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love was never so terrifying
til i met you

cause i never realized
how much i needed it

and now i cant let go
cingulomania: a strong desire to hold someone in your arms
D 6d
So long
Let’s call it a good night
I’m gonna miss you, babe
And I know
That after all this time
The faint memories from wine
You are divine
And it’s all you’ll ever be
Or so the fragments that make me speak

I need you
Even if it kills me
Maybe I’m drunk
Or I’m here going crazy
It’s all about you
It’s all about me
I need you in my lungs
Even if it kills me
I’ll die young
If it means
A life at your side

I don’t wanna lie
I’m blind, you’re divine
I see your face in the wine
I’m wasting your time
Trying to get to the bottom of the glass
Call it crass, or a little bit brash
It’s all for restoring that picture of you
Standing by me
Sitting atop the shelf or tv
I can’t get you out of my mind
No matter how much I know
All this is just a bind
And I’ll never leave
Even when you abandon me
Nights on the town
Just a little too loud
While I wait for you
Dead on my knees
To open the door
And set me free
Falling back in the groove
It was all never smooth
Just bickering between bouts of “love”
Or whatever you put
Between your hand and the glove

I’ll wait here
Through the rivers of *****
Waiting for you
Is all I can do
What’s there to lose
With another chance
Another dance like this
To keep it this way
Stay with me
Hear this plea
Because it’s all I can give you any more
I have dark secrets stashed in my heart.
Not idle gossip or an unknown fact.
This secret feels more like a ball and chain.
This freedom you have given feels like a prison.
Viridian Feb 8
I grasp onto the gasps and awe of some stranger
I do it all reckless, and so unafraid by this danger
I tango with the early hours and my own ***** mind
I beg for more from the phone screen I hide behind
I play with these loose holds and these unattached strings
I play with their pleasure, revel in the way they moan and sing
I validate my own worth through this self I display
I almost don't recognize the person on my mirror today
I spiral down a dark and never-ending abyss of grappling with addiction after addiction, vice after vice
I still remember
How you held
my hand
On your chest

I remember how you
Made me feel comfort
For my first time
With another

I asked you to take me
You asked if i was sure
I said yes
You obliged

Afterwards i didnt know
How to be
So i layed alone
Until you held me

Thank you
For making sure
I didn't feel

I'm not mad at you
Becuase i knew
I'm simply

To lose what i had
With you
I'm so insecure
But i can't be sincere

It was only
A hookup
I was warned
Many a time

Yet it happened again
So it left my mind
I want to keep you
Over the weekends

When they are over
You can go about
But you're being taken
From me

Like everyrhing else is
Why must she be here
She's ruining my get away
I don't like her

I'm sure that's wrong
It's becoming a blur
My mind hurts so much
I just want some companionship

Don't take it away from

This isnt very good but i wanted to let out some overwhelming thoughts ive been having for months that are getting so much worse
| the new age ******* |
that’s what my aunt carol calls it
| the new age ******* |
she says it sounds like;
“in quietness there’s truth”. some **** like that...
Desperate Acts
There’s nothing worse than a girl desperate for love:

A girl that pities herself enough to think she is so intrinsically broken
she couldn’t even connect with someone biologically destined to love her;
A girl ****** enough to learn that love is a reward that she must earn,
yet frantic enough to always work too hard for it;
A girl that overcompensates. Begs. Forces.
A girl that claims she ‘Doesn’t know what to do with love’
when it comes along, so that, naturally, she can smother it;
A girl who’s biggest fear is abandonment, yet is an expert on expecting too much;
A girl that’s waiting to be saved, but would tell you she doesn’t deserve it;
A girl that still obsesses over ways she has been bruised
when surrounded by people that have helped her heal;
A girl who’s self involved, with no sense of self;
A girl that cries. And cries. And cries.

There’s nothing worse than a girl desperate for love.
Latifah Jan 31
I was offended
when you accused me
of being desperate
but I guess it was true
I wouldn't have come to you
if I wasn't so desperate
to have a comforting soul
to have someone's arms
tightly wrapped around me
not letting me fall into pieces
so yes
I was desperate enough
to look for a shelter
for my aching heart
and homeless soul.
The first time I walked through the door of  a group of people.
I sat there  feeling. Alone not included.
Not one came over to ask me if they could help me.
Or just took a moment to say hello not seen you here before
. can I get you something
Pehaps a cuppa
Would make you feel  welcomed into strange  environment.
Only you know theses desperate times of  being alone at home.
Different  type of aloneness amongst strangers.
Deadwood Jawn Jan 17
Wanna help me?

Look at me with care.
Look at me with love.

Keep your arms around me.
Keep your proximity close.

Give me a kiss on the cheek.
It doesn't have to be weird.

Wanna help me?

Listen to what I say.
Tell me the feelings I describe.

Express your reactions.
Tell me you hurt for me.

Wanna help me?

Show me that you love me.



Please help me...
I didn't ask to be like this.. Or did I?.. I don't know.
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