I always wanted more for myself, wanted to be memorable, but now I barely remember most of my life. Sometimes, I consider who I am, study my reflection hard in the mirror contemplate whether it's really me and then ask if this is who I want to be. What a responsibility it is to carry this human flesh to the end and to act in favor of this restless, desirous mind for the entirety of a life. Most of the time, I hardly register my life and world around me and thus behave mindlessly, and now I'm realizing that time is more than a concept and that age will one day take me by the throat. I've tried so hard to figure myself out, but I suppose I should spend less time in my mind and more time taking up space in this body.
Dear old me I know how the future seems As if time has you wringing out every last drop Wondering if minutes spent are hours worth But here we are One crossroad after the other You've taken paths paved And those never walked You've breathed in clouded air And have gotten lost in the fog You have climbed mountains And descended valleys You've seen clear skies And cried with the rain You may never know what's next; not even I do But no matter where you think you'll go Every tunnel you'll collide with Always has a way through Forwards and onwards You'll make your way toward me And I'll keep walking too
The next wave will be better. If I just wait, if I resist the bait to join the others, if I deny the impulse to jump into right now, then I know there's a better wave beyond the horizon... The next wave will be better.