A beautiful mountain, white with snow
A light breeze, a wind ice cold
Frozen in time, I stare in awe
Under ice is a heart so raw
Diamonds glistening, ice shimmering
An imbalance of time and minds dancing
Beauty and despair frozen in ice
Waiting for summer sun to pay the price
Still and quiet, but the pain screams in your head
Frozen in place beside your bed
Staring into the pains
A hundred rocks flow through your veins
A thousand needles biting skin
Outward calm, but screaming within
Summer warmth approaching
Ice slowly melting, diamonds gleaming
With perseverance you break the ice
It falls, shattering, what a sacrifice
I watch as there is nothing I can do
As your body shed the ice encasing you
It is beauty and despair, intertwined
Dripping to the floor, Oh how I adore
To watch you come alive. An uproar!
No longer frozen, full of motion
As if watching a glistening ocean
You stand tall, high above us all
For you melted the ice, made it fall
Leaving only a memory
Your fight so strong, dauntlessly
Standing, living, believing, and yet...
Your feet are wet, so with regret
I must inform of icy returns
Gone are the days of summer sunburns
For ice will come, it will be done
Your body shunned from our warm sun
You will freeze again, be lost again
Icy diamonds will shine like back then
You must remain strong while waiting,
Frozen in time that is crippling
Shed your ice everyday, overcome
One day Summer will stay and all this will be done

The moon rises high in the sky
To the light of day we say goodbye
As the sun goes away
The wolf comes out to play
The man goes away
And the wolf comes out to play
A ***** of flesh it desires
A primal instinct it requires
It runs with the wind
On a hunt for those who have sinned
To eat their hearts full of mud
It's mouth dripping with dark red blood
Sharp teeth and ragged fur
Protection you cannot procure
To the light of day we say goodbye
As the moon rises high in the sky
The form of man goes away
So the wolf can come out to play

I crave
A touch
Not soft or gentle

I crave
A lust
So instrumental

I beg
For you
To grab me roughly

I beg
For you
To touch me toughly

I thirst
In need
For someone pressed against me

I thirst
In need
For Someone to hold me

I desire
To moan
Loudly with pleasure

I desire
To moan
Loudly - uncensored

I crave, I beg, I thirst, I desire a touch, a lust-loan.
You see, I am in dire need to moan.

She moved towards me like silk moves in a breeze. Her glow was soft, yet strikingly strong. Eyes brown and big like an oak tree in summer with rays of golden sun stung throughout. She moved as if an angel slowly awakening inside her. Her long brunette hair shimmered as it gracefully fell along her shoulders resting upon her *******. I would call her body smooth like softly blown waves in the sea, but no justice would it give to her. Her smile could make any woman stop in her tracks, just to appreciate the glorious happiness it brings. Her laugh brings joy like the peace nature brings in solitude. A total eclipse of winters cold, only allowing warm spring and summer. Hips a sailboat rocked by a beat only she could know. Sweet kisses with lips that taste like the most perfectly ripe fruit. Her hands touch as water does; politely gracing your skin and leaving you with droplets slowly fading. Her glance love-filled as a lover of many years might look at you. She is beauty from the inside out; she is graceful with every step; she is everything I want, and so much more.

Even when I'm simple you turn away,
I am sitting here telling you I'm not okay,
Turn your head from my cries if you’re mean,
These things I tell are something, they are keen,
Understand that you’re not there for me,
Paying bills is not the key,
I cry to you, of all I care,
So much I have had to bare,
No pity please, I want none,
But I'm not liking the shun,
You always disrespect my heart,
Irresponsibly shooting a missing dart,
Hello there, please remember me,
I need attention too, can't you see,
Denial fills you, in your mind,
Thinking you are so kind,
The love I feel, but not the attention
Is any of this comprehension
Listen to me, here me out,
Be there when I begin to cry out.

A dream once brought to me
Beautiful and sweet
Tender touches of love
Coexisting, together two bodies high above
Happiness and beauty wrapped around
We were tangle in it entirely bound
A dream once brought to me
Instead turned dark, how can this be?

