NTR 31m

I don't feel the same love as before
I don't smile when i see you anymore
I used to show up to dates early
I used to make strange jokes to seem quirky
I used to act perky when i was hurting
because you were flirting
with some other guy and i was worried

you don't feel the same love as before
You don't make time to see me anymore
you've started to flake where you used to be late
texting me it must've been something you ate
then i saw you that same evening at dinner eating
with that guy and you were beaming
I couldn't believe in what I was seeing.
Because you, who gave me meaning, a reason for living, were cheating.
I had trouble breathing and then suddenly i was fleeing the scene and I was screaming and beating myself until i was bruised and I was bleeding.

We don't feel the same love as before,
I got complacent and you got bored,
while i was still sore from what i just saw
I called you over just to show you the door,
and I'm sure I don't want to see you anymore

katalyn Mar 2014
c+k

Lonely is the day.
Lonely is the night
Weary is the wanders light.

Sad is the moments.
Sad is the dates.
Two souls fates.

Long is the weeks.
Long is the years
An ocean of tears.

Two paths will soon
clash.

without warning.
without reason.
Does love need a season?


Unannounced.
Unnamed.

The search is over.
The search is complete.
The wanders find a name.

But all they could ever leave behind
Was C+K carved in a tree.

We were hopeful once. I loved you once. No longer

if you were not to love me
you would at least feel bad for me
i wanted you in my life even if it meant pity
you don't understand how i molded my lungs around your arms
and my security around your spine
the bending of yours fueled the shatter of mine

i miss you
i am sorry
love with bpd is hard
everything is my fault
i was too much

Till death do us part
You'll forever hold my heart
Just listen to it slowly break
From devastation in our wake *
○◘○◘○
As each day goes past
Our personalities differ in contrast
We were once so enraptured
Now my soul has been captured
○◘○◘○
There is no more you and me
I refrain from any duplicity
I just gotta have you back
Get my life back on track*

As the title suggests, of all my poems, this was the only one saved as a draft.
A poem I wrote in the dark but never submitted, so here it is.

If I could go back in time
I'd go back to September 4th, 2017
If I could go back in time
I'd stop you from leaving
If I could go back in time
I'd set my mind straight
If I could go back in time
I'd make there be no meaning to that date
If I could go back in time
I'd protect you from my mistakes
If I could go back in time
We'd still be together till this day;

You

I adore you
I worship you
I want you
I need you
I taste you
I feel you
I hear you
I kiss you
I touch you
I feel you
I miss you
no more

Sal A 2d

Doesn't it hurt?
When I say no?
When the words finally spurt?
Doesn't it make you jealous when I glow?

On the brink of breakup.
When the end seems to arrive inevitably.
When you pray for us to makeup.
But show it ever so surreptitiously.

I remember when life was simpler.
When you fought with fists and not words.
When you weren't an emotional stickler.
Now we yearn for school trips, like nerds.

Dark moments make the good ones brighter.
Maybe that's why I fight through quarrels like this.
To see you recover from your issues like a fighter.
How do we get through it: say "Sorry" and kiss.

Our wedding license was
Just a promissory note;
A thing a compulsive
Liar once wrote.
Something Billy Jack
Once said, in short,
"Written so you could
Get out of it in court."

I find myself saying
When it's all said and done
"What  are you, anyway,
A secret republican?"
I thought it was just political
But, you devious little cuss,
Your sidewinding ways
Have slopped over into us.

A one-sided marriage
Is what we have now.
I put up with it all this time
But please don't ask me how.
It has been rather like you
Don't know what marriage is for
So write this down someplace:
I'm not gonna take it anymore.

One person by himself
Simply cannot make a pair.
Hey saddest thing of all
Is I doubt did you will care.
A month or two from now
Or maybe further on
You might look up and discover
That half your team is gone.

We were drinking coffee when
depression showed up at the door of the home we built, pounding.
Eviction notice in hand,
your soul parceled out into donation bins.
Foreclosure sign,
caution tape around the chest that I slept on for a year.

I sit out in the sun
to bleach the tan line from my ring finger.
I hold cold cups and shake strangers’ hands
to erase the mould of your hand from mine.
I want to sear off my palms.

I miss even those nights when you looked at my fire and laughed.
So I make you coffee (but I know I make it wrong);
your ghost in this house still criticizes.

I made you coffee every day because it was all I could do;
my only way of getting into you, a vector.
As the hot brew flowed past your heart, I watched,
like a child at Christmas, hoping you’d feel my love.
Hoping the glaze would clear up from your eyes.

I went to the doctor about this dizziness.
He checked my ears, he asked why my eyes were red.
This vertigo--a hurricane made by the page turning in my life.
I am a bag in your wind.

The day you left I wrote you a recipe for how you like your coffee,
because you don’t know, but I have it memorized.
My handwriting changes halfway down the page, as I change,
as you drive farther and farther away.

Because my name has been yours, possessive.
And although these days I correct myself and say ‘I’ during speech,
My thoughts are still ‘we.’
I still think about your lungs when I cough.

So I still make us coffee every day (but I know I make it wrong).

sarah 2d

i’d like to start this off saying
thank you.
thank you for making me feel
whole and
appreciated and
important and
loved.
thank you for giving me the
same feeling i get looking up at
the night sky when i looked
into your eyes,
thank you for holding me
when i thought i’d never
stop shaking,
thank you for making me believe
that everything will work out
one day.

maybe we didn’t work out in the end.
maybe we weren’t meant to be.
and as much pain as leaving each other
is causing me, i’d never undo my time
with you.  
you taught me so much
about myself
about others
about love.
from the bottom of my heart,
thank you for that, and
i wish you every happiness.

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