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The time I spent with you I never regret.
I learned so much about myself in your presence,
and more than I could have imagined,
I fell in love with someone I wanted to spend forever with.
Ironically though forever now seems impossible.
Every day is a waiting game,
and I do not know if this second will be the last.
So I turn away.
Leave behind what made me so happy.
And all the memories I’ll treasure
will only remain as that.
I do not want you to see me the way I will become.
Goodbyes laced with anger will hurt far less than a goodbye at the edge.
And I’m sorry it’s come to this.
I’d turn my days around if I could,
and all the lies would never have to be.
But I can’t hold onto hope when hope flickers so small.
Elisa M 6h
I’m so very sorry
that you had to fight
While I was here praying
for your safety at night
Two people so similar
the same DNA
Yet one had to leave
while the other could stay
I wish I could take on
the pain you went through
As the monsters inside you
so viscously grew
And therefore my brother
I want you to know
I’m sorry it was you
and not me who had to go
Purpose has never been an easy concept
For someone like me,
Because I-
the candle had just one.
I was to hold your fire,
I was told to contain it,
I was told that it doesn’t matter what happens to me in the end,
What matters is you keep warm,
And calm,
And everything I was supposed to be.

You liked me a lot,
You said it was because I held ambition,
I didn’t burn easily,
I still had a lot of fight left.

I felt better about myself,
Until I felt myself fade away.
Until I melted and burned out,
Until all that was left was hot wax.
Till there was no more spark,
No more flame,
No more smoke.
No more waxy glances and midnight warmth,
No more cascading hot tears and broken wicks,
No more of what I used to call myself.

I hope you hurt as much as I did,
I hope one day you know what it feels like to be ignited
And not know how to stop burning.
Burning isn’t easy when hot wax drips on the floor
Lainey 9h
Life can have it’s highs and lows,
The sorrow and the joy.
Sadness knocked upon our door
When we lost our little boy.
That year has passed and here we are
A Mum and Dad once more.
We gaze at you in disbelief
Oh girl that we adore!
You were a bud about to bloom
When we put aside our sorrow.
We never knew that your blushen hue
Would be the colour of tomorrow.
Claudia 12h
That you're gone
Sort of changes
The fundament on which
The entire universe is built

Like someone
Pulled the ground away
Beneath the feet of
The world itself
Or ***

Something is fundamentally Wrong
You are missed
By every atom


Forever to be tainted by
The hole after you

And I
Haven't the faintest idea
About what to do now

How do you carry on
When the very basics of life
Have changed permanently?
Everything falls apart
At the seams
Anonymous 16h
I knew life was more than my love for you.

I just got lost in the idea that I'd suffocate without you by my side.
But I knew that with time and space, the sun would come out
and I’d remember how to breathe again.
But I guess, I never anticipated this bittersweet feeling
that arises when my mind wonders back to you.
You’re getting married this weekend,
which I’ll admit still surprises me after everything.
But I’m not shocked, nor am I angry anymore.
I’m not as broken as I thought I was.

And through this time, I learned that you didn’t break me.
But rather that, I broke myself trying fix you.
This was unfair to me, but it was also unjust to you.
Fragments of my soul were never meant
to substitute your missing pieces.
So, although there are lot of things between us,
that I guess always will be there,
I want you to know that I’m sorry, and that
I truly want you to be happy.
I’m not done growing from this and I won’t be for a long time
But I’m done letting this define me.

Because life is more than my love for you
Kanara 17h
At Night
I dream of My Mother’s Embrace
Oh, that woman
Skin and soul like earth:
So soft it nearly crumbles
At the slightest touch
Crooked smile like
***’s star,
Pervading me with light
Every time the corners of her lips curve upwards towards heaven

At Night
I touch myself to thinning, silvered, hair
Bushy mustaches
Old jokes withering away
Like the crunchy leaves from the frail
Trees of Autumn,
To slow dances
Under the moonlight,
Flashing my toothless smile
As you hold my small, brown hand in yours,
As I grasp onto your large waist,
There, in that pale, faint moonlight  you look down upon me
As if I am the most precious thing on earth
As if your slimy heart lies on my palms
This I dream
Of you cherishing me as if I am yours
Cherishing me Because I am yours
As my eyelids start to open
And dawn sheds himself on my tear-stricken face
Reality sinks in its claws
You’re not here, father
I will never feel  your embrace
It was a distressing time
When the heartless wind
Kept on blowing,
And the white clouds
Shifted into endless grey,
Bringing thunder and lightning.

A storm arises
And osculates
In the midst of the dark sky,
Droplets of water
Came thudding
Into the ground.

The wind
Steadily emits
And whispers
Their unfeigned apologies
Into the mist
Of the tempest.

The sky
And the clouds mourned,
While solemnly,
It ruefully smiled
And took you away,
Only leaving ashes behind.
I wrote this poem to express many lives that I knew has passed away, including the closest friends.
Troy 1d
Thou red headed Phoenix
So full of life
Lay still on the table
So cold and limp

Ascending upon high
This Phoenix does fly
So be buried in the earth
Soon to rise again

The shattered remains
You leave so many dear
The pain in which has fallen
Can only pass with time

Until you fly once more
We mourn the loss of you
So come back soon
And gaze us with your flame

Shine bright
Oh Phoenix of fire
Death does it become you
For when you sink into the ashes

A new life emerges
Clinging still to thou dead flesh
It shutters slightly at the cold
Never to regain its full flight

So we say unto thee
May you Rest In Peace
Never to feel pain
Or sorrow ever again
Close friend and muse of Phoenix of Fright has passed away. This is in memory of her. May she rest in eternal peace.
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