She came back to me.
She left what was comfortable,
In order to be with me once more.
Is this the life she’s ready for?
Neither our farewell nor our meeting,
Were in our hands at any time.
As we say, everything happens
For a reason.
It’s about understanding that reason.
I do not think I will ever know.
Despite my awareness of my love,
That will continue to linger for her.
I’m fearful that I will not be,
The lover she believes me to be.
Since I am weak and unable
To love correctly.
Years went by so normally.
We thought we drifted apart,
But we found our way back
Into each other’s hearts yet again.
Maybe now I am hesitant,
Hesitant because I am broken.
After all, that is what she has know
Throughout the years she has known me.
My sadness will not be fixed.
Even with the world at my fingertips.
Even when my lover is finally mine.
I am feeble and I will continue to be.
Comfort keeps us safe and secure.
Why do I have all power over her?
What if I took my life when I should have,
She’d be comfortable without looking back.
Why did I have to come and interfere,
Something so beautiful and ordinary.
Why does she still love me, tell me
What is there left to love within me.
Why sacrifice yourself for someone,
Who doesn’t even want to be here
Tomorrow or the days that follow.
I cannot continue to take parts of her.
I cannot continue to crush her.
My misery is caused by the pain,
That I have caused her over the years.
What brought her back to my toxicity.
I am a lone wolf, I will die in solitude.
Although I frequently dream of living,
The standard life, it’s not who I am.
And it will never be, so forgive me.