A nightmare suddenly broke a tremendous light
A face above me now evil, causing much fright
Holding down my fight
Screams muffled by your hand so tight
Pressed against me without tender touches of light

Happiness and beauty no longer in sight
Instead held captive by chains of despair
I stare over my own body tortured, oh what fright
As demons grew around me laughing at my fear
Hard and unsettling with an ice cold heart
You pressed your hot skin to mine
It burned and welted, forever scarred
The nightmares end is lost without time

Shadows cast, screams stopped
Outside myself, scream inside, fight within
Nothing more to do, I laid still and watched
Done and gone, I think not
Replay upon replay, night after night
I dream of only what nightmares taught
And watch myself fight

Never winning over such despair
So sleep is my new found fear

Your touch gentle as a petal in the wind
Kisses soft as the morning sun rise
Slowly rising from the dust undisciplined
Bringing a comforting warmth to my thighs

Your smell familiar as a dream once dreamt
A sweet taste on lips kissing
Hands on my body gracefully you tempt
Long lasting moments of caressing

A love so kind, as a flowers tender touch
Leaves tumble outside tap tap tap as one
Tightly to you I clutch
Skin now hot like the risen sun

Burning the day in sweet harmony
Hips playing a perfect symphony

A scenic view of warmth and motion
A breeze swaying wild and free
Like a curling wave in the ocean
Holding on as an unripe fruit to a tree

A sunset slowly falling down
Releasing the day with a wink of light
Night settles on the ground
Your beauty is all I have in sight

Together we breathe in coexistence
Your touch more tender than anyone
Resting now with peace and silence
Calm night, for the day is done

1
Screams in the night,
Sleeping all day.
Yelps of pain,
And cries of anger.

****** torture,
Mind disruption,
Soul disappearance

Tears in the light
Screams in the night.

2
Terror through and through,
Scared thoughts of pain.
Living in sadness,
Then despair,

Life drained.
Dark appears.
Nothing left.

All taken and blue,
Terror through and through.

Addicted, I joke of my obsession
Obsessed? I laugh at it’s truth
Live life, move on, go on
It will come around, I know
One day this building will fall on top of me
Crumbling me under the rocks
But I am addicted to whats inside
I cannot let it go
The smell, the taste, the feel
Most of all.. The adrenaline.
It hits and holds, like a drug better than any other
No need for pills or syringes.
No smoke or bowl to pack
Just a mental addiction for physical pleasure
I cannot stop, I cannot stop, I cannot let go

It taunts us
It frightens us
Like darkness in day
Like shadows that slay
Swells of the ocean
Swells of a black potion
A true death
A true last breath
Murdered by aspiration
Murdered by suffocation
Your own creation
Your own demolition
Screaming loud to be heard
Screaming undeterred
There is a ray of light
There is sun in sight
Air is on the way
Air without delay
More than a word
More than what’s heard
Keep up the fight
Keep away fright
Shove darkness away
Shove death to obey
Breathe and climb up
Breathe to fill your cup
Joy is what we need
Joy will get us freed
Come on now
Come and bow
Only to the light
Only a continued fight
For it taunts us
For it frightens us
Don’t give up
Don’t give up
See the joy ahead
See it and darkness shed

Creeping crawling
Waiting stalking...
You sit there in wait
As if a planned date

Of which, I do not know
Why are you staring little crow?
You sit and watch beating hearts
'Til the harvest starts

I almost tune out the evil laugh
That you bellow from deep within your wrath
And almost forget where you reside
That is, within me, deep inside

Your jar of souls collected slowly
You take your time being unholy
You go into hibernation away from the watchful cavists
You do not mind though, for winters calm brings great Spring harvests

You feast and feast devouring bit by bit
You take piece by piece encouraging me to submit
Fighting the pain,
Fighting in vein...

Tearing me down, nonstop
As if I your crop
Little crow caws in joyous evil song
Release me from your grasp, I beg all night long

You come and go
And reap what I sow
Taking my strength and will to fight
Chomping down into flesh throughout the night

Released once more, you hide away again
I almost forget, but you have written it in permanent pen
You wrote "Never forget, sweet child, I am you keeper.
Sincerely,
The Soul Reaper."

