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duncan 3h
i swear i was born for the train.

slow and convenient.
high maintenance
and free if youre lucky
but cheap if youre not.

i can

get you close enough to
know youre lost.
a kink in these wheels
might send us flying.


i am so far gone
and past. the mold on
these leaves smell
much of home.
and i am giving my
skin for impossible deeds.

to rid us of time.
to live when i please.

in some way i feel
as though i am not living
if im not being hit
by the scaffolding.
a world is being built
while i check my
clothes in a passing window.

i will say words i regret
on this train, but they are
words i mean. like cyanide
for the agent i will die
for my cause if it cant
kill me first
The way that people think sometimes makes me sick
The way we criticize so hard and judge so quick
Before you judge me look in the mirror
All of the sudden things become much clearer.

You just see face and the hair, lips and the eyes
But I know all your secrets and I know your lies
If you look closer you will see
That deep down you’re no better than me.

I see past the make up for what you really are
Just a regular person covering a scar
Hidden in your mind, a place you don’t go
Memories and things you’d rather people don’t know.

We all have those secrets buried deep inside
Things that we’d do almost anything to hide,
We try to cover with makeup clothes and that certain grace
But when you look in the mirror it’s staring you in the face.

You can put on the act and the makeup too
But I can see right through you,
You’re just another girl wanting to be accepted
Fearing the burn of being rejected
Falling into the trap of mindless trends
Just envied by your friends
Thinking that once you got it then you’re in
But you still feel the emptiness from within.

So foolish so blind people can be
Take off those colored contacts and you’ll see.
I think I'm afraid to lose you
Which is extremely ironic
Considering I'm the one who left
See I don't mean "lose you"
As in lose you from my life
I think it's more about your approval
Your desire
Your intensity
Your love
I want to be wanted and yes I know
It's super screwed up
I wish I understood it more myself
See, on a conscious level
I know I don't need you and that
I am not responsible for your choices
I am not involved in your life
And quite frankly I shouldn't be
Considering the mess my mind's in
Maybe my brain hasn't yet realized
That I've been without you for a year
And I've been doing fine
Maybe I only see my value
Reflected in the opinions of others
So I seek everyone's desire
Instead of my own acceptance
I don't understand
I wish I did
I wish I had the answers
Maybe one day this will all make sense
Maybe one day I won't be so sick
Maybe one day I can be me
Without fear
Without worry
Without anxiety
I just want to be happy
I just want to be free
I just want to be me
And know what that means
Nylee 2d
little longer
a bit more stronger
and so much more
I hope for.
All the papers
I just tore
my dreams not
reaching their shore.
Well before,
so much better
heart sheltered
I, not deserted.
Everything I wore
all filtered
refined to core
Could go ahead with
all that
keep quiet
be that
watch and mimic
being sick
in head.
my poetry is shit
cause I'm not a poet
I'm in pain
and empty inside
i need to write, only
when i feel sick
Sela 3d
That day, everyone keeps comforting my heart.
That day, my anxiety overwhelmed me.
That day, no one is paying attention with her.
That day, everyone just want to know.
That day, my mother was fighting against her demon.

Today, someone gives me the feeling, the feeling is familiar.
Today, everyone is getting anxious.
Today, the day they know their friend is lying there unconscious.
Today, I know I should tell myself how I should deal with the irony.
Today, my friend is fighting against the same demon that my mother has been dealing with for these past few months.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow.
Will it come to my mom and my friend?
For them who I loved with my heart.
For them who never stop believing that the tomorrow will come.
For them who fight against their Chronic Kidney Disease.
Terri 4d
I'm sick and tired of you
Not being there for me
But I'm always there for you

I'm sick and tired of you
Saying I'm important to you,
But you make me feel not
Cus you are to me

I'm sick and tired of you
When you sent me mixed signals,
But say it was natural of you
I just realized it now

I'm sick and tired of you
When you made me fall for you
But you was no where to be found
To be catching the fuck out me
And it fucking hurts
Just like falling from
A 10-storey building
But landing with my two-feet
And I'm sick and tired of you.
Hi nads
Mar 6d
I feel sick.
I need to throw up these words in my mind,
That have gotten me feeling so ill.
And if you're reading this,
I'm sorry.
This is going to be long.

It hurts a lot,
To reconnect with someone you were once in love with.
I don't know why it hurts so much.
I am in love with someone,
Someone far greater than the person in question.
The person I was once in love with,
I suppose they still hold a portion of my heart.
I've only been talking to them again for a few days,
But it seems like we've just picked up where we left off.
The jokes we make,
The laughs we share,
It's easy to remember what things used to be like.
But I have to remember,
I have to reign myself in.
They hurt me.
It's not realistic to think that everything used to be okay.
I make up these scenarios in my mind,
And I only remember the good stuff that happened between us,
When there was arguably more bad.
And that's something that I need to realize.
They hurt me,
And I'm still healing.

The thing is,
Why am I still healing?
Why does it feel like a wound has been opened again?
I'm so, so very in love with who I am with now.
It's incredibly insane how happy they make me.
So why do I get upset over these things?
It might be because I tend to reminisce,
And I like to look back on happier times.

In all honesty,
I feel miserable right now.
I feel like I'm trapped,
I can't tell anyone what's going on between me and my past lover.
Because all I get is ridicule.
"Why are you talking to them?"
I don't know why.
I hope that this just is a platonic thing on both sides.
I'm suspecting that it might not be.
"What did you expect?"
I expect a lot,
I want things to be okay.
I didn't expect this, though.
"You're just going to get hurt again."
I know this.
I've been through this many times.
And.. I don't care.
"What about your boyfriend?"
I don't know why this is in question.
I love him, and I'm not going to leave him.

So, what do I do?
If things don't go the way I want them to?
I don't want to lose them again.
I worked so hard to be someone that they could come to.
What to do,
If things go wrong?
I guess I'll wait for it to happen.
inside I fight a battle
every day with my own heart
it screams at me to listen
begs me to fall apart
my heart has become a plauge
feasting on my soul
darkened with sin
it thirsts for control
lowkey inspired
Chezka 7d
To the person I love,
I'm writing this with all my heart,
You made me happy,
You made me cry,
I'm sorry, I tried.
I'm sorry, I lied.  

I love you, I really do.
I'm sorry I have to leave you
even if I dont want to,
I wish I could stay,
but I know soon, you will be okay.

pls let me be the one that got away.

By then, I will leave this world,
Selfish and UNCURED.
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