’m a man of leisure…
leisurely avoiding man
in my citadel of seclusion and
the TV never was too good to me
either but the bathtub always was,
soaking in the eucalyptus
and my own filth
while the psychedelic doom
metal of Mars Red Sky
softly generated my psyche
and I struggle with the troubles
of concentrating and focusing
on one thing at a time
so currently I’m shuffling
between 3 interchangeable books:

The Stranger
The Studies in Pessimism
The Fear of Dreaming

there.
now you know
the sources of my inspiration
and the secret
to my success

the secret is
is that I have
no success

so what shall I write about tonight?

it’s probably best
not to know
until I get there

but my bet is leaning towards
alcoholism, drudgery,
misanthropy and
immortality

and maybe the painful
disbelief of emptiness
that impales my heart
like the tusks of a boar.

finally,
the peaceful night arrived
and detonated all over
creation

as I pour the bottle into the glass

as the fingers took a swan dive
into the little black keys

the last bit of my counteractive
disruption scrapes and dissevers
away slowly and easily
like tender meat.

o’ Chimera, o’ Chimera
don’t you ever let me rise
in the broad daylight again
heat and humidity hit
as I walk out the sliding doors
of the 7/11 cream soda in hand
I walk yawning across the asphalt
where water still pools from
summer showers
as I open the car door I
notice the haze of smog
and starlight and fluorescent
lamps and smell the gasoline
from the thousands of cars
that pass through
I close the door.
experience
Laine Viv May 2014
You never
told me
you were
a ghost,
Dear,
creeping into
my mind
at night.
In the Middle of the Night,
In the Middle of the Street,
In the Middle of Winter,
I stood there.

In the beginning of the day,
In the beginning of the year,
In the beginning of the storm,
I felt it.

When the breeze was picking up,
When the when the clouds covered the stars,
When the day was about to collapse,
I blanked.

I could feel the wind on my face,
I could hear the silence in the air,
I could see the darkness of the path,
I could feel the rhythm break.

I lost it for a second.
There was nothing.
I was too tired.
But the brain lingers on.

Trying to feed the anger,
Like a wolf getting ready for a hunt,
It scavenged through the night.
But the wind kept me at bay.

In the middle of the road,
With the cold wind brushing on my face.
I closed my eyes.
And thought of nothing.
Twitter's  night
  mode
provoke   me  for
night   fall.


Twitter's  ****
bird-ladies
affect  me
to  do  so.


Trees, clouds
know   that
i  am   still
a  boy  
not  man.


TO  BE  A  MAN
WHY  I  NEED
TO  ASK

partiality   doing
sea  and  it's

diversified
surface.


Twitter's  nightmode
sexify  me.


I  ****  to
beautiful  ladies
with   twitter's  night  mode.




You  can  say
me   mental  or
internet-addicted.


Birds,  wind
  support   me.

I  am  still
a  boy  not  man

to  be   a
serious    man.



  Why  i  will
require   to
ask
a  rat  and  cat
which  are  busy
to  save b each
other's life
by  killing.


Cat  is  hungry.

Rat  is  in   mode
to  save  it's  life.

I  ****  to
beautiful  beauties.

Twitter's  night-mode
provoke  me
for  night  fall.
Juhlhaus 21h
Sipping the air of a city night
So heady in the cold
On the move under static lights
Little universes about
To collide

Lone souls each
And all compose this Metropolis
Joy is to be
Discovered in insignificance
Where together
We belong
Three poets walked into a bar.
gabrielle 21h
when i was one...
on the pool of stars.
but all that human
can see
is a single star
that turns out to be me.

remember
when you are the moon
i've seen you again
after a long time
and in the pitch black sky

at last
we were together
the moon
and a star
finally, together

far still
but enough closer
for you to see me

i look up,
oh isn't that my love
just close to you
but won't ever
reach you
that only tiny shining star you see with the moon
it was my love getting closer to whom i love
but took a rest, a forever rest
and now it won;t reach it's destination
i sit in front on my grandfathers shop
where he collects and cuts his butchered meat
i patiently wait in the dusk of sunlight
soaking up the last droplets of summer heat
deep mountain woods grow with the darkness
as the scarlette sky turns to night
and the stars come out; and the crickets cry
i hold a rifle in my hand, but out of sight
my grandfathers cigarette smoke fills the air
cold steel laid softly, as i breath as little as i can
tomorrow i’ll be dreaming of this moment now
without any care, without any plans
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