No song explains it, no poems I’ve read
So I guess I must write one, to express what’s dead
He loves me, I am sure
But my soul does he adore?
He loves me as we are supposed to
The way they tell you when you say “I do”
Here is the thing though, I must express
We have fallen way too far, the subject I must press
A marriage once made for love has changed
Now a business partnership, tasks exchanged
I know between us love is there
But it’s a chore now, what despair
“I cannot live without you.”
He says to me, but “I can’t live with you.”
I scream in my head
My soul almost dead
I do not blame you, or who you are
I blame us both, for driving this far
I must confess I wish we could…
But we cannot, it’s no longer any good
We deserve better, we deserve love
Not the kind that we have, as it’s fading
But the kind with clear cut passion, no shading
It’s the rare, true, and scariest goal
To find someone to love your soul
My heart sings for you, and what we built
My soul cries out to me, filled with guilt
For I have neglected it’s thirst for a drink
You see, that is more important, I think
To follow your soul, fill it with its desires
To explore and find adventures, until it expires
I cannot miss out on another cry
For my soul needs fed or it will die
I tried to express, what I now confess
I tried to express, I even gave you my compass
Maybe you have a different map
Is it worth it to try? Or is it a trap?
I must go now, as my soul has a call
To live life, and experience it all!

Take me down to the river to scream
Where the fish are alive in the stream
Where the heart can loudly beat
There we are safe to take a seat
Resting our feet from the fire
We can clearly see our true desire
Let our screams cover it all in black
Do not hold anything back
We used to have silly little fears
But now we face true worldly scares
In a river with only so much water
Let us fill it with the fears we slaughter
In a storm or current that sweep us up
Screaming on to fill and fill, now keep it up
Let it out and release your cares
Let it out so we forget our fears
Move on and enjoy the sweet rush of water
As if nature our mother and we her daughter

Lion, Lion, Roaring loud
Wrapped his loved in shroud
With a crack in silence in the crowd
Hear the desperation he has vowed

Loss is stuck in perpetuation
Love gone, he suffers starvation
And it carries throughout all of creation
Come now, watch his imagination

Lion, Lion, crying despair
Listen and you will hear
The loved-ones voices he must bare
Listening with hope and begging in prayer

A land only nature has touched
A lion to its prey, clutched
Before that though
The Lion crept up real slow
Crouched down real low
He puts on a good show
Creeping and crawling
Absolutely stalking
His ***** orange coloring
Unseen by a prey so alluring
His big tufted paws are like a quiet breeze
Unheard by a prey totally at ease
His eyes focus, like a morning lotus
Finding the sun with such slowness
Silently stalking towards prey, not yet ferocious
A gleaming meaty meal ready to devour
Just another moment and little prey will cower
First a pounce with claws drawn out
Then a bite and a shake, making the prey shout
Now a *****!
Chewing prey up before its deceased
Drug across the land only nature has touched
A lion has won it’s hunt, quiet now, be hushed
Can you hear nature sing, the way she does
With violence and beauty no matter if lion or cheetahs
Now humans are different! Or is it really so?
The desire the same as a beasts hunt, reaping what we sow
A need to ***** and overpower
A craving to devour

A walk on the beach, calm and content
A slow stride with intent
Directions are clearly written
For the water tempts with graceful position
"Come to me, and take a swim
I will shelter you, please come on in
Little green speckled walker
I, the Ocean, call you son and daughter."
With a joyous pitter
And an excited patter
Water to toes,
Then feet, legs, and tummy, all the way to little turtle’s nose.
Protection and freedom within the ocean
A soft sweet lullaby motion

You drew me in, in that special way you do
Pulled into your space without resistance
A deer in headlights in total awe of you
Frozen and nervous, between us there is zero distance
Crashed into each other slowly like waves in the ocean
Beautiful and harsh, full of passion
Water to sand, meshing together in slow motion
Fierce with lust, and an undeniable connection
The sweet taste of your lips on mine
Makes butterflies swarm my whole body
Hidden nerves, corner kisses, crossing the line
We don’t mind, and it’s fun being naughty

So to you I raise my glass
Cheers for bringing me intoxication
A toast for every slap of my ***
A smile, for every bit of our infatuation

It sure is such a rarity
To have any kind of clarity
In this pall we’re covered with - no verity
Grey is not lit with any prosperity
Only shroud covered lands all in a form of familiarity
Knowing what is covered, but cannot see it’s true identity
Shadows cast through the day of skies so cloudy
A wet mist reminds - there is no remedy
Sunshine does not peek or wink through an atmosphere so gloomy
Dark grey grows over the land walked by one in singularity
Unfortunately, having clarity is such a rarity, a sad insincerity..

