A dead flower for
every finger counted on your hand
and blood roses for
every lover you've had
and then and then and then
there's a knife
for every lover you've had
that I wish were mine
i saw you with the one you love,
she's really lucky for the things she have,
does she know that she have my world?
does she even know your worth?
while i was staring at the both of you,
i didn't know what to do,
my eyes became wet,
teardrops i felt.
Fleeting moments of firing fantasy. Seducing this sleepy mind. Drawing images of a life lived by someone else. So real sometimes it's almost me in the picture. Why do I torture and tear myself. Encircled by jealousy, crazed by guilt. The flames rise higher and I love the burn. Take the matches. Ignite the fire. It's your turn.
Undo your tie,
Take off your shoes.
Because it may take me until the sun rises, to explain to why I’m no longer yours,
Though the timing will never feel right.
It was easier to kiss goodnight, nod and smile,
than to shatter your small world.
I’m willing to pack all my bags,
If your willing to forgive,
I’ll leave the keys—
I hope we can still be friends.
Kinda sucks it had to come to this,
I wish we could have just been able to coexist,
That you would be able to calm this cynical idealist.
I was talking, but you never heard,
Even when the subject reccured.
The topic was that i was unhappy with all that was happening,
And everything was fracturing.
Segments of unnecessary pain suddenly appeared,
And it was everything i feared.
The person i didn't want to be again
Was hear to put an end
To all that I've built
Only to later leave and leave me with guilt.
And now look at me.
Im just unsightly.
I have no value,
Not to anyone, not to you.
A horizon that will never be expanded,
Nor ever added.
And yet so frantic.
And with these nomadic emotions
You'll alas realize the notion
That all along
My heart was a vagabond.
It was never meant for you
if im speaking the truth.
It was only a matter of time
Before i shattered your heart and you overused mine
Before i stepped outta line and you got drunk on wine and we both said we were fine.
So I drink some booze
Because we all know it soothes,
Just drinkin away my sorrows
And saving my problems for tomorrow,
But wait i dont drink
So i just stay up all night and let it sink.
Yeah, for your sake
I go through this heartache,
Thinking about how you dont hold my hand as tight as i hold yours
Thinking about what ive done wrong and what ive done right,
Thinkin about how i want buy so much for you so i do these hazardous chores.
You're dwindling my hopes hun..
And im pretending like im having fun
But im crying every night when i think about your skin
How you think you dont fit in
Or your pretty brown eyes
How afraid i am when you talk to guys
How im causing you so much stress
And i just wanna see you at your best.
But im just dragging you down
Yeah, im the cause of that frown
Im cause of those tears
Im adding to your fears.
Then boom, day comes and im so kind
Keeping all i want to say in mind.
Im not good enough
Im no use
Im not needed
Its my love you can refuse.
Leave me if you need to
Ill be waiting
Its okay if you make me feel blue
Its my love thats fading.
You make me feel alone
But when im around you i feel at home.
You make me cry
And for all the hard work i put into trying to make you feel better, i only get an exasperated sigh.
Im stuck with knowing im lovin' you a LOT more than you're lovin me
And Im just trying to set myself free
Trying to get my mind and heart to LEAVE ME BE.
Would it be okay if i said i was tired of pretending that im happy?
That youre the reason im feeling crappy?
That im feeling so empty inside
And yet so occupied.
Would it be okay... if for once. I cried.
That i could show that side...
Without ruining your day
And having you shew my problems away.
Would that be considered selfish..?
Oh shit. i accidentally expressed myself.
Yeah... Im sorry