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Repost:
~~~~~~~~~~
For me from my love for our children lala, sassy, coco:
I heat up, I can't cool down
You got me spinning
'Round and 'round
'Round and 'round and 'round it goes
Where it stops nobody knows
Every time you our darling kids call my name "Mom" Angel Mom"
every time I Mom you call
you sweetie pies lalasassicoco " P. a. t. r. k." papa too comes to mind.

Your names up high in the sky" Scarlet Letter " A" is seen A for Angel.. ine.
My rkrdd, heat up like a burning flame
Burning flame full of desire
Kiss me baby, let the fire get higher
Abra abracadabra
I wanna reach out and grab ya
Abra abracadabra
Abracadabra
You make me hot, you make me sigh
You make me laugh, you make me cry
Keep me burning for your love
With the touch of a velvet glove
Abra abracadabra
I wanna reach out and grab ya
Abra abracadabra
Abracadabra
I feel the magic in your caress
I feel magic when I touch your dress
Silk and satin, leather and lace
Black ******* with an angel's face
I see magic in your eyes
I hear the magic in your sighs
Just when I think I'm gonna get away
I hear those words that you always say
Abra abracadabra
I wanna reach out and grab ya
Abra abracadabra
Abracadabra
Every time you call my name
I heat up like a burning flame
Burning flame full of desire
Kiss me baby, let the fire get higher
Yeah, yeah
I heat up, I can't cool down
My situation goes 'round and 'round.
"Here I am, send me an Angel" to lay me down on a greenest grass,
In memory of his velvet canon
caressing my cheek
igniting those forest fires that forever burn
~~
By: Steven Haworth Miller.
https://youtu.be/ynaDdmoPOpU?si=siXjTZvCpekmT0tC
Cat 4d
I’m jealous of you.

You had more time,
More opportunities,
More time to be a kid,
And more time with your mom.
You won’t have to bury her
When you’re 23
Or plan her funeral.
You get to live life for yourself, uninterrupted;
Without the burden of trying to hold together your family.
Im happy you won’t experience this,
For a long while.
And while I don’t want to be,

I’m still jealous.
Looking in the rearview mirror
To a simpler time and place

Everything much clearer
A smile on every face

Peace, love and Innocence
So safe in mother's arms

A time when every thought made sense
Sheltered from the harm

Looking up each day
My vision filtered child

Buried life, now packed away
Once lived, recorded, filed
Some days I miss my youth.
B Feb 17
Lost childhood
a shattered snow globe on the floor
enchanting glitter and broken glass,
swirling in a mass, I find no cure.
Swept up the shards
that faintly jingled while being discarded
cut myself cleaning the mess
and it scared
a surface of me that must stay hardened.

So independent
I can live on my own
don't know what's best
but it's better unknown.
I am shaped the way you had me sculpted
I've got a sharpness deep inside
here's the woman that has resulted
from a young girl's need to hide.

Mom
I brought a portrait photo of you
with me to art class
the teacher said
I looked just the same
everyone always told me I was like my dad
I was so happy to be beautiful, that day.

and I know you've said you don't understand poetry
so I'll say it easy
I love you so much
I hope you don't hate me
for what I used to be.
Forgive the broken snow globes
I have already forgiven the memories.
unknown Feb 7
There was a night
Sitting in my room
Engulfed with pain
That old bedroom
With memories plastered on the walls
You sat next to me
Seeing the pain she had just put me through
You said to me
“It wasn’t your fault”
And i cried
Tears i’ve never cried before
Sadness
Anger
Relief someone saw it too
You held me
Ever so tight
Said you wouldnt let go
“It wasn’t your fault
It wasn’t your fault
It wasn’t your fault”
Made me scream it aloud
Until I knew it was true
You kept holding me while i cried
Thinking I’d always have you

You said it was all my fault
It’s not my fault you raised me this way
Your life
The ****** ways you grew
My life
Having to start anew
You blame me for the things I’ve learned from you
“Do what I say not as I do”
A ****** thing from the both of you
Tiptoeing around a line that was askew
Her teaching me things that will never be true
Lies from the mouths of people I knew
Reject
Neglect
Needs that would never be met
A million thoughts in my head
But only two that say what I wished I had said
*******
Ashley S Jan 20
The joy of my baby right before me
But I can't seem to feel it.

Loving husband on my side
But I can't seem to see it.

Precious friends with a lifeline
But I can't seem to grasp it.

A mist has settled all around
I must find my way through it.
N Pescador Jan 7
when i get sick
you're by my side
when i cry
your by my side
when i have troubles
you know the right words to say
when i have problems
you know the right words to say

but now
you're not by my side
when i am sick or when i cry
no one know the right words to say
when i have troubles or problems

i am not trying to be unfair or ungrateful
but i miss you
and right now
you is what i need
N Pescador Jan 3
Somewhere between then and now,
It went from “Mom, stop telling me what to do”
To “Mom, please tell me what to do”

Somewhere between then and now,
It went from “Mom, you don’t understand”
To “Mom, I don’t understand”

Somewhere between then and now,
It went from “Mom, stop asking so many questions”
To “Mom, I have so many questions”

Somewhere between then and now,
It went from “Mom, leave me alone”
To “Mom, never leave my side”

Somewhere between then and now,
I realized the other half of my heart was always
The person who created it
Lyrical Dream Dec 2023
I never felt loved. I remind myself it’s not because I wasn’t lovable, but because I was made to hate everyone who loved me and loathe everything I’ve ever loved. You had to purge me of love to assure you were its only source.

I looked for love in a golden page— learned quickly what it was to feel imprisoned by flesh-– learned quickly I’m meant to feel so tightly wound it’s as if  barbed wire snakes  my skin. I’ve yet to come undone. The serpent is starved for its prey and I let it swallow me whole.
I know I was born to listen— born to obey. The word “yes” was burned on my tongue from the moment I could speak it, recited like a scripture, scorched into my subconscious by a “saint’s” shallow sermon.

Love was never patient, nor was she kind. Love struck without warning. She consumed me whole as the serpent does and spit me out when she was full. To this day, I starve.

Love was pompous. I was nothing but she was the world. No pride of God could measure to that of the saint who loved me.

Love dishonored me with every slice from her tongue. Love was selfish. Love was rageful. She shattered with the lightest touch. She was wicked— a liar. She claimed to keep me safe but my fear of hell was nothing compared to my fear of her. I was the only thing love hated more than herself.

Love recited my wrongs more than my name.

Love says I’m a liar. She says I am cursed like her. Deep down, I think it’s true. Love was fruit grown from a poison vine. Deep down I know there’s cancer at my roots. Deep down I know I rot.

Love only wants me when I’m small. When I’m afraid. When I’m alone. When I’m malleable. Love loves me when she is the only thing I have to love.

The love I know is violent. She is brutal and unforgiving. Love killed me with her first touch.
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