Sailing through storms, lost at sea
Two ship search for love, they plea
Lost in the unknown, two ships
But relief was found on your lips
Not knowing what we found
A love, or lust, or trust inbound?
Ships tethered together tightly
Surrounded by chaos, so unsightly
But your eyes like the ocean
Slowly swaying me, a beautiful motion
I didn’t know I was searching for you
I didn’t know what I could do
‘Til I found your touch
I couldn’t get enough, to you I clutch
Feelings of adoration, giving me inspiration
Appreciation so strong, my salvation
Chaos ensues over the sea
Two ships search for love, they plea
Untethered by contract made too long ago
One made before truth I didn’t then know
Longing for each other, but belonging to another
Should we even bother, to go undercover
Or brake free and together always be?
Tell me if you can, are we forever lost at sea?

If only you knew
What I really thought of you
My knight in shining armor
But now you just devour
It is like you eat my soul
******* the life as we go

Maybe you don’t realize
That you have left me paralyzed
Not by love, or infatuation
But by a soul disruption
Leaving me numb and blue
Suffocating, If only you knew

Do you see what you are doing?
Do you know where we are going?
Because I screamed it out nice and loud
I stand alone, but I’m going to find my crowd

Because you refused to let our souls live
We will wither away, nothing to give
I AM TELLING YOU I AM DYING
Do you hear me screaming?
I tried, but soon they’ll say “she died
Suffocated by a soulless life
So sad, she should have tried
Could have been so much more
Than a ‘perfect wife’" .. that's for sure

Do you see me now?
HERE I AM, I bow
Not in submission, NO
But to signal a dramatic completion
Of a play that is too long for the screens
A sad, sad play full of numb and blank scenes
You see, I am ending it now
so we can take our bow

You may choose to stand on stage for the end of time
But I will build my own Moulin Rouge with a bright sign
I will live life, and enjoy my ride
Goodbye goodbye, I officially resign

Water on my fingertips
Slowly it drips
Like watching leaves turn color
In the Autumn skies allure
Drops on the floor
Never as they once were before
Dripping from me, I wait
For time to pass, so innate
As ticks tocks and water drops
Play a familiar harmony
Heart pounding adds to the symphony
Like how the ocean sang and danced
As waves crash over the wet sand
Or the way birds chipped with buzzing bees
As the wind rustled the feathers of a thousand trees
Understand this beauty, holy matrimony
It is a perfect harmony
Hold on to the lyrics sung in the skies above
Listen and hold the music of truelove
Water drips from my fingertips
And all I do is watch it fall as my heart skips
For nature’s beautiful music is hidden
Taken from me as if I am forbidden
Forbidden to love or feel the peace given
It’s return I await, then all can be forgiven

You are sick
suddenly,
it hit you
like an unexpected enemy
and that's what it is
enemy
I like that word
for describing such pain caused
Attacking you
against you
trying to take you out
Enemy

love thy enemy?
God, how can I?
How can you?
What a terror
what a horrific thing to allow
I scream
in pain
how my Dad must want to scream
but he can't
for the enemy has weakened him
he has taken many blows
infirmary
doctors
tests and more tests
answers?
cures?
none.

Why Enemy? What did he do to you?
Nothing!!
he was kind to his body
so why do you attack it so
Enemy I hate you
if hate could bury you
if it could rip you out of his body
and make you ... disappear
Then hate would **** you for sure
I have enough to eradicate your tiny growth of existence
Your tiny bits causing so much despair

Enemy, I beg of you, don't take him from me

God, fight for me, I am too weak
take over, heal, destroy this terrible little vial growth
God please, I beg on my hands and knees
I plead, don't take my Daddy from me
don't ruin my heart by taking away one of the first people to love me in this world
God please, you gave him to me as Dad,
to love me like you do.
And he did, and he does, and forever will
I need his voice, his hugs, his everlasting comforting presence,
GOD!!
i scream...

Dissect me, tear me apart, take what you please and turn me to art. Poet, poet mind, poet soul. Write me like one of your poems old. My eyes green and my soul - a rainbow dull. Piece me together with words that flow. Break me apart to describe me as I grow. I want to see what others do. I want to read the thoughts of you. Poet, Dear Poet, write me please. What I ask is not a simple act; I know it won’t come with ease.

