place your hand on my chest

can you feel the rustling?

the almost constant buzzing of the monster growing it's nest?

in moments of stillness I can feel it tunneling through my bones,

until it comes to rest inside my ribcage

waiting to hear it's name called again,

when it will flap it's wings in reply,

shedding feathers under my skin.

once it's awakened it will continue its endeavor

in pecking and pulling,

making more room for itself

and less room for me.

I'm supposed to wake up like flowers
and grow like vines
I fall asleep with eye-showers
and walk along blurry lines
I'm expected to stand tall like trees
and sprout wings and be free.
But silly old me
Doesn't understand being free.

Here's another one for you, my saplings ♥

she did not know where to go
feel the call of the wind that touches his wings
she is alone
no one expected it
they prefer butterflies
"is there a place for me?"
she asked a flower that she had come to
she felt uncomfortable being there
she felt it was not his place
if she had to die, she would
there was no hope for her

You are not the same little girl you once were.
You have changed.
You have grown.
You have matured.
A transformation.
A metamorphosis.
Nothing can hold you back.
Now spread your wings, darling.
And fly.

i sit in the shadows and think
of what it would be like to show my wings.

they flutter behind me gently,
casting flickers of light on the walls behind.

colors gently fade and twist,
and feathers lightly fall to the ground.

the room i stay in is dark.
it has thick walls to protect me.

every now and then, the floor will rumble,
causing cracks to appear.

but, they seem to fix themselves.
struggling never helps.

i have been told i am shameful.
i must hide away, not show myself.

no one knows of me, except for one.

she seems to be intent on keeping me here.
but,

i hear her crying herself to sleep.
i hear people yelling against my kind.
i feel the rumbling of my floor caused by her sobs.
i feel the pain of when she pulls my chains even tighter.

i want nothing more but to be free
to be by her side, floating near her
letting her be who she truly is.

i feel the loss of hope,
as my small room becomes darker and darker.
it's hard to breathe.

a small creature such as i,
wings of pink, purple, blue,
a robe with every color

it's hard to be one like me.

but i'll survive, until i can see the rainbow.

When we were together,
we took flight.
We discovered every inch
and every sight.
Under you wing
I feet secure
until one day
our flight had a detour.
Your fluttering wings
no longer fluttered with mine.
You floated away
and my wings began to decline.
I felt scissors slowly
cut against my back
causing me to fall
and my flight lost track.
My wings were gone
as I fell from the sky.
Losing my heart
and my ability to fly.

Don't let a person define you.

Give me a one-way ticket to Nowhere,
to be like a solitary, unique flower,
to see thousands of morning stars,
to be the longing's sweet desire.

Give me a one-way ticket to Anywhere,
my wings have forgotten how to fly,
for going back to my world in seconds,
the resignation will have to pass me by.

Give me a return ticket Anytime,
to give. Because I forgot to receive.
Am I in the clouds or on the ground?
I have loved and I love now, I believe.

Give me a return ticket Anyway,
I do not ask for me to be understood.
I do not want any self-consumption,
angels wouldn't care, but I would.

14.01.2018
London

Deemz Jan 13

I just want to be happy today
I don't care if this feeling doesn't last until tomorrow

I just want to grow a pair of wings
and fly with you

I just want to feel peace
lingering from my mind

I just want to inhale
something other than overthinking
and cold dry air.

Just how I felt about last night.
Deemz Jan 7

I bought myself a pair of wings
and convinced myself that I was now able to fly,
so I jumped off the tallest limit I've had set
in the first couple of seconds,
I felt free, in control and weightless
but then the weight of reality fell on me
and I was left on the ground
with a broken mind.

Kume Dec 2017

My wings dissolved into nothingness,

As I watched you slaughter forever after,

On a makeshift altar of unfounded faults
and salted mantras.

My mind is a haunted house of broken
fairy-tales and twisted portraits,

Of blissful futures that’ll never be.

Sometimes, only pain can gift you wisdom.

Where fences on hilltop ranches are low,

Even the wisest horse believes jumping over is freedom.

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