My most dangerous trauma
Has the most gorgeous smile
How you haunt my dreams
That I never want to end
Your ghost lingers in my heart
And how it beats with joy and sorrow
My most beautiful trigger
Pull it, and let it go through me
You left a hole, a wound
Unforgettable in my waking moments
The scars that spelled love
Carved by mine's truly
I wish to heal one day
But I hold on to all of it 
I am not ready, I refuse to move
Erasing all the sadness and misery 
Would also mean erasing you

We met in coincidences—
Once in angst staring at the moon
Twice in silence glaring at the sun
Thrice under colored skies pretending not to watch.

Each time,
the universe held its breath.
Each time,
we let go too soon.

There were years between our names.
Other hands. Other homes.
Hearts that tried to forget
what never really left.

But I’ve learned—
what isn’t meant for you
will fight to leave.
And what is
will find its way back,
no map,
no warning,
just a pull.

So even if we part again,
even if time forgets our faces—
I’ll know:

'You are the return.
You are the thing that stays.'
Indefinitely


Erennwrites

Sail to me

across the ocean made from my tears—

formed by the hollow you left.

I built this sea for you,

so you'd always have a way back

to where we began.



Reach me

in the places I've buried deep,

the ones even I am afraid to name.

Trace the outlines I've hidden,

and show me I was never

so easily forgotten.



Tell me the story of us,

not through my memory's window—

but in the way you survived it,

in your truths,

the tender ones you held close

when night refused to let you rest,

and I was the ache you couldn't name.



Tell me I still live in your quiet.

Speak the moments I never saw—

where you paused,

where you turned away,

where you missed me

and never said.



Is there a portrait of me

hanging in the corners of your mind?

Paint memories with the palette of our love—

when no one was watching.

Use the colours we made together—

the rise of us,

blush pinks bleeding into amber light,

the bruised violet of our breaking.



Do you still hear me

in the hush between songs?

Do the lyrics still reflect us back at you?


Show me your wounds—

the ones left

when we unravelled

into strangers

who still knew each other too well.

Let me see the shape of your life

without me in it.

Come to me again—

on the tide of every tear I shed for you.

This ocean remembers.

It knows you

better than I do now.



Let it carry you

to the shoreline of our time,

where we loved once—

wild and unguarded,

a flame burning too brightly to last.



There,

we still exist—

untouched by time,

preserved in the hush

between wave and wind,

between what was

and what is now.

I'm meant to hold your hand--
the way it curls over mine with
such a tenderness that's enough
to make me smile and leak tears
onto the bundled scarf.

The wind sweeps them away,
I blink up at you and know
the warmth your smile pours--
liquid amber honey that
holds me steady in your gaze,
and yet--
this is a new place.

We have been here for days,
Rushing around on trains
and buses
and cabs
and subways
to all the places humanity treasures--
and I want to experience every moment
with You.

The culture in new places
always feels like a theoretical
until it's experienced...like an outline,
a sketch, a diagram even--
but diagrams don't reflect
the life in your eyes when
you quietly whisper a pun
while the tour guide is guiding
and I have to cover my mouth
or risk the ire of a librarian stare
from whomever might be offended
by a little burst of joy being born.

It started raining on the cobblestone
as we were walking to brunch,
but you brought an umbrella and
sheltered us from being soaked as
some less fortunates skittered through
the streets like animals seeking shelter...
but we are in no rush;
We enjoy the rain, the sound, the smell,
as it melts the scene that should be
painted in watercolor.

I don't imagine I would--
Or even that I could
forget all the little things.
I collect them like seashells or
shiny little rocks, and I
put them in my pockets and they
lift me up as if they weren't little
rocks at all but balloons
not letting my feet
ever touch the ground
floating forever
in this love we've found.

to my future lover,
to my future boy,
to my future love of my life and the like.

we haven't met yet,
and i'm not sure if we will,
but i'm willing to ask you a few questions of mine.

promise you'll be gentle?
promise you'll be kind?
promise you'll be loyal, mine and only mine?

i hope it's not too much,
i hope i'm not too much,
i hope you're okay with those requirements of mine,
i hope you're okay with holding me in your arms,
to drown,
to melt,
to snuggle in every inch of them.

please be gentle,
please be honest,
please be kind,
please be mine.

always, with undying love,
yours, sammy.

You are the warmth in the serenity I never drank,
the final page of a novel I hold off reading
just to stretch the story one more night.
You are the lullaby I hummed when I forgot the lyrics
but remember the ache.

I think I’ve been writing to you in everything—
in the way I halt at fullstops
Because I'm afraid
there's always an end from a beginning
I do not know the color of your eyes,
but I know how they’ll light up when you speak of things you love.
I haven’t felt your hand in mine,
but I know how I’ll memorize the curve of your thumb
like it’s punctuation—
a comma in the sentence of my life
that says: pause here. something beautiful is coming.

If you’re wondering,
yes—
I’ve saved you all the best lines.
The ones that never made it into poems
because they were too soft, too sacred, too soon.
They live folded in my chest
like notes passed under desks in classrooms of longing.
I don’t send them,
because I want to give them to you in person—
when we are older,
and ready,
and brave enough to admit we were always meant to find each other
in a world full of almosts.

And when you arrive—
with your quiet eyes and your laugh that tastes like home,
don’t be surprised if I cry.
Not because I am sad,
but because it is a kind of grief
to wait so long for a face you already loved
in every stranger that almost looked like you.

To you, whom I haven’t met yet—
come slowly,
but come.
This heart has been keeping time in poetry,
and every line
has always led me to you.


Erennwrites

And that was the last time
I let the world see me
Hear me
Begged for love

When the scent finally fades
From the pillows and covers
When I can't find strands of hair
On my clothes and carpet

When I redecorate the place
To fill empty spaces
When the profile is deleted
From all of the subscriptions

When I buy fewer groceries
Just to make meals for one
When I change the locks
Carrying the only key

When I stop checking
My phone and socials
When I stop saying goodnight
Because there's no good morning

When I stop hoping
For a dream long gone
When it finally hits me
Of how different life is

That's when I will realize
You are truly gone