Sincerely,
Me

It is when you are corrupted that it is most difficult to go back, but falling out of innocence is easy. It's as if you could laugh you way from sweet to greed. Just step on down to the *****, wet ground. When your knees hit the floor and you want to stand back up, that will be the moment you realize just how hard it is to climb out. Climb out of the mud that coats your body. The mud that you dismissed as it filled your lungs and spewed from your mouth with every word you spoke. It felt good and easy sliding down into a puddle of muck. Now try to stand up. Try to wipe your greed soaked clothes dry. It's difficult coming back to innocence when you fall so deep into ignorance.

How can this be
Is it just who I am, is it me?
How can this be?

Questions are lined up
Spinning my head around
Answers nowhere to be found

How do I still crave
To walk into the oldest of caves
The one that whispers inside

How do I still want more
When I have everything I could possibly adore
How and why? Is this just a part of my core?

Wild and free ain't all it sounds to be
I don't want wild, I just want set free
From this taunting voice inside of me

Begging to be fed
And I want it as heavy as lead
But I hide it under the bed

Should I indulge again
Or, sweep it under the rug
Head up, eyes forward
Don't move, stand strong
Hold on to what you have

But the silence is so loud
My heart can't be proud

Turn it off turn it off
Make it stop calling out to me

How can it be?
That I still crave
What lies within that cave

My momma taught me to be early at the airport
She taught me how to prepare for court
How to dress for an interview
And to pay bills before they’re due
I learned a lot from her
The list goes on for sure
How to throw a punch
And to always pack a lunch
Organize and keep your stuff clean
Carry with you anything you might need
My momma taught me to have passion
Also when to fold and cash in
Good things here and there
Small bits when she was able to care
Most importantly though
I learned emotions not to show
How to care for a grown adult
And how to hide emotional assault
How to duck under an object thrown
I learned to grow up on my own
She taught me much and taught me well
How to let go of heaven and live in hell
To follow all her commands
To believe her words and mental scams
My momma taught me to go numb
God forbid I let my anger come
I had to let words fly by and disappear
Bite my tongue and always stay clear
Of the things thrown or words yelled
I couldn’t be me so my feelings I shelled
Closed up and shut down, I bow
My momma taught me how

I am grateful for what I’ve learned
To let go of everything I yearned
Nothing for me, myself, or I
I crave attention now, I wonder why?
I am searching to be a Queen
Not to rule, I just want to be seen
Look at me and what I can do
See me, hear me and I’ll show you
What I know and how I learned
Understand me for I have yearned
To be supported and guided through
If only back then a way out I knew
If only I had gotten out before
A successful life I could adore
A peaceful mind without scare
I could actually feel and care
Instead I am numb and closed down
I am being held until I drowne
Suffocated by my past
Pain that continues to last
Through adulthood and life
It affects me now a mom and wife
I am broken because of you
Because of everything I learned to do
I had to let words fly by and disappear
Bite my tongue and always stay clear
Of the things thrown or words yelled
I couldn’t be me so my feelings I shelled
Closed up and shut down, I bow
Because my momma taught me how

If I could tell you what I really think
Would you take a drink?
Of my thoughts and passion
Could you have compassion?
If only you knew what went on in here
My head is spinning, I have to go, but where?
Where to or where form am I running?
This event won't stop it keeps returning
This is never ending, am I misbehaving?
I am stuck in a cyclone full of this craving
How to get out, I do not know
Maybe I can stay, and reap what I sow
My thoughts are a mess! maybe only to you?
Because I know what I’d like to do
Is it worth the judgement or deceit?
Can I hid it away, under my bed sheet
Where only I can see the truth at my feet?
If it could stay there, forever hidden and complete
Then I would indulge in the thoughts you cannot hear
The ones deep within me I know you cannot bare
It makes sense to me, I understand it now
All the questions you have, what why, and how?
I don’t want to answer, you will not understand
How I crave what I do! Or where I stand
We all have secrets, yes you too!
Ones that hurt people if only they knew
So do I tell you the thoughts that I think
Would you really like to take a drink?

