Wednesday, 9:12 p.m.
that I'm pretty
and I wish
that you were here
My fragile bones
feel likes stones
and crying beneath my skin.
and I just think
I could make you
I don't know why
But right now
I'm drunk and high
And I miss you
once upon a time,
and a dreaming dwarf
stood in the face
of a broken looking glass.
a short, vague piece. insecurity at its finest.
I don’t want to be constantly afraid you're going to leave me or change your mind.
I don’t want you to treat me poorly.
I don’t want to know if there are other girls, if I am unspecial.
I don’t want to /be/ unspecial.
I don’t want to love you when you only want me around for reasons that have nothing to do with me.
I don’t want to exist only in my car, in the dark, in your drunkenness and sadness.
I don’t want to always feel as though I have to convince you to see me.
In short: I want to be wanted, which I am not.
they all got that new phone
that just came out last week
and with that and their cars,
they have noodles to eat
updating their socials
while at work at their job
and living so "healthy"
with a case of Top Ramen
and e-books on self-help
a whole nation arranged
not to think, but consume
if this is our future, I'd say
we're all doomed
the moon lights up the night sky so bright that I am sure the sun is envious
all I wish to do is run barefoot in a forest
yelling nothing to no one
one day I will be able to hug the moon in its entirety, until my heart becomes so full i'm afraid it will jump out of my chest
but until then
I will crane my neck to stare up at her
and in her brightness she will stare back
until my eyes burn to the point that I enjoy it
and at this moment
we are one
It has been almost a month
A month since my heart has been broken
Broken in a million pieces
Pieces of me still love you
You where the only one that I could talk to
To you I said everything I want to talk about
About that day I had, but not that one
One day of my life has never been so bad
So bad that it broke me in two
Two people made one, you and I
I will never forget you
You where *are the love of my life
Life we were shearing together
Together we were happy
Happy like that, I'll never be again
Again I hate my life
Life that I resented so much
So much that I wanted to commit suicide
Suicide, was the only thing I could think of, until I met you
You were the one that saved me from death
Death is what I think about again
Again, I am in that ****** place in my head
Head first, I went into that relation
Relations are supposed to last
Last month you broke my heart
My heart will never be the same again
Again I want to die
I think I know what I want now,
The purpose I've been seeking,
But what do I know until I try,
And who's willing to offer their time?
Well I mean, there is one guy but we've been talking for months and its going incredibly slow. I'm not sure if he's into me.
Don't bet the Devil your head
You'll end on the crossroads
Where you met
Asking for it back,
But he'll never return your favor.
Better savor sanity while you got it
Cause you sure glorified insanity,
Bettin' the Devil your head.
A man walks into a bar and
doesnt walk out
you walk into a bar
and you dont walk out
and you think maybe thats how it happened
he just walked into a bar
and never walked out
walked into a knife
walked into the barrel of a gun
walked into a river with cinderblock shoes
walked into a car and didn’t turn back
walked into your life and right back out
you stumble out of a bar
cursing and crying and
crashing into the pavement but
that doesn’t matter
you feel like dying
imagine that you slip and fall apart until you’re just a puddle
imagine that you slip through the lines in the concrete
through the roots and the earth
live down there instead
you’re still here
crying on the ****** sidewalk in front of a ****** bar with whisky on your shirt and your breath and something cold and sharp in your heart
and that’s not the problem so much as
he isn’t here too
Even car wrecks are better in pairs