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I think I see you everywhere
But I can't find you
It hurts when I'm not near you
When you are gone
When Im gone
I feel something
This void I need filled
Where are you?
No matter when or where
The one place
I know you are
My safest location...
Pulling at my heartstrings
That missing you feeling
rk May 5
under the velvet darkness
of those summer nights
you held me close to you
like a sacred song

rumi once said
that lovers do not finally meet
somewhere along the way
they are inside each other
all along

is that why your name
reawakened a fire in my blood
the moments our lips touched?
your kisses sweet
like the first new moon in the sky

i drank the honey from your lips
and realised how blind i'd been
to ever look for love
when you had lived inside me
in every lifetime.
- i wonder when you gaze at the stars, do they still sing my name?
raen May 5
My hands are cold, too cold
the wind burning my nose,
as it pushes me across the road,
hitting me with the reality
that I'm not there where the sun is

Numbers jump out at me
Splashing my face
with their significance

Buses meeting trains and hotel rooms never did leave, did you?

It was I who left.

Hours, numbers
Days, years
A decade and 3 years
and this is the first
but hopefully the last

Magnified void that clenches me

I get lost most times
but those numbers again,
Always coming up to remind me...

reflective tears
as the clock ticks past
to the past

and I am left with my hands
on my face and the clock's face

Trembling fingers touching keys

Chilled by so many reasons--
Emptied by the sighing seasons

I remind myself to smile,
amidst these blurry letters

Your laughter
resonating in my heart

Never leaving me
much of my commute
these past few days
has been about the first call
we’ll never have after our break.

obsessing over
the receiver bringing
through your imagined hello
in more weeks than i dare count.

my phones notif’s are almost taunting me
reminders from every little corner of the internet
that life can’t pause
the moving on
after the
death of another gay boys feelings.

the thought
eventually there’ll be an
unspoken acceptance
your voice will never be close and familiar again

unshackles me.

as the northern line pulls into the platform
i like to imagine somewhere under its torturous sound
you’re speaking to me and i just can’t hear it.

this is the peace i’ve been left with
to patch myself up
in all of its ugly simplicity.

oh how a heart can sink but still shine.
oh how my love can be smothered
and you be fine.
MuseumofSoph Apr 26
Tears fill my eyes as I watch your shadow fade,

off to fulfill its purpose, I let it leave.

Although my heart followed you, my body stayed.

Once again I’m all alone, I grieve

left to wonder how I might fill the hole in my chest.

An hour goes by that feels like forever

I close my eyes, not to rest…

but to picture me and you together.

How can I bear through this pain?

Whisper to me when you miss me

When will I see you………again?

I’ll carve our initials into a tree and pray to god that one day he’ll set me free.
rk Apr 19
and now
when we are nothing
but dust
i only wish
that you let me show you
you were always
- so cover me up and know you're enough to use me for good.
YReem619 Apr 11
I think about you better with my eyes closed,
My love where do I begin.
The beginning is as close as the end,
Although there is a lot of time spent in between.
I can't seem to get enough of you,
Something is missing, especially without you.

Your energy lingers on me long after you are gone,
Like the scent of the beloved that sticks.
Sweet palmed baby,
Soft eyed angel.
A gentle voice escapes your delicate lips,
Floaty words wander out and right into me.

Nothing compares to one short evening,
Me in a room with you.
With some strawberries and wine,
We are touching and talking.
A brief warm light bursting through,
Yet too weak to reflect on anything.

The only nights I do not dream about you,
Are ones that I'm asleep next to you.
The nights you have your plush rosy lips on me before,
I drift into a sort of peacefulness only found within you.
A crisp soft blow building up on me,
Until we collide, meet at some spot of sweet release.

I no longer recognise the hours night turns into day,
Or the noises that surround us, like chirping birds.
Two worlds subconsciously complimenting eachother,
The taste of your candied skin remains on my tongue.
Tracing my tongue and all down my throat,
It lingers longer, beyond us parting.
rk Apr 9
you looked at me
like a child
looks at his fallen ice cream
mourning the sweetness
he never got to taste

i should have seen it then
the goodbye in your eyes
i guess i was too busy
trying to stop myself
from spilling over your feet.
- this will be the last time you take me.
RJM Apr 2

my body a vessel
my being, come true
from the source of my soul;
all my rivers and oceans
flow straight back to you.
for only you, could weave a magic
a witchcraft so divine;
that just a single thought of you
can take me back through time.
reliving each and every moment
every kiss and stolen glance;
to laying laying alone in darkness
realising it would be our last.

i still think of you every single day.
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