I didn't realise
What a hardship it would be
Until I truly felt it
Heaving on my shoulders like a boulder

Brick by brick
I've built myself up
With words and phrases
That fit together

Brick by brick
I've built this wall
To keep myself safe
From harm and insults

The sunset
Bleached orange
And tinged with pink
The sunrise
Melted with red
And streaked with white

Green eyes glint
In the shadows of night
All-knowing
Ever-present
Behind the curtains
In the trees
The eyes of the painting
Following you wherever you go

If I could relive that moment
Redo
Do-Over
The moment that I lost you
I'd do it all over again
Same words
Different actions
Different words
Same actions

Open it, go on,
It's Pandora's Box,
Nothing bad will come of it,
I'm sure!

Nothing bad
You mutter
Nothing bad, I'm sure!

It's opening
Go on, take a peek
It's
*Open

I'm
All
Alone
And
There's
No one
Here
To
Help
Me

I always wondered
What it was like
To be someone else
Until I realised
It's fine to be me
Unique, singular, interesting
Different, flowing and free
All human
All me

I thought I knew
But you didn't, did you?
I guess not
No, of course
My conscience told me I didn't
I did, didn't I?
It puts me down
I do?
And lifts me up
Do I?
Yet, I can't stop it
Yes you can
I am you,
And you are me,
Together as one
I suppose we are
But it goes on
And on
And on

Clocks;
Ticking

Locks;
Clicking

Advice;
Taken

Leaves;
R­aked

The clocks
Are ticking

Tick, tick, ticking
Your life away

Your fate;
Chosen

Your death;
Imminent

Your breath
Stolen

Your heart rate;
Slowing

Your clock;
*Stopping

If I prefer the quiet
To the loud
Does that make me different?

If I prefer to write books
To mismatched texts
Does that make me different?

If I prefer to listen to rock bands
To pop bands
Does that make me different?

Yes.
It does.
And I'm glad.
*I don't want to be like them anyways.

Mummy
Why won't you bring me
Oh bring me home?
That vile red liquid
Makes you horrible
And mean

It always makes the shadows seem darker
More frightening
More real

This place is dark
This place is scary
This place is dank
This place isn't home
And the only person who can bring me home
Is you
But you're stuck,
Forever looking inside that Monster bottle of yours
And not at *me

The world is dull
Without you around
To speak vibrancy
And colour into it

I want to shrivel like a raisin
Curl up into a ball
From your rounded little basin (of friends)
Of all the torturers, you're the most cruel
I wish to stand up to you
But my knees are to bruised
For begging for forgiveness
And my lunch money too
But I can't and I shan't
And I never shall
As I'm the weak little girl
Bullied by *all

Not too long ago,
Facebook and Twitter and other Social Networks
All seemed a novelty
A truce amongst unimaginative
Teens and kids and adults too

Whatever happened
To romantic paper printed notes
The blotched ink that actually meant something

Now it is loveless postings
And fake marriages
And fake relationships

This is all thanks
To the brain-cell killing
'Media'

Butterfly Wings and
Bed Springs

Rollercoaster Rides and
Sea Tides

Music's playing and
Jumpers fraying

All the Queens and Kings and
All these little things

The kingdom of the brave!

Am I invisible
Or simply not there?

Am I invisible
Or simply not seen?

Am I invisible
Or simply ignored?

Am I invisible
Or simply hated?

Am I invisible
Or simply
     not
             liked
                   at
                      all

Wish upon a star;
Go on, fly away far;
Home is ever so lonely now;
Both painful and true;
You left, quite out of the blue;
My child, please come home;
I'll play all your favourite games;
Even the one in the frightful brown mud!
Cold and alone;
This house full of memories;
I want to go with you;
Oh, please take me away;
Aren't the tales real?
Pirates and Pan and Lost Boys too?

If Life is but a dream,
Then I wish to wake up
And live in the harsh truth
Of reality and pain

We want to be comfortable, cozy and confident
With who we are
We want to fit in
Like tetrical pieces, finding our place
We want society
To stop
Putting
Pressure
On
Us
We want to be ourselves
Our young, teenage selves
But society doesn't want that
**Don't they?

