Realize there will come a day
Whether it is a day
A week
A month
Or year
That it's only a matter of time
Til I snap
Finally leave here

It is inevitable but knowing that
Does not change how much I care
It's not worth it anymore
Too deeply broken to repair

I have tried everything I can think of
It seems to be our time to end
Tried to resurrect our love
It refused to fully mend

I have spoken ten thousand words
Must learn to accept and endure
Take from open forgiving hands
Drained empty of all that's good and pure

It hurts to see us work hard
To fall after giving our all
In your heart drugs badly hold a special place
Heed to their nightly call

Your arms slipping off my hips
Grab the high you'll never reach
Regret neglect when I'm gone
At the time hate hearing me preach

It is exactly how described
You wanted it back in your brain
If its what makes you the best
Important to avoiding the shame

You will find a new way to **** your time
To distract from the awful truth
If not you will be forced to live in memories
An excuse to be caged in ignorant youth

You dig an early grave
Worn out
Burnt up
Feeling dead
It takes all motivation
To lie around for days in bed

Somewhere between give and take
Took your time and took your heart
Taking for granted the pictures we've taken
Cannot take much more before I depart

I find my familiar resolve weakening
You know it doesn't take much
Wish I could resist your magic
I'm not immune to your touch

I have accepted we'll never see eye-to-eye
Would give up all possessions to do that though
We both know that's not a lot
What would that even show?

And I'm slowly pushed away
All I long for is to be close
Why do I feel so unwanted
By one I love the most?

I want to show you
Just how much you mean to me
Want to say "you're perfect"
Although you don't agree

I have never been closer to heaven
True love my amazing escape
This life is rampant with suffering
Unsteady against your shape

I wish I expressed better
The love caught in my heart
Blind to my adoration
Emotions from the start

I am aware that I have caused you pain
It never was my intention
Wanted what was best for us
Not the tremendous resulting contravention

The only way to earn trust back fully
To make every decision based on you
The scars we've left on eachother
Fade into ones we never knew

I hope it is not too late to tell you
Sorry for all the heartache
Soul is incomplete without yours
Fall apart without your hand to take

Keep surprising me a zillion ways
Can't get better than this
Life with my best friend
One who gives my life purpose

That is all I need to be happy
Touch of your lips and your laughter
Conversations shared in the dark
You're simply my happy-ever-after

We take turns being selfish
The painful tug-of-war we play
Back-and-forth pull our relationship
But love is not a game

Around you feel vulnerable
Chest is ripped open wide
Hands hold eachothers hearts
And full
Bodies unbalance and collide

We make love
Walls come crashing down
Hearts are relit with fire
In the intensity I drown
Consumed by desire

You wrap arms around me
In front of guys
As if they'll catch my beauty
Try to steal your prize

When we are alone I feel so small
Demeanor reminding I'm insignificant
How is the one who causes my self-worth to fall
The same person who made me feel magnificent?

The distance between grows more every day
So sick of being used
The lies that push me further away
The reason my heart is bruised

Baby I know I am awful to you as well
Do not want to break your heart
Make your life a living hell
I've become a master of the art

Way too many mistakes tossed aside
Neither of us can truly amend
You remember how many incidents I let slide
Suppose my forgiveness was only pretend

Because resentment slowly built
Time passed
I couldn't see it til it was too late
I could never quite let go of the past
Start over with a blank slate

It is not so simple to forget what we had
Every day to memories am exposed
How do you heal and stop being sad
When wounds never fully closed?

Every time we gently touch
Feel sunshine in your hand
That warm moment
Almost more than I can stand

Hot morning comes swiftly without fail
Am here to fight another day
Tuck my hair behind my ear
Alone makes me during feel okay

Your presence makes life a lot less hard
Whole heart belongs to you
Don't feel tangible all by myself
Cannot believe things I thought I knew

Cause I do not trust my senses anymore
Wanna believe what I feel
Lately your skin is the only thing
I can be positive is real

Friendship is not just a word
More than hanging out
Who you've come to rely on
Trust without a doubt

Known from beginning
More than length of time
About who has your back through thick and thin
Help bury a body and cover up the crime

A friend:
Someone who came into
Life when you needed them most
Others left you alone in pain
Remained while everyone else was a ghost

Life is hard
But even harder alone
Remember you are blessed
Have a friend who sticks around
Has truly passed the test

All I know has failed me
Caused me grief and pain
They say I should have learned by now
That the fault lies in my brain

I will try to correct my thinking
Disconnect some wires in my head
So that instead of being hopeful
I'll just suspect the worst instead

I hurt on a daily basis
So maybe it's time to accept
Redirect the patterns in my mind
So that agony I will expect