Oh my sweet demon how I adore you so
We have ridden together many years
Your whispers comfort me when I’m low
You create and extinguish all my fears

You bring me the anxiety that’s grown closely
To my racing heart and dark mind
You bring me the shadows I love so dearly
Why do you have to be so sweet and kind?

I have grown up with you by my side
At first my enemy now ...  best friend
My heart is dark from where you reside
Leave! I ask, but this rule you will not bend

My sweet demon you are in my head
Taunting me and speaking sweet terrors
I cannot **** you for you sleep in my bed
You live in me because of all my errors

Demon, you bring familiarity in the night
The shadows that follow us I know too well
They are our friends too, of that I’m right
Spinning me forever, a never ending carousel

Obey, do not display
Stay, there is no time to play
Emotions are not for show
Just reap the crops you sow

**** it all
Do not fall
You cannot fail
For you must set sail

To the ends of success
No need for excess
Emotions are not for show
Just reap the crops you sow

Reap and reap, build and build
Do not let down your guild
Keep going, do not dwell
On the pains that swell

This is what we are taught
This is how we get caught
In the perpetual fire blazing
Judging eyes a-gazing

It burns you up
To be ****** up
It devours your life
Nothing left, bring on the scythe

Why love or live another day?
When I've already been murdered inside?
What really is there left to say?
How can I live when I've already died?

Let me tell you something neat
Its knowledge is power that cannot be beat
Ready? It's a hard pill to swallow for sure
It will allow life to florish, but it's not quite a cure
You see.... it takes a lot of work
I'll say again, it takes a lot of work!!
Listen carefully now, It's not just for tricks
Allow yourself to feel the pain, and you will die a Phoenix
You will be brought back to life
And oh, what a wonderful life
It is filled with joy and love
It takes a lot of work, most important though, LOVE
The kind that's raw and open deep
The kind that brings a melody and weeps
Love, it is the birth and death of all
So listen carefully my Phoenix, do you hear the call?

"A Psalm of Life" by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882)
What the heart of the young man said to the Psalmist

Tell me not, in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream!
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
And things are not what they seem.

Life is real! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal;
Dust thou art, to dust returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.

Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way;
But to act, that each tomorrow
Find us farther than today.

Art is long, and Time is fleeting,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muffled drums, are beating
Funeral marches to the grave.

In the world’s broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle!
Be a hero in the strife!APsalmof_Life

Trust no Future, howe’er pleasant!
Let the dead Past bury its dead!
Act,—act in the living Present!
Heart within, and God o’erhead!

Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time;—

Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o’er life’s solemn main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, shall take heart again.

Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.

"The Silence Is So Loud"

Floating along the mountains, just above the ground
Soaring high, seeing, feeling and flying
The silence of wind so ******* loud
Falling down suddenly, what a rude awakening

But we do not wake, we just quietly stare
At the ground growing closer
Knowing we will not splatter here
Sometimes wishing it so, just for the exposure

Exposure of our fearless mind, so terrified
Not of the rise or fall, as we know them well
Afraid of our weakness, and that our fear might be verified
That we might let go, forgetting we're under a spell

We allow our rise to continue and soar without regard
And do not consider the descent we know is coming
Wind bustling our ears muffling the thoughts we continuously disregard
For the rise is beautiful, like flying and dancing

The high is absolutely thrilling, we can no longer think clearly
We try to stay with the energizing adrenaline, we try to gain composure
Yet, we grow weary
So here comes the free fall, watch the ground grow closer

And we begin to beg ... for a level head to rest in our cave.
Oh the great highs and the terrible lows. A level head is all we crave...

Absolutely beautiful carcinogenic
Debating, echoing, fetching
Gathering handfuls, intoxicating
Jigsaw kindness lacking memory
Nothing operating properly!
Questioning reasons sincerely
Testing universal visions
Why x-ray yesterday's zeal?

