a ray of light in my eye and
the living Word on my lap
a cup of milk in his hands
and the look of a loving mother
gazing upon the essence of her son.

There is actually nothing more
Than this now,
This now, and this
Now.

In this now, there are
Three spiders
Buried in bone
Tiny ticking bombs, growing
Or perhaps not
– who is to say?


My doctor won't –
He’ll just tell funny stories
That feel like the jokes
Of the uncle, the one at the
Christmas table, with a stained shirt
And the ***** newspaper
Tucked in his bag.


The buried spiderbombs are there
Like a memory of biting into a lemon rind,
Just enough to remind

That all life ends.

That all life is just now
And now and
Now.

So. Here in the woods
Branches droop heavy and black with berries.
I pluck to gather them and make of my hands
Two cups from which saltwater spills.
The old and the new, the once and future,
Overlay on the thick pine stumps.
That which has passed is not yet gone.
Treelike we grow on the rotten bones of giants.
Only the rough tumult of life continues,
And abates, and continues.

Here on the holly branch the spines sharpen -
The red berries have not ripened from black.
Live pantries store blackberries still **** red,
Not yet sweet with concentrated sunshine.
I see snag tree skulls, the knothole eye sockets
Where woodpeckers find their mealy dinners
To feast on the beetles and worms –
Which shall in their turn one day feast on me.
So it goes, as it should be, as it will.

Again I stoop to pluck the fruit
And form two cups of my hands
From which juice flows like water.
The ocean licks the sweat from my skin
And I see a vision of the ancient woods
That will grow from seed tomorrow.
Hew my limbs in history, bury them in timber.
Let the barrow-mounds be a nursery
Where the thornbush harvest grows.

Acceptance is sweet,
But takes time
And is hard to achieve.
It cannot be worked on like a muscle;
Quantity is not the answer,
Time is.
Acceptance comes like a timid mouse,
Rather than like a herd of elephants.
Walk the journey,
Traverse the landscape,
Feel the sensations of emotions.
Be present.
Grief is a vital ingredient.
Embrace it with both hands, and
A warm heart.
It’s time for winter to thaw, and
Spring to have its way.
Feel the joy of new life,
Harness its power;
Acceptance is a force to be reckoned with.

walking down the road
steps on crunchy leaves

looking up and down
humming to myself

feel the chilly breeze
smell the autumn air

taking it all in
each step, each leaf, each day
before you realise

another seasons passed,
and it’s already May

Oh to be there!
In present right here
To live right now
Forget every other thing that makes you
crease your brow
To breathe in
And take this moment wholly pristine
To laugh or cry
But no pondering over past and future
with a sigh
To enjoy just this
with whatever does and doesn't exist
In present right here
Oh to be there!