The main theme of this poem is um, triumph
So uh the secondary theme of this poem is defeat?
How could that be? Is that even what a poem is?
Is my life a song? Is this the ******* chorus?

Something crawls up from the drain through the ***** dishes and out of the sink. It grips me! It’s got me!

[This is the part I want to hide]

I saw a man so beautiful
Rarely is there ever a beautiful man--
a man so beautiful you want to kneel
and scream “You’re so beautiful!”
But instead I’ll worship him in the ways he insists:
by stepping aside on the sidewalk,
by laughing at the jokes he steals from me,
by squandering the money he pays me to do his job.

Is my life a song? Is this the ******* chorus?

It took me three to four years to learn
the difference between worshiping and begging,
between faith and belief
And now I have neither and engage in both and yet
My life feels like a free coffee and bagel
My life feels like an unwrapped candy bar
My life feels like a compliment from a stranger
My life feels like a birthday card with cash in it
Is my life a song? Is this the ******* chorus?

This is my once-yearly poem.
It’s like a broken perfume bottle at the bottom of my bag.
Look at it-- read it. Smell it.  Literal swill.  Most things make me feel sad, even more things make me feel threatened, especially this poem.
What is there to do but put my head in my hands?
What is there to say if not sorry?

You don't know me.
I don't know you.

You pass by me,
Every day,
On the crowded streets.
You say hello; I say goodbye.

You serve me food,
Ring up my beer,
Tax my cigarettes.

I give you money,
And your life goes on.

We see each other often.
But you don't know me...

Every shade and every tint
Affects your view
Through the lens of color
The world is new to you

When a color shines so bright
It goes through your brain, right?
through the forge of happy and sad
Color comes out in your vibes

The fast energy of powerful red
The nervous mood of orange

The bright cheer of intense yellow
A peaceful green that is mellow

The relaxing focus of blue
The royal deep of sleepy purple

Colors are everywhere
Around the world
So when you see a color
Bright and bold

The lens of color
Is yours to hold

Is there something I can find
Buried deep in my mind,

An allure which ensures
Me of hope?

So pure and unadorned,
So naked, as was born,

Just a light, just a spark,
That which pulls upon
The heart,

To awaken, and allow
Me to see?

Is there something, buried deep,
Among the feelings I keep,

Is there hope for the one
Who has none?

No more sadness,
No more pain,

No more for a stain,
For a shadow of
What I once had?

No more crying,
No more lying,

No more wishing
I was dying,

Is there hope for the one,
Who has none?

no matter how loud I scream
I still hear nothing
I can't even hear my own voice
no matter how loud I scream