Everyone has those Edgar Allan Poe moments
When they sit depressingly
Thinking of the Death
That is around the corner
And all around them
They call them pessimistic
But in truth
They are just
*Simply lonely people that need to be loved

The Break of Light
The Break of Dawn
The steps we took to fight
Aren't we just childish pawns?

To throw away
In the break of light
And break of dawn
Silly wars, silly gifts

Of broken hearts
The Broken light
Of broken dawn

In the light
You're afraid of the shadows

But in the dark
You're afraid of yourself

Cuts and wounds and scratches
Set deep in your skin
They create little tracks
Like Daddy's motorbike on
That deathly moor

Cuts and wounds and scratches
Creating red blood
To swell to the surface
Like Daddy's body on
That deathly moor

Cuts and wounds and scratches
They are
Deep
Angry
Ugly crevices
On the map of your body

Cuts and wounds and scratches
Deep enough as crevices
To fall and sink into
Just like Daddy did on
That deathly moor

Fat globs
Hit the window
Trickle down the pipe
Watery and cold
Accompanied by wind
And the night
Perishable by the hot midnoon sunshine
Raindrops;
Forgiven for their fat, wet drips
Of cloud tears

You Left
Yet you didn't say goodbye
And we were left emerging
Confused

You Left
Yet didn't say goodbye
And we were left wondering
What we did wrong

Parents will warn;
Family will mourn;
Those friends who were lost;
To 'Stranger Danger'

But what they don't mention;
Are the Strangers;
Who don't mean any Danger;
The ones with a story;
Behind the scary looking scars;
And the bans from the bars;

But the pain;
The pain of being afraid;
Being ignored and spat upon;
Maybe you're the ones who are;
'Stranger Danger'

Fireworks are sure to pop, fizz, and bang
Drinks are sure to be passed around
Getting the happy people
Drunk
Jolly
And stupid

The New Year is sure to be good;
Resolutions are made
Never to be resolved
Promises are made to break

The last words of this Year will be
*Goodbye. It's been a great one

It's not quite this
And not quite that
Oh, a what a peculiar little
Thing
Let's see how it works,
Yes
We have to open it up,
Cut it open
Like an egg
So soft,
So fragile,
Oh look;
It bleeds.
It cries.
What a peculiar little thing.
Until tomorrow.

Light filters through the windows
Like a little moth
Or pretty butterfly

It floods the dawn
Drowning the hopeful and the tired
Like a cup of sweet tea

Light melts the doubt
Of the depressed
And the lonely

Light,
Beautiful in the daytime
Milky in the moonlight

Touch Upon My Insanity
She whispers
Into the white walls
Touch Upon My Insanity
She cries
To the men and women in white coats
Touch Upon My Insanity
She screams
At the white buckled jacket
Encasing her
In a never-ending repetition of
Touching Upon Insanity

Drip...

The ice melts and drips

Onto withered, frosty grass

Drip...

The ice falls onto

Dead flowers that have no hope

Of ever living again

Drip...

Fingers snapping off

Bits of the ice

That drips onto their thin gloves

Drip...

That sad little sound

That's feeble and painful

To hear after the Christmas parties

That

Drip...

With more fake pretences

Of over exaggerated happiness

And joy

Drip...

Drip...

Drip...

If I killed you
Would you prefer
A knife
Or gun?

It wouldn't matter
They'd both produce
Gushing blood
Red blood
The dark liquid that is inside you

You'd bleed
Cry tears
From the wound
That I made
I'd probably look back
And cry for you

But that's just my job
To ****
And to make others bleed

Dead bodies strewn across the forest floor
Like leaves on a lonely autumn day

Party for One;
Yes that's right;
One, not two;
Not even three!
You heard me,
Party for One,
People are a ton
To handle
In groups
All claustrophobic
And bustling
And so,
This is it,
Party for One.