It was just yesterday I revealed little of myself to you. Then again I changed within hours and discovered a little more of myself.
Standing in the mirror, the reflection and the light flicker. The candle flame added another warm shade as part of me fade away.
A plunge ahead comes with fall to follow, it is easy when we walk slow. The pace of my thoughts is lost, ahead of me in its exploration.
Someday there will be ease, hopefully with more of the inner peace. The sweater will keep me warm, my armour will save me from harm.
So open to the world and vulnerable for a second and more, shields up in moments later. Trust escapes and gets captured in a matter of time.
It is dizzy and not, words in world and too many thoughts. Aging but learning, drowning but burning, the ironies are shining bright.
There is this girl named depression
She doesn't care if I'm happy
She will bring in bad news when i just got in a good mood
She doesn't care if I'm with a good dude
She tells me he just wants me to send nudes
I tell her to leave her presence isn't needed she doesn't listen
She wants to live with me forever
Whoever this may concern if you see her avoid her
but i'm still here
i hope you're happy without me
Was forged in chains
Trapped by our ancestors
To remain untainted for eternity
In the depths
Of a sealed cave
But time conquers
Chains rust away
And when exposed to the sun
In a wisp of crumbling dust
impossible motivate time fade ancestors
Oh to lay right down and fade away,
Close my eyes, forget this day.
To never wake up to this again,
To finally feel in my head sane.
To let go of all on which I held,
To be done with all of which I felt.
To leave without a trace or sign,
Oh well, I’ve had enough time.
“You know what hurts? The fact that you don’t want me the same way I want you. You don’t mind talking to me, but you don’t have the urge and want to talk to me anymore. You don’t mind having a conversation if I message, but you will never want to message. What hurts is that I can see it happening, subtly and gradually. I can see you losing interest in me. I can see those eyes wandering in search of someone else when once they were focused on me. I can feel the distance, I can see you fading.”
- Excerpt from an open letter
When the inky sky holds the sun
She'll pull him closer
The stars dancing in her hair
I'll slowly forget you
Even though I promised never to
I have to
So it doesn't hurt
Turn to black velvet sky
Vast and star-lit
The night will kiss the sun
I love you
Her eyes will shine
With her galaxy tears
And say goodbye
My memories fade
And I whisper goodbye
As you slowly disappear
From my mind
I miss you. 10:57 p.m.
The humming of the wind slowly taking my hope away as I feel myself slowly fading away. Growing tired every second I keep my eyes open fighting myself. Wanting to escape my own mind and just leave to the sky above with the stars that shine bright. Not wanting to fight anymore lays my strained mind. Wanting to let go of the string keeping me from falling into the oblivion. Has my heart and mind finally stopped fighting? Am I finally going to be free? Free from life.
Rain turns fire into steam
Time turns flames into ashes
An evening chill fades embers to coal
And so it was with you
Our burning embers scattered and gave way with the wind
Its times like these i wish i could just fade away. All the worries of the world just gone. I just blow away like crumbled leaves
I yearn to just fade away, carried nowhere but anywhere.