I'm angry
I'm so angry
I never let it out
I never try to shout
I only pout

I'm so full of rage
I've locked it in a cage
I never let it play
I never let it see day
It scares me
How far I could
Make you bleed

I want to hurt
Everyone
Who hurt
Me
Who took advantage
Of my childhood
Who abandoned
My sincerity
I would do anything
I would break my bones
For so many
But I can't even get
The bare minimum
I can't even get a penny
Of love
Of laughter
Of anything
But disaster
It makes me angry
Deep inside
But I let it hide

I've grown strong
So they say
Little do they know
I've always been
This way
Strong
Never breaking loose
Never trying the noose
I don't want it
I don't want strength
I want to be released
I want peace
I want
To be heard
I want
To understand
Why
Why
WHY
I would let myself
Die
To be there
To show
I really care

But nobody
Nobody
Would care
Care
Nobody's there
Nobody is
Ever
*******
There

I'm angry
I'm livid
I'm tired of living
A lie
That I'm fine
I'm sick inside
Don't ask me why
Like you can't imagine
*******
******* all
I'm tired of wanting
To bawl
My eyes out
*******
I hope you all
Burn
I hope you all turn
Your stomachs
Reading this
I hope I find
Bliss
I
Hope
I never miss
Any of you
I am so *******
Angry
I want to punish
All of you
For hurting me
As a child
As a teenager
As a women
As a human
I deserve
Better
I deserve
To let me loose
To let me choose
To be free
To be angry
To be understood
To be ******* heard
I deserve someone
Who cares
Not the ******* bare
Minimum
I'm tired of begging
getting nothing
I'm tired of hugging
All my enemies
Of being sweet
And loving
Of being mocked
And crying
I want revenge
I want to vent
I want to let
The cage open
I want to break glass
I want to see them
Fall on their ***
I want to smash
Every single
Throat
That ever
Let me go
To such dark
Places in my soul
There's such a hole
Of anger
Of danger
I can't let free
*** I would hurt
Everybody
I would hurt myself
It would never end
My hell

I just want to scream
Scream
Scream
******* SCREAM
I want someone to SEE
I WANT THEN TO HEAR
AND BEWARE
of me
Beware
If I ever dare
To release my
Inner terror

Be ******* ware

Mexican food from that joint near your dads
The pooling spotty blood on my bitten lips
My mothers words
My fathers driving

Sadness is
The look she gave me when I told her what he did to me
The burn marks on my hips
Fogged up glasses
Cheap *****
Smoking a cigarette all the way down to the end  

Joy is
His laugh
The way the baby hair on my arms stand up when it’s cold and I feel alive
Italian food made together
Olive jars
Macs soft ears

When did I become
the monster under your bed?
When did I grow teeth?

obsessed, terrified, the idea of seeing someone that you knew intimately, seeing them in a bathing suit or without a shirt, knowing that your hands traveled down those exposed places, remembering that, and knowing you can never do it again, they are across a room, alone, with someone else, twenty feet away, maybe more, and you can feel their hips in your hands, your body knows exactly how theirs moves, but you will never feel it again, horrified, overwhelmed