To all the beaten
To all the abused
For all the hurt
For all the accused
This is for you
This is a token
Listen to these words
Listen to the outspoken
Those who hurt them
Those who are mean
Look at what’s done
Look at what’s keen
Some run and hide
Some ruin lives
They come in sweet
They leave with knives
This is the way
This is how it's done
It helps the evil
It helps no one
Leave the lost alone
Leave them to be found
Notice the hatred you have
Notice all that's sound
Look at what you do
Look what's been made
They show with guns
They come with a grenade
Taking you away
Taking your life
Death is the cost
Death reaps with a scythe
You broke a heart
You broke your own
Not easily fixed
Not as a bone
Tell the world
Tell its worth
Breaking to be broken
Breaking this Earth

I know what you did to her
I know she agreed to have *** with you
But she didn't agree to the next part
you held her down and came inside
She told you not to she told you not to
You did it anyways
You apologized
but you did it again and
You apologized but you did it again

do you even feel bad
do you even care
That you broke her trust
Disrespected her

She told you she didn't want another baby
But you still did
She told you and..
You didn't listen
You tried anyways and you hurt her
Caused her pain
You apologized but you did it again
Apologized and apologized
But that doesn't fix what you've done and...

I know what you did to her
it's something that can never be undone
Did you think your reasonings were better
Than what she wanted
You wanted another baby she told you she didn't
Yet you held her down and you came inside her
Because your wants are bigger than hers
Did it make you feel powerful
Did it make you feel in control
Did it make you feel better.
I hope it made you feel worse
Worse than she felt when she was curled up on the bed crying

A skippity hop and muddy socks
Sail boats and rain coats
Semis and dump trucks
Bubble baths with ducks
Throwing a ball I love it all!!
***** feet and a sweet treat
Firefighters and quad riders
Lights and sirens and jolly lions
Puppy heroes and horses with wings
These are a few of my favorite things

A single string, a strand of hair
Tiny, almost unseen
A flower in a field
At the center of your life
Unnoticed
Dropping pedals slowly
Alone, blowing in the winds
The single string holds on
The lost flower stands tall
Unnoticed but
Not insignificant

A tiny piece
That no one sees
Yet a giant that stomps on by
One day you’ll understand
You’ll see
Just how big this is
How strong this is
I tell you now
But you do not know

I talk of something
That no one wants to feel
But you will,
One day you will know
The delicate touch
And strong force it brings
It’ll be too late though
For you did not notice before
The flower in a field
Blowing in the wind

You did not notice before
The string across your life
Holding everything together
With strength and softness
unnoticed
As it floats on by
Lost as it passes
Pedals gone as they fall
Never returning

Only leaving memories
Of what it once was
A single string, a strand of hair
Tiny, almost unseen,
A flower in a field,
At the center of your life
gone

Why do you haunt me ghost
Lingering, lurking, and watching your host
Around every joyful corner you linger
From every happy window you watch
And from ever peripheral shadow you lurk
You do not own me
Yet you dangle a key
As if to show my captivity
In chains I am bound
As memories fly around
Nightmare is a better name
For this haunting game
Day lit terrors before my eyes
Sunny momentarily, til you cover the skies
A dark lit confusion
Met with desperation

All the unspoken screams
Still rattle in my head
Fear fills what were once dreams
Panic now owns my bed
A bed I wish to share
With kindness and love
But you lay there and stare

Sh.. Don’t tell him, but I have a secret
He doesn’t know yet...
I have to go, or i’ll have more and more regret
It’s a big one… it’ll cause a lot of pain, I bet

I am leaving him, don’t you know?
For a woman, he doesn’t even know
She is pretty, most days I like her
She recently found herself, suddenly so sure

***** blonde hair, that rests at her neck
Bright green eyes, and .. give me a sec…
There’s more.
She is strong - a quality I adore

Her walk is purposeful
Her talk is straightforward and meaningful
She is ***** minded and a little bit odd
She is a pink salmon in a river of cod

Standing out from the crowd you see
She is a wild spirit that just got set free
I love her, like I never have before
A new found trust in her very core

I tell you this, because I had to hear it
I don’t know how he will bare it
When I tell him I have to go
To be with this woman I found when I was low

The biggest secret is yet to be told you see
Because the woman I need to be with,          is me.
I found strength in myself finally
He tried to put me through a refinery

But I dug deep, with no time to weep
I clung to my spirit in hopes to keep
The happy and adventurous me
So here I go, I am finally free

This is not a request
It is a demand for the best
Sent on a quest
To find the passion between my *******

Do not quit
Nor throw a fit
My desires remain unsplit
Here I am with all my wit

There I go
With passion in tow
Running like I did years ago
Here I go quickly, although

Awoken by reality’s lewdness
What a serious crudeness
Why does reality have such rudeness
Leaving me with nothing, but nudeness

Naked and confused by reality
The truly cruel world of fatality
Designed to live to die, another mortality
We live without living, Is this really our mentality?

