I don't know if people will read this,
I don't know why I am writing this,
But I wish I could paint walls,
Spill colours on them,
I wish I can dance on water,
With the rhythm of it's waves,
And feel every beat of my heart,
I wish I could sleep on clouds,
Just beside that moon that shines every night and comforts me,
I wish I could roam here and there in the sea and play with any creature,
I wish I could build a house on island
And befriend those dolphins,
I wish I could fly and be free,
I wish I could cry when I see the sky,
I wish there was a world like that,
A world that would make me realise the reason of every beat and pulse of my heart, I wish .
I went to visit her yesterday...she had grown much beautiful and lively, her heavenly eyes, angelic voice, she is still the most beautiful girl I have ever seen... I told her I had to soothe my heart ache that has been spreading all over now.. she stayed silent and did not even mourn over my pain... she was standing right in front of me physically but I missed her.. it felt like she was not even there... the girl I loved and planned to cherish my whole life with... I felt helpless so I went home to drink the potion of off her pictures like I always did.. and like every other time, the potion covered the wounds but never healed them...
She left my heart scarred, my life discolored and my faith blemished.. despite everything, I have no complaints, no regrets and no worries,, cause my love for her is like a flowing river, that just knows to flow.
Tousle your blue rinsed hair,
I see you smirk in your waking sleep.
Can we prefer this over the things we left in bed?
Looking into the wardrobe mirror,
We saw fuchsia sunsets outside in the garden,
beyond the rusted gate,
I laugh while you flex for me,
Your v-lines stretch and deepen,
Whats your last name?
Lend you my purple sweater,
Come lie down love.
Black coffee steaming on the frozen window sill,
Steam creeping upwards,
Glass chilled from all the sapphire snow.
Outside what a dream,
Do you think we will still talk after?
Bathroom chats while you brush your teeth,
Listen to the drops of silence,
Orange light caressing your open neck,
Move in shadows out of and into dream
Mouth out words in fire
I don't know who I am in this,
Ontop or onbottom we don't care,
Swimming in the breaths of each other
Wish we could talk about it.
Haven't left bed yet,
Your green phone slips from your hand,
Wrestle on pillow and give up in kisses.
Imagine other people down on the street,
Give them names and stories,
deep in wanderlust,
Nothing can hurt you or me,
Blessed are the lovers who choose not to immediately see.
Julia led me here
To where I see the Hypnotic stare
Neck rolling open
My eyelids flutter to see
I’m standing in a train
Every seat filled with someone I've loved
Love in every corner
The carriage Windows flicker and whirr
No noise at all
The rattle of a journey unbound
Just earthquakes in my heart
I see him staring at me
The lights glare at me now
Stop and shine
He steps forward
Family and friends
Old loves and new
Armoured with fury
Grit and teeth
All in it to obey an unseen force
Deep within they
Grab my throat and arms
Press in their fingers
Twist their hold of my skin
Lock their legs against mine
Rip My clothes
Their jaws widening
Fallen stars in their fangs.
Force me to stand and listen
He moves closer
I try to break free
A Choir of Hurt in slow motion
Am I real?
Whose holding me?
I'm back and I'm dancing
Wonderland gone bust
Smell of alcohol replaces fear
The lights move back and the bass thumps
The track lifted and seats fall back
The train melts and becomes a dance floor
The glass coughs and walks by
Becomes an atonement in authenticity
The metal casing now wooden and flexing
the bar from before
I need to stop doing this
Remembering things that never happened
But I saw him here
There's a screen on the wall
It’s still playing out
Julia's swimming in the low tide.
Dancing in the seas spray.
Laughing at the spring moon.
Carries a conch shell and fools around.
The Sound drowns her.
Cracked lens films her.
Sunset in her sparkling old eyes
Just Out of sight.
Pink Luminous emotion.
Pale green ghosts.
Who am I?
Everyone ignores her.
Is this dreams colliding?
Caught in the crossfire.
All I had.
I need someone to hold me
From this trauma
That isn’t mine
That’s the trouble with dreaming of empathy
I collect crayons,
that I coloured eyes upon.
All where closed but I painted them
Death can only have you when you
shut those lids of sight open to life.
But when there vacant it comes instead.
I coloured there lids that were
closed tightly shut,
Why should I give it the fulfilment
when I have so much fun left.
I use blue, green & brown,
such pretty colours, I use hues of both.
Remember eyes are mirages
of not one but three.
But I don't want it to take you,
that treats for me.
I colour you in, ill open your eyes.
But death will never have you,
as only I can colour in your eyes.
Only I can paint those baubles of the soul,
only I can colour in what's left behind.
l'll colour you in, ill keep your eyes open wide.
even though your gone
ill keep your memory vividly alive.
All these years have passed and still nothing has changed,
So we have to march,
Against the abomination of colour segregation,
I'm just tired of all the lies I want to know what's real,
If I stand by your side will you show me the deal?
I’ve got the moon and the stars beneath my feet,
Will that be enough to free my speech?
Tried to climb peaks that were placed deliberately out of our reach,
They envy my life but I envy theirs,
Heaven looks great until you have to climb the stairs,
I capture my emotions in a liquor potion,
It's all good swimming with your tears in the ocean,
And if I can sleep tonight,
I'll let them know I wasn't afraid of the light,
Can you feel the fluttering inside?
Just come lay with me on my side,
And let's both watch the butterflies fly out of our eyes.
He skulks around late at night, all hollow
innocence to swallow, beast within burns
his fire - demonic Dorian Gray, an infinity
of void, reflecting through mirrors of lead
The blood is the lifeforce of the words, it flows
it's the rhythm that keeps on flowing, crimson --
Lifeforce within, flowing, like rivers in some
bastard babylon, baby, pregnancy of the earth boom boom
vampire bite, what a fright, burned eyes boo boo --
trapped in this zoo, man - caged beast, man.
Every man is a caged beast, controlled and
tied up, flawed creature, bashing head against the bars
and poets? They are the most flawed of all, dreaming of
escape, no hope, scraping the claws against the wall.
Red crimson lifeforce flows, big bang bachelors
drinking in noir nights, feeling the fright of the
big girls against the ceilings, their dreaming lips
which siren lust and sex, screaming in the night
siren. Bountiful boob, breasts.
Sirens of sex, burning in the night, hemp smoking in
the corner, drink more, smoke more, fuck more, feel more -
red - red - red - red
blood / blood / blood
Give it in, keep it burning in your veins, through the heart
that brain, it needs something to keep on ticking
like the grandfather clock, tick tock tick tock
feed your cock, red crimson moon, find a girl
treat her right, be tight with the devine
that feline moma won't wait around forever
so don't expect her too, just treat her right
be tight, and hold her in the night, out of sight
nebula dreams with your love, sozzled right.
Wasted and burnt by your eyes.
Seal her red within with your tears of divinity
and bleed for her too when you need to.
Red, like the colour of a rose,
or at least the bleeding of a moon.
Bada bing, bada boosh.
desert and abandon these
warm and sullen affects; upon you,
a wolf, thoughtful and reproachful as you
shook your snow at the starlight, and pondered
upon the mysteries of the pattering,
puddling, flowing liveliness of granite nothings…
and the turquoise faded into one horizon, the
other expanded outward, catching the humming of
the air, and the soft intake of the flowers…the green sloped
and shuddered through the lens of the hillside, and above,
the clouds shivered as you painted their likeness in the sky.