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In the jungle,
on the islands.
In my bedroom,
on my dumb *.

I get a text.
I need a tattoo.

A real tattoo;
a Lola's wrinkled hands slapping my thigh,
laying me over banana leaf,
then hammering long needles in my chest-
maneuvering a horn, a bone, a citrus thorn,
tap, tap, tap, tap,
sketching wounds to fill with soot.

A muted barb,
a slight prickling of skin,
then sinking, stamping, slipping-
through blood,
through muscle,
through bone.
Staining, stripping, splitting-
scraping at my inside-sun.

That’s what my grace has been feeling like.
That’s what my shame has been reeling like.

I deleted the poems.
I deleted the messages,
I tried to delete the flutter.
I want to cry but nothing comes out
my tongue is so big,
I have too many teeth.

My lungs feels the way mercury looks
pouring into a petri-dish.
Kind of trippy. I didn't even trip.
My surface is all salt and peppery,
numb, infinite,
and so, so stringy.

A man told me secrets and I didn’t flinch.
Then he got mad,
Maybe because I didn’t flinch.
Maybe because he can’t not wreck things.
I didn't flinch, so he threw *
at the wall;
a bowl of puttanesca, cute frosted cakes,
oily tabouli, slippery tteokkbokki.

We watch it drip, drip down,
until scraps and broken plates tye-dye the baseboard.
I didn’t move to clean it up,
he didn’t move to explain.
We didn’t groove to call it art.
This is, of course, a metaphor;
we don't share a wall,
I haven’t made tabouli in years.

okay. okay. okay. okay.
It’s almost funny but not there yet.
Should we laugh about this or catalog it in our dark days?
but to catalog, you'd have to stay.

You said you weren’t scared.
I said I was glad.
I said you’re big and I’m small and we might fit perfectly.
You agreed. That was before you got mad.

Something inside you is reigning rabid-
We knew this.
I am rascally and rare.
We knew this too.
My feelings are so, so big.
Can you see them in shop-windows while you walk your city?
Can you hear them while you shower, or
smell them in your coffee grounds?

That feeling again-
That Old-World ink.
That heavy-heart sink.
The static slander of my skin,
the catty condensation of my brain.
Everything inside is lava lamp-holographic,
and everything outside is pin pin pin pin.
Lola, please keep hammering.
I still feel tacky but your needles
gather up the strings.

It's not decorative:
I'm hoping it's erosive.
I'll bow down deep;
elbows up, eyes down;
an apology for not flinching
when you thought I should have.
Eros bowed out, you're not staying.
I'll bow again- it's twice for the dead.

On this island,
it's just me, that Lola,
her long needles, and my big feelings.
She can hammer them back into me
And I won't flinch.
SomeOneElse Dec 2021
I feel like I was just dumped
Weighed, measured & rejected
Unfriended & discarded
It was so unexpected
My heart's broken into pieces
My love has been deleted
Feels like I wasn't good enough
I'm completely defeated
I don't want to leave my room
Don't want to leave my bed
I simply cannot find the strength
I wish that I were dead
I had 4 months of happiness
And now it is all gone
How could something felt so right
Turn out to be so wrong
My heart's broken into pieces
My love has been deleted
Feels like I wasn't good enough
I'm completely defeated
She may not have dumped.me but it sure feels like it
Jasmin jazz May 2021
She stood there staring at nothing
Thoughts were swirling around
Head was pounding at a thousand speed
All she knew was it had died

IT was born five years back
On a fine sunday afternoon
She cradled IT and took care of IT
Yet it lost its cost because of him

IT was her only hope and her
Only reason to exist in world
Nothing could spare its importance
But IT died because of him

She stared at the dead corpse
She knew IT will never be alive
Her heart weighed ten thousand pounds
Now she's pale and broken because of him

Someone walked in and asked her
"What had happened to you?"
She was so weak to answer
Yet she said "IT died.. five years old"

