Carina 1d

When the world comes crashing in,
Washing over you like the tide;
When you have nothing left to win,
And want to give up on your fight.

When you don't see the caring beauty,
In the eyes of those you love;
When you feel like agony's booty,
Standing on the edge, away one shove.

When you can't see a spark of light,
After days of pouring rain;
When you keep on saying you're alright,
While your heart is forced to bane.

When you have no one to hold onto tight,
Because life has left on you its mark;
When you can't look on the bright side,
I will sit with you in the dark.

Cloe 22h

I will no longer surrender my tears to you.

I will surrender them to someone who deserves them.

I am incredibly humbled that my poem has been chosen to be displayed on the front page. Thank you so very much.

this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i wrote you a poem
i haven't written in so long
that spiders have claimed their home
at the crook of my right palm
i try not to pick a pen up
just so i won't disturb them
but this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i want to write you a poem
although i have forgotten every stored metaphor
every beautiful way to say,
'you have a really nice laugh'
and i can't seem to remember
all the subtle ways to say,
'i want to be there for you'
you see, this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i will write you a poem
because i have never really been good
at saying the right thing at the right time
but somehow
i have discovered the Lost and Found
between my mouth and my hands
where the words i have lost on my lips
have been found on my fingertips
hesitating to write them
this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i want to tell you
you don't have to be alone
and carrying heavy things is always easier
with someone else to help lift the weight
don't you think that the world is too heavy
to be carried all on your own shoulders?
maybe that is why
i always see you
with your back hunched to the ground
let me help
for it is how i have chosen to show my love for you
because for a while i have thought
that i had nothing left in me
but maybe i still have little pieces left
and i will find them
so i can help put you back together again
i hope you see
that this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
because for the longest time
i have been afraid to write
but this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i wrote you a poem

dedicated to my dear friend, who is having a hard time right now. this is how i have chosen to show my love and support for you. :*

It was dark and cold
(Night's end on my end)
While I told off my troubles
To a friend.

I had thought I had me
figured out,
but,
darn it all,
I went and changed again


Half a world away,
I heard him sigh.
He said,

Listen now,
you still stay the same somehow,
that's the core-
And exactly this should
be accepted and loved,
at least by yourself


So I suppose what keeps me,
me,
in the end,
is more or less confusion,
And a wealth of careless wisdoms
from distant friends.

all i have is my laughter
because i'm the idiot with trust issues
the idiot who trusts everyone and
they hurt me every time and
i still come back for more!
it's my fault:
i let him bend me over,
hand locked in my hair,
grinning and lovebit and vulnerable.
and right then he thrust a knife into my back.
i can still feel the blade
twisting and snarling and making fun of
the girl with the bloody holes
framing her spine.
no i know, it's my fault
because i trust no one even though i trust everyone
and i trust that i'll trust again
for you i was a flame...
and i can be again i know i can
because i live in this bruise of a cycle
and i can't seem to break out of it
so i get backstabbed and live to tell the tale,
again and again and again

You are a diamond in a sea of coal,
with cracks and flaws obtained through your journey.
a truly beautiful soul,
That’s wading through a corrosive flurry.
I am you, you are me,
when they drop you im there to catch you,
but you never see.
that instead of dropping you could have flew.
and so I nurse your wounds,
and hope that next time you will soar,
away from the hounds,
forever more.
so that your diamond of a heart,
so strong yet so weak.
will some day depart,
no longer meak.
so that amidst the world of coal,
you will find another,
and match your souls.
And become eachothers buffer.

It may be cliche but its for you. thank you for being there for me. i will always be by your side to help you out!
ix.

maybe i had so much
truth and you were
scared of that too

I remember
Laughing until we couldn’t breathe
In the back of my mom’s car
And I remember
How just a month before
I started struggling with self harm

I remember
Laughing until I couldn’t breathe
Over the phone as you drove your car
And I remember
How just a day later
You would loose a friend

I remember
Crying together over the phone
Feeling so angry and helpless
And I remember
How just a few months before
You cut again

I remember
Crying while we texted
And asking you why it hurt so much
And I remember
How you told me
It was because my heart was too big