Something needs to budge
So don’t look back holding a grudge
Put our world on trial with a ruthless judge
We need reconstruction here to rid the sludge

Let it out, all that is wrong
Speak it loudly, this may be long
A trial of the world just chugging along
Not noticing we lost all that is strong

Generational gaps of knowledge and experience
Bringing to you some kind of appearance
Like the technology at our fingertips
Or the way an old clock ticks
Differences in us by decades of age
Though, similar in so many ways
Like the way we love
Or want be loved
Like the need to dance
Or taking a chance
Generational differences
But human nonetheless

Like the broken glass of a window
Shattered to pieces
A million bits laid out for show

Sweep me up and throw me out
Please don’t
I beg, I scream and shout

I promise to shine in the sun
Sparkle in light
I’m better than what I’ve done

I am not trash to be swept away
I am more
Hear me and what I say

I will not be the glass as before
I cannot be
But a new creation to love and adore

See me in the glistening light
Uncovered
The darkness I’ll gladly fight

Broken with no return to past
No not true
I’m breaking out of this cast

No more restainsts or darkness
I tell you now
Don’t be so heartless

Let me try to do better
I swear it
I won't be a scarlet letter

Like the broken glass of a window
Let me shine
I want to rebuild, so please don’t let go

We wait and watch
A digital wall or wrist-watch
The ticks and tocks
Of the never ending clocks
Continuing night to dawn
It goes on and on
Never does it consider our mood
It is a date or something we elude
A specific dot to take our stance
We sit, we wait, we do the time dance
It goes on and on
One day it’ll be all gone

What, to you, is seen
Maybe you are soaking in the color green
I hope not for your soul wouldn’t be clean

Perhaps blue the one carried throughout night
Maybe you see it or feel it dampening your might
I hope not for it takes away your bright sight

Consider you see red in a darker shade
The kind given when skin meets blade
I hope not for it is no good to carry a grenade

Think now that you see only grey
A blank colorless sight hard to convey
I hope not for this color surely can slay

Look at the world and tell me
What color it is you see

Quickly it brewed
Slowly it cooled
A love with passion
Full of compassion
Died out in the way
Hot water steams away

Surfing black waves
Diving deep within unknown caves
Going without knowing a destination
What infatuation
Dark waters covering sight
Seaweeds tickling feet
Temping to pull under what might dare to enter their space

No skies above or light seen
Sounds muffled under deep green color
The feeling of floating and sinking combined
One single lonely feeling that almost died
Forever it lives on as the moon moves the tide
Ever-changing but never fleeting inside

Terminal depths and loved kept
Hidden are those who understand the scene
Displayed before your eyes above, although unseen
Surf the blackness of waves never failing gratification
Dive into the depths without knowing destination
Allow weeds that tickle your feet to pull you under, they tempt
Swallow the deep green waters of a bay where others are exempt

It’s the rare, true, and scariest goal
To find someone to love your soul

Is it worth it? After all we have done
And all that's been done to us.
Can we pretend darkness doesn't exist.
Fall without fearing the risk..
As if for the first time again
After all we have done and all that's been done to us.

Cause I am falling more with every lingering kiss
As you press close to me I forget about the risk.

Your touch is a harmony
Skin to skin, a perfect symphony
The warmth of you delights me
Your eyes are my sanctity
A sanctuary of a musical harmony

There's this weight I carry
It's heavy and exhausting
It's beautiful, and quite daring

It yanks me down more times than I can count
Squeezes, punches, and pushes every last nerve
But it's perfect on every account

It's the hardest, most difficult weight I've ever carried
Full of kicks and screams and fits
But it's something I refuse to burry

I could walk away and live a different life
I could be weightless and free
But this weight is worth more than my own life

So I will pull it up over ranges of mountains
I will piggy back it over every raging sea
And if anyone tries to harm it, I would **** thousands

It's the most precious cargo I could ever own
It's the only I can ever have
So I choose to carry it and to never be alone

For its weight brings me great joy
And the warmth is overwhelming
So I hold tight and hold strong and enjoy

For the terrain will mellow down
And it will not always be this heavy
So this weight I hold with love, and in it I drowne.