Roses are perfectly red
Violets are perfectly blue
Swear that I'm perfect also
I know that's not true
I tried being her
Girl your eyes see
I can't change
Still the same me
Roses will always be red
Violets will always be blue
Know I will never
Be enough for you

Once I climb into my bed
My monsters all awaken
But when I sleep next to your side
I swear those beasts are shaken

And when I hold your body close
Imagine a future much better
To find the right way to get there
We must navigate together

I felt heaven for a breif moment
It's contained inside your kiss
I must admit you are the only thing
That touches my world with bliss

I know there are chores to be done
Laundry pile is growing large and looming
The corner of my room overcrowded
Bin sits and as I wait it's blooming

I fear there be dishes in the sink
If I listen close I can hear
Cry out my name shamelessly
I try not to get too near

I am not blind to the layer of dust
All objects on my bedside table
Mom wasn't lying when she remarked
"This coated house is disgusting!"
"It looks like a stable!"

But don't feel like doing anything
Washing dishes
Or clothes
Or cleaning
I think I'll just lose myself
Some deeper meaning

I'm sad and hate who I've become
Everything is caving in
Because I'm all out of options
I don't know how to win

And if I'd face the awful facts
For one day in my life
I'd see that the only way out
Would be to end everything with a knife

Do good
Good will come to you
Positivity can only return times two

The worst part waking up each day
Realizing my life is still this way
I want to change
Be something more
Don't want breathing to feel like a chore
With a man who does best to make
Smile though his I only take
I am a thief
Happiness and joy
What I steal I don't get to keep and enjoy
I know wishing others to understand
Make them see it from where I stand
I just **** them with destructive habit
In pursuit of an unreachable white rabbit
I am sick of picking scabs on my face
Screaming to world that I am a disgrace
But distance between where I am at
Where I was
Is a reminder that
Nothing but the loneliness feels the way it once did
Am so hardened
My feelings I hid
Because no effort is ever good enough
No longer try
But I'm failing to bluff
They asked if okay
If I'm sure I'm alright
Lie but it's clear that my answers not right
Nothing hurts because I've gone numb
The awful monotony I've all but succumbed
Rock bottom and bottoms up!
Where I'm stuck between
Each day follow the same sickening routine

Verse 1:
Our eyes meet
Feel the heat
Have to take a seat
For a beat
I can't speak
Can't even breathe
You sweetly sweep me
Off my feet completely
Weak in the knees
Can't help but stare at your back
Hoping you'll look up and stare at me back
I would approach you but I lack the tact
Fuckboys all that I attract
Does not take a genius to see that
Out of my league and that's a fact
Working up nerve to make some sort of sound
That exact instant you turn around
I tell by your smile you feel the butterflies flutter
In your gut
Get up
Put one foot in front of the other
Strut towards me
I am struck
Muscles melting like butter
Ask for a light
My voice is stuck
But I stutter
A muttered reply
****** up
Not even drunk or high
You ignite not just your cigarette
But a fire inside
Exciting sides of me I thought had died
I can't hide

Hook:
I'm a spacebound rocketship and your heart's the moon
And I'm aiming right at you
Right at you
250,000 miles on a clear night in June
And I'm so lost without you
Without you

Verse 2:
I finally feel like I have reason to live
Maybe an angel like you could forgive
For the things I couldn't give
For all of the dumb things I did
****
No joke
I tripped over you and fell
Too deep of water to swim so I flail
For a moment forget where I am and can't tell
Apart from copycats imitating well
Be exactly like us
They want to excel
In a phony heaven but life is really hell
Scream my color but the world is black and white
And backdrops move but you remain in my sight
But you found me alright
The truth in dead of night
Like a screenplay I might write
And for once get it right
Sitting there in front of me like I got my happy ending tonight
I felt simple for the first time in my over-complicated life

(Hook)

Verse 3:
Processing in your head what the **** I just said
Marriage is a concept way over your head
So you reject my proposal with a shake of your head
and break my heart as easily as you break communion bread
Walk all your good intentions out the door instead
If you don't want to spend your life with me you might as well be dead
Alas the long awaited impending end has arrived with dread
I grasp at missed chances but every last one has fled
My mind keeps on warping
How much more can it bend?
Till it finally is broken?
Hoping for days tears will end and peace will be awoken
I toss and leave my fears with you to keep as a token
Use silence because this time goodnight is better left unspoken

Bridge:
I should have never expected you to feel the same
I shall embrace the misery and face the constant pain
Escape from day to day sorrow and give in to the stress
While body sleeps my brain will fly away and reminisce

(Hook)