I remember
Telling you about the life
That died inside of my mom
And I remember
How the night of your 16th birthday
You almost died

I remember
Telling each other
That one day life would get better
And I remember
How we both wanted to die
More than we wanted to live

I remember
Holding each other for hours
Because we were both falling apart
And I remember
How no one else knew
That you were the only reason I was still alive

I remember
Holding you after months
Of pain and not communicating
And I remember
How small you felt
In my arms despite your height


I remember
Eating steak and pancakes together
In your kitchen at midnight
And I remember
How you were the only one
Who ever noticed when I lost weight

I remember
Eating cake on my 18th birthday
And how you wore a unicorn onesie
And I remember
How aware I was of the fact
That neither of us thought we’d see that day

I remember
Watching LOTR at your house
Screaming when Legolas was on screen
And I remember
How much fun I had
Despite my recent diagnosis

I remember
Watching you on stage
As you were your final and best role
And I remember
How we met in the very same place
9 and 10 with too much pain between us


I remember
Talking to you about Star Wars
While we were supposed to play kickball
And I remember
How you were the only person
Who never told me to shut up

I remember
Talking together on your couch
While our dads talked in the kitchen
And I remember
How we both talked
And listened just as much as we needed

I remember
Writing poems for each other
Because email could cross the distance
And I remember
How words couldn’t really express
The fear you felt in your own home

I remember
Writing Brightsoul for the first time
Because you had named me Lightheart
And I remember
How those names were wishes
And promises of what we saw past the pain


I remember
Missing you so much
My insides felt all cut up and bleeding
And I remember
How hearing your voice
Was enough to get me through the week

I remember
Missing all the good things
Your parents ought to have given you
And I remember
How we fed fish and ducks
And tried to figure out how to make it better

I remember
Feeling so sad I couldn’t move
So I stayed on the couch the whole day
And I remember
How proud of you I was
When your name followed “Highest Honors”

I remember
Feeling each other’s hands
In our hair as we styled it for fun
And I remember
How scared you were
As we hid in your room when that man came


I remember
Knowing the names
Of all the men who’d ever hurt you
And I remember
How much I wanted to run
To your house to punch your father’s face

I remember
Knowing the same God
That had never once left us
And I remember
How you pulled me behind you
To protect me from that oncoming vehicle

I remember
Growing older with you
But still loving unicorns the same
And I remember
How you were never really
As young as you should have been

I remember
Growing the unicorn
That you brought back from Florida
And I remember
How we named a turtle Andy
In the midst of my two good months


I remember
Leaving the flip flops I bought at the mall
At your house all summer
And I remember
How you cried
When I kissed your forehead goodnight

I remember
Leaving abusive friendships
Was something we both had to do
And I remember
How “We Don’t Have To Dance”
Was a song we could both feel ourselves in

I remember
Smiling was something we were both
Really good at faking
And I remember
How you were the only person
Who could make me believe I was cute

I remember
Smiling as I gave you a puzzle
For Mother’s day that had glitter on it
And I remember
How you made me fancy hot chocolate
With your love and Starbucks skills


I remember
Breaking down at 3AM
And thinking I must be loosing my mind
And I remember
How the thought of you kept me alive
For one more night in Mordor

I remember
Breaking your own microwave was
Something you thought of doing to see me
And I remember
How time didn’t heal like we thought it would
But somehow it was okay

I remember
How bad always followed good
And life always followed death
How I cried more than I laughed
But always felt better with you
How you heard more lies than truth
But believed what I told you
And how somehow we were still together
And somehow we stayed alive
And how no matter what I always knew that
You
Are my best friend and
I
Am your Sam and
Together
I think
We’ll be okay because
We
Are Lightheart and Brightsoul and
They
Remember

For my Brightsoul, always <3

42 miles
and I wish I was there
42 miles
and they’re painful to me
42 miles
and you need me right now
42 miles
and they’re painful to you
42 miles
and I’d fly if I could
42 miles
and they’re torture to me
42 miles
and you’d run if you could
42 miles
and they’re torture to you
42 miles
and I wish they were two
42 miles
and they’re breaking me
42 miles
and you need me right now
42 miles
and they’re killing you

3/4/16
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