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Lei Apr 28
Sitting beside my window
Holding my favorite pillow.
Staring at the stars,
Feeling the peace in the dark.

A book fell from my shelf,
Now I'm scaring myself.
Inside the darkness,
I'm not feeling any more emptiness.
its close to 2 am. can't sleep so i wrote this because im inside this neverending darkness.
mica Apr 28
"thinking about the future... it scares me,"


"because you're venturing out towards the unknown..."
brain rot
NK Apr 21
It feels like, I’m waiting on something,
But I don’t know what that “something” is
All the comfort that was I used to in the past,
Now, it seems to cease

Suddenly, it feels as if I’ve lost everything,
The next moment it feels as if I’m yet to earn it1
One thought makes me wanna let go of everything,
The other makes me wanna catch everything that is gone

One thought makes me wanna lose myself,
The other makes me wanna love myself
One thought makes me feel deserted2,
The other makes me wanna feel the bliss

One thought makes me wanna feel sad3,
The other makes me wanna rush to the happiness I want4
One thought makes me wanna die,
The other makes me wanna live my bestest life

One thought makes me feel alone,
The other thought makes me feel so lively
One thought makes me wanna bark it out,
The other makes me wanna duck in it

How could I go with what I feel?
This time, I look around, there’s nothing to heal,
All this time I feel like running away,
But, I swear, I no more want to conceal

                My brain is filled with something,
When I ask, it seems to be nothing
Apparently, there’s nothing in there,
But what I see with my closed eyes5 haunts me more than the reality

Seeing myself, crawling on blood
One thought makes me brave enough to endure
The other makes me coward enough to leave

“what’s all that?!” I always think,
I know these thoughts of mine will never sink
Seeing myself like that, the whole time makes me wanna wake up,
But the reality seems to be no different

It’s just the thorns which convert to words
The torture converts to action
The evil becomes mortal6
And the lucid7 becomes reality

1 feeling of losing something I never had; 2 feeling of having nothing left; 3 choose what the others want/make the wrong choice and be sad for the rest of my life; 4 choose what I want and be happy; 5 dreaming; 6 humans are the evil in reality and are mortal; 7 not real/imaginary
A bit of dicey thoughts, they are scary. So, here are some of my dicey thoughts
Hex Apr 12
On a night where no moon shines,
I lie and brood in my confines,
Nocturne's wolf has come to dine,
Gnashing canines with sharpened claws,
Over is night--devoured by the maw,
The wolf opens wide, an unhinged jaw,
I stare in awe, in saccharine fear,
A beastly roar is all I can hear,
Yet I feel no pain--Only a lonesome tear.

I open my eyes to a room bathed in black,
On the floor is a woman, in a dress of lilac,
She stands with a shiver, and turns me her back,
Dark hair covers cracked skin--porcelain but soft,
She stared at me gravely, shaking oft,
Then slowly she danced as I sat and watched,
She twirled, pranced, and spun, but once she botched,
Then she sat, knowing night had its victim notched,
The Ballet of Shadows had come to rest--
     --but not yet had my final test.

I slept again, and woke in the dark,
Now, there was a mirror, a saviour from stark,
Painted in white, it was fit for a monarch,
On top, a remark, a blackened skull,
My reflection itself, appearing so dulled,
My face was blank, and emotion was null,
My eyes were closed, but I could still see,
As I watched my smile twisting with glee,
Crimson nectar now leaking through teeth,

The mirror shell cracked, my nerves were wracked,
From the mirror I retreat, but with me it backed,
My instincts raced, my psyche attacked,
The me in the mirror began to convulse,
Quickening was the beat of my pulse,
Beating like drums, a rhythm repulsed,
Then it stopped, the mirror froze,
And off to sleep I began to doze,
Not before my mirror had one last prose,

One finger raised--be silent, mouth closed.
An experiment with dark and disturbing poetry. Let me know if you think you can decode this one.
g Mar 29
Driving 90 miles down the highway at 3am on a Tuesday
Hair flying in the backseat radio blasting at 30
the future is bleak
And the past is dreary
18 years old almost on the edge of 19
Emotions seem unbearable and other times weak
Nothing is ever alright I just sit in my room
and imagine myself grown over night
I cant pretend the future isn’t scary id be lying if I said that
I act a 1000 years my age no one understands that
I don’t know my purpose The search might take my lifetime
What happens when the lights go out ?  Am I in heaven ? Am I alright ?
To say I have worries is way over my head, anxiety creeps in while I’m laying in bed
Is it wrong to think I’m meant for more than this life ?
Think positive think positive I’m trying cant you see !
The more I think positive the more unfortunate I believe
Bailey Mar 17
When the daydream goes grey
And the white smile screams

Shaky fingers
Sweaty palms
Ice cold feet
Speeding pulse
Weak knees
Scary thoughts

Then the daydream leaves
To welcome me home
The spaces in between
Claim to be memory and dream
Though I can feel the walls around me
Things are not as they would seem

I fear college will **** me one day.
Perhaps for some dark reason,
unknown to me until
it's too late.

The people who love me
now reassure me,
later pat my lifeless back.
Y'all I cant even,
College is so scary
what if I make a mistake and i get in debt for the rest of my life?
Hex Feb 28
Depravity dines, corrupt calamity,

Twisting lines, vile virality,

Prophets scream and children listen,

Deceptions deem what we may christen,

"The world is dying--have they no morals?"

Eternally spying--I observe the laurels,

Gold that glistens, tightly weaved,

A blight of ricin, so slays the leaves,

The **** does not wither, it does not collapse,

With chill comes a shiver, consumed are the scraps,

"The world is dying--have they no charity?"

Eternally prying--At last, I have clarity,

The world, I had swore, may one day find peace,

The world, it's at war, a war that shan't cease,

Weapons need not, we fight with mind,

Nary a lulled thought, serenity is blind,

"The world is dying--can our home mend?"

Eternally trying--I can't stop the end.
A tale of humanity, and all that comes with it.
A sliver of skin rips from myself
I take the knife from the upper shelf
Skimming the blade through each skinny hair
The blood within mixes with the purified air

Drip drop down my white pale arm
From the look of it I enjoy much harm
Able to see clearly tons of hard bone
My heart is broken like pebbles from a stone

Tears fall down my colorless face
Unable to see the light between all this black space
Chopping away the person I am
Looking like a beet red Hannaford ham

Piles of memories splatter on the floor
Agony and loss block my bedroom door
All the pain I once contained
Is hopefully finally being drained

I lay upon my comfortable bed
And picture the horror that I just bled
It's cold within these shattered walls
My happiness feels so very small

I heavily walk to the bathroom sink
The mirror is melting just like ink
I stare at the person on the other side
She's just bone with little to no pride
This is a poem about suicide. I do not feel this way but sadly many do. It's supposed to show that when your done, it didn't improve anything.
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