another lonely friday night
a night of lost thoughts
craving someone's company
somebody to talk to
i don't want every night to be like this

It may feel dark and eternal
The longing for a dawn that never came
It may feel cold and ethereal
To burn in the fire of a heatless flame

Black eyes, as a prophet of things of evil
Beating it's wings as a whisper of devil

The eternity of a night of misery
As dark as black might be
As the raven observes the war
And calmly quotes ''nevermore!''

It has been days drowned into night
It has been months of dreads and harms
It has been summers and still no warmth
It has been decades and still no light

This may not be much and
I thought we were done here, but
I don't want to be cold
I don't want to be cold,
I don't want to be cold
anymore and these poisons are slowly seeping
through my bloodstream, crawling
Like something alive and dangerous
I don't like when my hands shake but at least I'm angry enough
To care, or at least it comes out between my teeth in
fury instead of being soft
instead of tears pooling over my cheeks, I guess I'm not as gentle
as I used to be and I think I break things
a lot more than I should, but we're all
a little pointless anyway, we're just kind of
drifting
like paper bags from some kid's school lunch
just as useless & discarded, tumbling
aimlessly without a purpose
to grasp for;
You tell me to take it one
catastrophe at a time, but all I can think of is blood
pooling over floorboards and all I can think of is
how I can't breathe right now, how much I want to breathe; & you say
"this will pass", but what you never mention
is how it will  come back, and I
will be here alone and that's
Just how it always goes.

The feeling of being lonely even though the other side of the bed is occupied.
I feel her warmth on the other side
but I am still cold
As cold as her heart has become.
All of a sudden my feelings don't matter.
You're incapable of understanding them
or chooses not to understand
My needs doesn't matter anymore
just yours.
This loneliness you make me feel is too familiar
So, just in case you're worried.
Don't be.
I've survived this before
but it's not guaranteed
as a broken heart does not get broken the same way
the chip gets bigger and eventually the heart...
the heart...
shatters...
into a million pieces.
Survival is not guaranteed
but at least I tried.
The feeling of loneliness even though the other side of your bed is occupied
with warmth
but not meant for me.

10 | Heartbreak in Hatfield

You and I are in the same space, but we live in different galaxies.
That’s why we could never get along for extensive periods of time.
After several glasses of wine, I realised that you talk more than I do.
Maybe sometimes pain hurts more when we always choose to ignore it.
I can love you better than him; from eight until late he always calls his ex-girlfriend Kim.
I wonder what you get up to when he’s not there; I wonder what you really know about him.
I never knew that my loving heart could get played like harps and violins do.
The symphony is exquisite, but the pain and the heartbreak are obviously not.
I wonder what you know about everything happening around you while you wander away from me.
I gave you exclusive views to breathtaking galaxies, but you still needed more space like the astronaut lady.
I have fallen in love with my own solitude, but loneliness has taken over every single part of my life.
I’m scared to see who or what I have left behind; these Hatfield streets have become so nostalgic.

i don't mean to portray our love as a damaged one-
after all, i am the broken goods
coming into play; i only miss
when i was no one at all,
and what i did didn't echo in
someone's mind for eternity.
you are a wholesome edge to a
scattered puzzle,
and i am a box of rocks
spilt across the velvet of
an empty casino.

when i fell in love with you (god
saying that is even a lie-
i fall further in love every day)
i did not realize how fierce it would become.
but you have been a fortress always.
you have your weak points, sure
who doesn't, but you hold me up
when I'm down and christ
your acceptance feels like heaven.

i am a brick wall and you are picasso,
i am a furnace and you a vat of cement.
romantic words no longer come to me,
HE stole them all, along with my voice.
but i have a few to stroke your neck with in the dead of night;
i whisper blessings to a sweat-wet pillow,

and i pray that that will be enough.

The moment the girl listens to such music
Half a million hearts on the otherside of the universe
Explodes. Into tiny fragments swept away with the wind.
The music gives her such power and control
Making her buzz and glow more vividly than before.
If she wanted, she could hold the whole world ransom in her grasp
For she hears the music differently. Not like how anyone else could ever hear it.
The beats and melody runs through her veins
Enhancing her features and feat of strength.
With the music, she is the strongest in the universe, surpassing Gods and Monsters.
But without it, the girl is nothing
But a mere fragment of stardust.
No control or power, no words.
Without music, the world lives to see another day and all she can do is stare into the distance and wonder: "Why do I exist?: