Can you see me?
Am I just invisible
To your forever looking eyes?
Can't you see
How hard I've tried
To get myself here,
To be heard,
And now?
It appears my voice has been lost
Within the unforgiving crowd.
All I ever wanted,
Was to own a crown,
A place,
A thing
To call my own,
And yet?
It seems that no one,
Not one single person,
Gives a **** about the existence
Of a born tune
Given the life to do whatever they please
But?
You seem determined
On knocking her novelty down.

I thought,
That maybe, just maybe,
You were interested in the workings of my mind.
How it ticked and tocked.
Why the emotions ricked and rocked.
When the creations exploded out,
In a scurrying storm,
I acted insane;
Gloriously insane.
But yet,
The initial hope
And wear of my first-seen happiness
Has grown too tacky and lifeless
For the likes of you,
Because what I am?
What I have become, created and exposed
Through time and written notes?
*You don't enjoy it like the way you used to.

Someone once told me
Never give up.
Your soul is beautiful.
But what if,
Just what if,
I wanted to give up,
Just this once,
And create my soul to be imperfect?

Without you,
I'm just an emotional wreck.
Thanks for everything, music.

It's all ok now,
It's over,
One last kiss,
One last touch,
And it's over.
It's over.
Please let your breath fade
And wash over the pain,
Because it's over.
It's all ok.

Oh look,
Dusty memory built on dusty memory,
Let's blow the dirt away,
Give the old generator a massive
KICK
Oh  look,
Let's oversee the images of happy children,
Ice-cream vans out to play,
And skip on over to the start
QUICK
Oh look,
Clown phobias and fear of frowning faces,
A teenage hand gripping teenage hand,
In case of imminent circus death,
Also, look here,
*DON'T GO ANY FURTHER.
NOT WORTH THE PAIN.

I'm sorry, strong little guy
For all the pain and pressure

You see, it wasn't entirely me,
Wasn't all MY fault

It was all them,
Not me

Ok, that was a slight lie,
Please forgive me

I took things slightly more seriously
Than your blood pumping could ever do

You work my veins
Until they decay

The blood rotten and thick
It drools throughout my flesh

The pressure will take its toll one day
And you will not forgive me for it

When you're far from the fight
Everything will be ok

When the blood runs down your face
And your sights getting blurred
Look to the future
Because only that mind of yours
Can see
What you
Want to

Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?
Poetry doesn't have to rhyme
It doesn't even have to be in time

Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?
People don't have to like you
Even if you like them too

Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?
The question isn't asking who
It's asking chew

But...
Why?
Why?
Why?
**Why?

Don' be scared
Of using those words
In your head
*You're the only one in there

I don't want to act
Like I overreact
But how can I
When I'm dwelling on it
For too long?

So you want to speak music,
You, the bulky headphones freak.

So you want to act dramatic,
You, the shy impish freak.

So you want to be all punk,
You, the neon pink adorned freak.

So you want to be the freak,
You, the coward of the class?

My heart aches
For the May that never came
The prettiest month
The prettiest name
Oh, whoever heard of the friend I've never met
But always miss
It's a strange old thing,
But by far the most true.
I love you, May,
In the friendliest of ways.

I'm in so deep
It's getting hard to tell
What is up and what is down

Sunken eyes
Written lies

Bowed legs
Magnet dregs

Many words
Little herds

Snap,
Shuffle,
Paper,
Flick
Nurse,
Next surgery if you please.
Gloves,
Tools,
Paperwork,
*Fly

Let's take a trip down Memory Lane
Full of fun and games to play
Nostalgic scents
And terrible bruises
The extreme mystery continues

Let's take a trip down-
No wait-
I'd rather-
*Not
Go
There!

The tiniest of seeds
Can turn into the prettiest of trees

007,
A mystery it seems,
Bursting through the trees,
A beautiful woman on each arm,
And shaken martini in hand,
Not stirred,
Suave and extra hot showers,
With all the ladies he's pulled at the bar,
Dancing deadly,
With bullets and bombs,
His enemies growing angry,
At his tech and smooth pick up lines,
007,
A mystery no more.
*James Bond,
Reporting for service, ma'am.

I was told
To tell the truth
But only if
It doesn't hurt people

A little girl
Sidles up to her Mamma
Mama, why shan't I not lie,
When it makes you so cry?

A Mamma is questioned
By a young un' with a little more sense
Than grown ups could ever wish to achieve

A beautiful woman replies,
To her small child with a smile and sheds a tear
Because her baby girl
Speaks with no fear
Of her already questioning conscience

Oh, baby.
I love you.
But please,
Carry on being you,
Because you have an entire lifetime,
To make boys cry.
Do you understand, baby girl?

*Yes, Mama.
Speak the truth-
Make boys cry a salty tear,
And feel no remorse.

I have a heart made of daggers
That could slice your deadbeat life in two
But why should I waste my pity
Spending it all on you?

The rocks don't stop you,
And neither does your prey's sharp teeth.
Gold, silver, grey and blue,
Darting into salty view,
What a lovely shade and hue,
I want to have you for my own,
And yet,
Here you are,
Away from the net,
Dart, dart, darting away,
Wonder of your fluorescent skin,
Smoother than the smallest pin,
A jokers smile is plastered for show,
Swim, swim, swim away.

Painting in the secrets
Of a thousand lies
Is fun
As you get to paint in
How you see those lies

Let's paint our hair red
Of a thousand fires
So fun,
As you get to paint it
How you really want to

Aggressively painting canvases
Of a thousand depictions
It's fun
As you get to paint whatever
How you really see it

*Let's go paint something, sister.
Together.

Here's to growing up,
To the young, the sad and the lonely,
Here's to growing up!
To the fairly old and wrinkled,
Here's to go growing up,
Where life is not so simple,
*Here's to growing up!

Silence deafens the weak and the lonely,
So does it deafen you, my good man?

Seasons change, babe,
Get your winter coat on,
The weather isn't going to bend at your command,
The summer sun hates your weak shine,
The autumn moon despises your crescent smile,
And seasons differ, honey,
Get your head on straight,
Pumpkins are gonna leer,
Get over it, dear,
And snow is gonna fall,
So wrap up, darling, in your knitted shawl,
Seasons change, babe,
Nothings gonna change for you,
Oh, nothing is gonna change,
Seasons are obviously not for you,
Wait for spring, love,
'Coz when push turns to pull,
You'll want to leave seasons behind,
Changing,
Changing forever in your midst.

I wait for the day that I can feel your hand clutch mine.
For the day I can smooth down your hair out of love.
Feel your soft cheeks against mine.
Except I have to wait,
Simply because I do not have a partner yet,
Or know if I can ever hold a little child of my imagination like you in my arms.

Kudos to you for being a soldier.
Kudos to them for fighting for their rights.
Kudos to us for not being afraid (or being afraid for all the right reasons).
Kudos for the children.
Kudos for the adults.
Kudos for the people of earth for surviving yet another day.

I'm just another angry kid to you,
I'm just another kid whose problems
Are just meaningless
In the reality of things.

I'm just another angry kid to you,
I'm just another kid whose problems
Are wrapped around me,
In the tightest shell I could create.

I'm just another angry kid to you.
My problems are *worthless.

I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, ok?
I'm sorry that I acted that way.
I acted irrationally,
Because I thought it was you I should've hated.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
It probably doesn't mean that much.
But I mean it with all of my stubborn, ******* heart.
Will you ever forgive me?
Please?

I want to lock myself away
And never come out again
For fear of the light
And of the people
Who shall criticise
My actions

I may be smiling
But really,
Inside,
I want to scream,
For the hatred I have,
At myself,
For feeling this way.

You smile sadly at the screen.
Watching.
Waiting.

You stare sadly at your thumbs.
Watching.
Waiting.

You laugh sadly at the joke.
Watching.
Waiting.

You watch your reflection sadly.
Watching.
Waiting.

I'm empty inside.
Please stop trying to help.
I'm fine.
I'm just *empty.

Look at this apple.
Rosy and round and seemingly perfect on the outside.
Until you get to the core.
All brown mush and mould;
It's rotten.
*****, stinking rotten.
Don't ever look at the inside again;
That way, you won't feel quite so guilty
About the neat exterior.
Because the way the apple is,
Is not how the apple really is.
Rotten.

Sometimes I get the urge to hug someone,
Really tight,
Not in a romantic way,
Just to feel someone caring for me as I do them,
Their arms like iron bars,
But as I said,
Not in a romantic way,
A way to prove that hugs are awesome,
And completely acceptable to hug for no reason,
Even if it's longer than expected,
Not in a romantic way,
Because I love you, friend,
More than the term friend warrants.
You're my sister.

You truly are the sweetest soul, my dear.

C is for carpal.
Sounds a bit like the word carpet.

T is for tunnel.
Those things that danger is usually in.

S is for syndrome.
Can also be used to describe a lot of things.

Oh honey, please.
I'm so done with your *******.

Expression guarded
Hate hidden

Hands ******
Nails digging in

Heart made of stone
Breaking in two

Insides churning
Head hurting

Emotions wild
I'm an angered child

Tension crackles
Full on tackle

Curled in a ball
Why can't I stand tall?

It's stupid
I'm weak

Truth is a disgusting alibi
*Expression guarded.
Hate hidden.