My hand hesitates above the button "Unblock" Just millimeters away from my fingertips Pieces of your life could appear in seconds With just a little pressure Yes, I know last time this hurt me But maybe this time will be different What's one more time Just one more visit to your page Gently the button clicks and your name disappears I search it and easily find your page A lot has happened since I last checked And it's funny because Even though I'm reading them The poems themselves tell me nothing Like mine, theres no way to know Who it is you are speaking of Though every so often I read one that hits me in the gut It makes my heart hurt and my stomach curl Because I'm almost sure that The person you're writing of is me And you are still hurting You're still angry at me I want to like the poem I want to open a door for you to see So maybe I can help give you closure I'm itching for you to talk to me And as my finger Renters a state of hovering Over yet another virtual button I realize that it wouldn't help you I'd only be hurting you further And I don't want to do that to you I realize that my missing our friendship Is solely a desire of mine And it would be cruel To drop in on your life again I'm sorry for what I did And I'm sorry I'm struggling so much To let that piece of us go But your feelings about me are clear So even though it hurts to read Just how much I destroyed you I think it's just what I needed To stop getting my hopes up And to stop pressing your buttons
I wanna write about you. And I do. You drip off the end of my pen, Off the blinking line of my cursor, And fill up white space With the nebulousness of what you are to me; Your cumulonimbus formlessness. Enter. Pause. A moment of consideration. I am constantly unsure of what this all means. I love you. You’re bad for me. I might be bad for you in return. I want you. I don’t want anything and I burn for you, I write for you, I pine when I am a creature of pragmatism and action. You don’t want me the same in return, if you do at all. The absence of you is terrifying. The absence of you was a relief. With you I am elated. With you I feel as though you slowly pull my heart apart, As though you forcefeed me hope, For I am unable to do anything else but wish for— Change —when we are together, Though I know it is impossible, Unlikely enough to deserve the word. I can see the planes of your skin, feel Them beneath my fingers I can trace their lines with my mind’s Tongue. Wishing is pointless with you. I know this and still cry for the moon.
I wanna take your pain away. Make you feel everything is okay. Wipe your tears away; Every single day. Don't trip. Baby, I'm here to stay.
I don't need anything but your smile. That beautiful smile. That smile that can light up a room, no matter how dark. That smile that can brighten up a day, no matter the weather. The smile that can solve any problem, no matter how stark. The smile that can hold anybody down, without any tether.
I'm talking about the one that makes my pain go away. The one that makes me want to stay. The one I will never trade for anything. The one I know that when I have it, I have everything.
Baby, You have to know that these words are true. I don't ever want to be with nobody, but you. No backups, no fallbacks, no side boos. That smile is all I need from you.