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Sign the card, O apathy
Get well soon, I tell myself
As I hold my hand out
To grasp what's left behind
In the aftermath
In the wreckage

Light the fuse, O apathy
With time being a hidden bomb
Ticking, sparking, molded to fit
Into sentence structure
And verse form
Into handwritten letter

Save the day, O apathy
Take me to a different place
Where weather never changes
And the earth doesn't circle the sun
Never burning
Never freezing

Twist my words, O apathy
Contort them to your whimsy
Play this melody over again
Until the notes crawl to the gutter
A time to rest
A time to recover
Ashtyn Lucas Jan 7
Moods can change and switch
Sometimes on their own
Making a sad moment exciting
Making a happy moment dreadful

Like flipping on and off a light switch
These emotions change
Not on purpose, of course
The emotions rearranged

If a day wasn't already hard
This would make it harder
Being dragged into an abyss
This is what it's like to be bipolar
What I deal with every day, for the people that don't know.
eve Dec 2018
Miserable and unmotivated,
Mood swings from time to time,
Lying, it has evolved daily.
I can’t control myself the same way anymore,
I’m discovering a new side to myself,
I proclaim that space is what will cure this pain,
However, that’s not the claim.
That unfamiliar side that remains,
Is the one that nobody seems to understand,
They’re getting tired of me;
Bored.
I wish I could reach out,
Nah, I’d probably just freak them, like ****.
I call them friends,
Nowadays,
They’re merely as important to me.
Quick judgments, slow reaction times,
If they ever need assistance,
I’m always available.
If the tables turn, role switches,
I’d be let down,
Yet again.
The irony resides here,
Trust within myself no longer exists,
Entirety has been reduced to half of a whole,
I’m a worthless piece of —
So sick of being misused,
Treated differently, and most importantly,
Never fully acknowledged of.
You notice my presence when you want,
Not when you can.
Your effort is only being wasted,
Referencing me as a “friend”,
Just an acquaintance,
Actually, a stone cold stranger that wants nothing to do with anyone or anything.
Alice Lovey Apr 2018
"Yes or no?"
I always say "yes,"
The time comes,
But I'm a mess.
Why did I say yes?
Who was I that day?
Or was it all a play,
Impulsive,
At my own sway?
And anyway,
Who am I today?
Confidence?
Misery?
Beloved or
Anxiety?
Can you help me?
Can you see me?
I want to be...

Whole.
Alice Lovey Apr 2018
How is it possible
To feel two things at once?
    "Dichotomies."
        Atrocities
That sheer the mind like paper.
"I hate you,
                     I love you,"
Spoken so close together.
Every time,
Each some crime.
I'm b roKen then TRANSFORMED.


A swelling heart,
                              A burning rage.
Back     and     forth.
Don't turn the page.
Not again,
Not like this.
Please don't stop this thrilling chase.


"Stay with me,"
                           "Leave me be,"
If you know what's best for you.
I'm good for you,
I promise you.
"Don't look at me,"
                                  "Who is she?"


I'll isolate
Everything.



There is none,
I'm the one.


I am nothing,
This time it's final.
I'm sick of you,
So don't come back.
                                   Where are you going?
                                   Why am I sewing
                                   This new patch?

                                    Let me f
                                                   a
                                                     d
                                                         e
                                                            i n  t  o    b   l    a     c     k . . .
I played around a bit with structuring here. It was fun! This is meant to be read with different paces in each section. Starting off slow, then picking up, slowling to desperation... until the calm hopeless emptiness of isolation, to anger again and once more back through  a slow drop into giving up.
Alice Lovey Apr 2018
Is this the quiet after the storm?
The tunneling winds
Leaving worlds torn.
The rain had beat down,
Leaving us to drown.
Warmth is what it seizes,
Blue eyes darkening as
Cold water freezes.

"I don't feel anything right now."

Calling voices outside me
They echo,
Attempting to guide me.
I don't listen, I watch the ice glisten.
Cuz I'm not as they described me.

Then as if in clarity,
After light dies, and anger subsides,
A spectrum of rarity.
Each color a hue
Of a muse
On a horizon of sunset and dew.
Lightheart Jan 2018
A mood drop is simply proof
That you don’t always feel like this
So when your mood plumets down
When your happiness ends
Remember this love,
It’s not always this way
And happiness will come ‘round again
You’ll be okay <3
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