I realize that I am jealous of the sun’s
kiss upon your delicate, caramel skin.
The fervent glow of Her lips
pressed against your supple flesh
singes the curve of my mind’s rapture.
I cannot concentrate when she
leers at me with fervent embers in her eyes.
I touched the blue butterfly, resting
on a glowing, peach rose before us
as our fingers loosely interlocked in the heat.
You cried because someone told you
that the butterfly would never fly again,
but I knew that was not true.
Don't say that.
“It’s true, I'm jealous"
Can't you see that I'm broken?
All confused? Like one of those fucking crystal things you find in garden shops. The surface is deceptive, utterly smooth. But, you'll find that on the inside, it's- jagged and sharp. Beautifully dangerous. A bruised complex of little pieces.
You can't be jealous of this.
How could you want to feel this way?
How could anyone want to feel this way?
You're a fool.
You're foolish to admire.
"Karen, her name's Karen!"
whispered one to the other,
Those married men...
That new intern...
what about loyalty?
what about pride?
what about honour?
what about when you said you'll only have your eyes on me?
what about when you say "you're my one and only"?
plain old lies?
Just in the name of having fun...
--what about feelings?
what about respect?
what about honesty?
what about "no more lies"?
what about trust?
my heart still belongs to you,
you're the only one I'll come home to"...
But about loyalty?
What about... the rest?...
in the name of FUN...
Baby's got those California dreamin' eyes that
are just two shades left of San Jose and just as sand soft.
He's got those Brooklyn lips
muddling sugar cubes and bourbon and bright red
cherry stems, all shy smiles in a West Side bar this short of
profane, and oh, you burn.
Flyers and missing posters:
My name, your mouth.
If found, please call.
He wipes me off the picture frames with
cold water and vinegar.
I leave my fingerprints everywhere:
on wine glasses and cigarette butts,
takeout menus and the window
leading to the fire escape.
this is my way of saying I am still here.
this is my way of desperate you will not forget me,
your hands still know me,
my name still lingers on your tongue --
but he still cleans the frames and
locks the window and
goes to sleep in a bed
I have never spent the night in.
A friend advised
that I find inspiration
in other creations,
to not let an example of pristine craft
dissolve the lashing of my raft,
and plunge me into the freezing waters.
This morning I woke on the banks,
felt yellow under my face,
behind my eyes.
I took the chance, the fleeting chance,
before it faded
They go hand in hand, best friends,
Blood red maroon, mixed with pastel black.
Cotton candy pink and golden skin.
With each pounding beat of my heart, I feel as they'll burst out laughing.
Buried alive underneath my skin.
Hand in hand, they'll take over.
What happens then?
What happens when I loose my skin?
Paranoid and jealous.
Vengeance appeals to be just.
I am an embodiment of my fears.
It’s the same routine,
Why haven’t you done this?
Why haven’t you done that?
But then I have to remind myself
THEY are not me,
THEY are not living for my dream.
Easy to judge,
Because THEY don’t know my story.
Easy to criticise,
When the people you know give you all the glory.
But yet THEY bring me down,
Put yourself in my shoes and stop being so mean.
Same thing everyday,
But attempted every single different way,
Trying to get noticed,
But somehow always rejected.
Finally feel like you see progression,
THEY are praying that you don't get the attention.
Focus on yourself,
And where you want to be,
THEY should never affect you or your self-esteem.
Not pretty enough to model,
Not smart enough to teach,
Just know that you are good enough to me.
You can do anything you want,
And be anything you want to be.
You may not be the best you at this time,
But I promise you THEY will notice you.
And THEY will realise it was all apart of your scheme.
They say what belongs to you would find its own way back to you,
Only they know...
You threw me once,
did you expect me to come back to you?...
So I let you go once,
would you ever find your way back to me?
Were you testing me? Somehow...
Were you testing our fates...
the one you held within your palms...?
I can't help but pondered...
If come back this time, would we fall on the same ground?...
Or will we break when we're collided?...
Only they know...
Only those who've known would know...
Heard you're with someone new now...
I should've known,... I should've known...
You'd never left your heart cool for so long...
In the name of avoiding loneliness, avoiding the longing...
Had always been a fling,
but this time would it be your eternal song?
Or just another song?...
I dare not to ask, I wouldn't want to know...
Only my fool would believe you're still my one and only, my own...
And so I've been told...
And so I'll keep my heart cold...
'Cause it's the only one I can hold,
my pride and dignity...
The only key to my sanity...