"Er...Sorry for that.. What's IT's name?"
Her vision blured.. Yet murmured
"Love" she said ".....he lied to me"
Someone walked away with a sigh...
she's    broken
she   was  dumped
she      cried    aloud
no one  did  . care
all     that   left
was dark and
black
.
She was happy until then.. She believed him blindly.. Even she closed her eyes to some of his cute naughtiness.. Yet he didn't realised how amazing she was... What a pity!!! He don't deseve her😇
Brave Wilson Jun 2020
He still try to impress her, but why?
A priority he is not, a fact shes all but proven.
Her words and her actions,
Like puzzles from a jigsaw,
with no  pieces in the center.
Yet he clings on her words,
with hope down to his soul.
He's condemned the religious man
for blindly following God,
who does nothing to prove he's real
and condemned the very same God
on a count of faith being a liability.
And like a cruel twist of fate
in his own Life's Journey,
the only way he can attain,
A sense of joy is by the faith
that she'll someday let herself love him
as he's so clearly shown he loves her.
A joke it is really, when this condition was set,
with his afterlife on Libras scales,
He weighed his mortality wasn't worth a simple maybe,
but now a maybe holds more stock,
then his heart saying he should stop!..
He can't even contemplate choosing
himself over a girl that disregards him,
And all he can care about
is which choice will ensures her smile won't see doubt.

Pathetic isn't it.
- I think the poem mostly speaks for itself, but yeah this is how I felt about someones daughter.
Paul Butters Jun 2020
I told you so!
It must have been a blow
When she let you go.

I said from the start
She was a wicked ****
With an icy heart.

When will we learn?
Please don’t think I’m stern:
She should go to hell and burn.

It’s time to move on,
Sing a different song
Onto pastures new -
You know
What you have to do.

Right now you feel broken –
You know I ain’t joking.
Time will heal,
No matter how bad you feel.

Be more careful next time,
Don’t be the victim of crime.
Sure, you must risk being hurt
Before you can wear the shirt
Of someone loved so true
Just for being you.

Yes, I told you so,
But now you have to let go
And continue the show.

But please listen next time
We see any bad sign
And all should be fine.

Never give up –
You can drink from that cup.
She’s out there for you
And you know what to do.
Just do it.
As though you never blew it.
Rise as high as you can,
There’s a good man.

Paul Butters

© PB 10\6\2020.
Some "pop music lyrics"...
Zack Ripley Jun 2019
Today, I found you crying on the stairs.
I asked if you were okay.
You asked me why I cared.
So I sat down beside you.
I said "I know you didn't ask for one, but you look like you could use a friend."
I asked again "what's wrong? Are you okay?"
You said "I'm fine. Just go away!"
I looked in your eyes and only saw pain and fear. So I said "we don't have to talk. But I'm not going anywhere."
You groaned and put your head in your knees.
Finally, you looked up and said "want to know what happened? Fine!
I found out my boyfriend cheated on me. When I confronted him, he said he never loved me and I needed to leave. Is that what you want to hear?!"
"No. I'm sorry that happened. Do you have any friends or family near?"
"No. And I don't have any money either."
"Alright. Before you say it,
I know you have no reason to trust me. But if you want, you can stay with me."
"Why are you being so nice to me? Why do you care?"
"Years ago, I had a friend who had gone through
a traumatic experience
and I wanted to help her.
I thought she could heal
if she talked to me about it.
I pushed her too hard
And she yelled at me.
So I yelled back.
I was angry so I left
and ignored her pleas
to come back.
Found out later she
Killed herself.
I don't know if anything would have changed if I stayed.
But I wish I didn't get angry
And walk away."
Amanda Kay Burke Jan 2020
This is *******
You have no right
Give me your love and then take it back
What makes you think hurting me
Will help get my life on track?

Did you think that breaking my heart
Would give motivation and drive?
Since you left can't think
I can't sleep
Hardly a person
Barely alive

You are ****** up if you think you did the right thing
You think I'm the one in the wrong
You are the ******* who gave me no warning
Out of the blue you said "so long!"

I feel sorry for you
You believe
This is the way for me to evolve
You obviously have issues
That are too big for me for to solve
An old one
Amelia Sapp Dec 2019
aphrodite gifted me her beauty
but i call upon her to let known,
the smoke that fills my lungs
and the fire that lies in your wake

ares gifted me her ruthlessness
but i call upon her to let known,
the war you started within me
and how untamed i became

athena gifted me her wisdom
but i call upon her to let known,
the thoughts i still have of you
and how skilled you are at being persistent

eleos gifted me her compassion
but i call upon her to let known,
how i still feel pity for myself
and how i wish to mercy you for your misdeeds

these women do not live within me to make me
a weaker version of myself
they live within me
to make me strong
in your absence
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