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Nov 2019 · 410
I disassociate to my "friends" lives scrolling by,
I don't need any spliff or fungus to reach
Peak apathetic  non self congruence.
Watching years pass by in seconds
Is all the psychedelic room temperature
Mental priming for my primate mental
That I could ever hope for

Before being snapped back out
By the cubed carrot reward of
Internet interaction
Which keeps me salivating and searching
For ways to increase the amount of time
I don't have to associate with that guy inhabiting my body
For a while I can see my problems as goners
Being slowly erased from my mind like a magnet over a hard drive

Until a kindly panic attack reminds my of
My lack of lack of control
And the selfless self centered guilt keeps me
Wishing I were working instead of living
Who could be so audacious
As to propose a life out side
Sep 2019 · 190
Each time I shave my face,
I scrutinize with my eyes,
To look for my mistakes,
But my eyes, they fraternize,
With the enemy on my chin,
And so, too late,
When on a date,
I feel them with my fingers
Apr 2019 · 2.1k
Ocursed Cusses
The chicken baulked, "Phaulk!"
Before Latin chose to roll around,
And the "Librarian's sound, it"
Has been through pursed lips
Oedipus was clapping cheeks,
Long before Middle English clapped any,
When lions and tigers and bares
Were the prime predators
Even in The Garden,
Snake said as,
As snakes say as,
Where the language of choice I know,
Not to be English.
And if your dainty, sky-locked eyes soul and mind,
Remain unfazed by kid killers, or rampant rapers,
But try to censor my ******* ****?
Apr 2019 · 212
Im lonely
The wind has come to comfort me
Perhaps not in
Or whatever you people to tell me to snap back to
But i'm glad I don't feel alone

I can watch the pretty girls' funny shows on Netflix all night
Who's words weren't written with them in mind
Or any mind for that matter
Or who's shows aren't even "theirs"

Hopefully my puffs of bright beaming teeth breath
Fuel these winds onward
To someone else with worse problems
Or better
So be it
Apr 2019 · 235
I cannot wait
I really can't

If I ever get married
If God has that in my stars

God, will it be great

There's no distance I wouldn't go for them

Pain now is temporary
And those eyes will always hold a glint for me
I will--am chasing that glint
Until I belong to them,
And they want to belong to me

Until that silver shines through me
My eyes, my nose, my mouth,

Until that light reflects back
Brighter to them
Than my open, vulnerable, enamored,
Eyes received them
Though I know I'll never believe it if they say so


I can see it now,
Can you?
The flash from their eye?
As quick as their breeze walking past,
But twice as warming
Now their smile!
A smile
I would bear the rest of my life
If only at my final conscious sight
I would see it
In person
**** me sidewase-- sidewise apparently,
i can't get a word in between these red dots and
Red snakes biting at my letters's ankles
At least when I'm pen ning I have the option to ignore that im an *******

You **** gobbling weak kneed slack jawed fool

Alright Alright let's take it easy I'm simply trying to help
No one would ever doubt your genius
But your spelling can certainly take a little
Is that how you

Dont patronize me **** it
Mar 2019 · 129
I don't prefer one hour over another,
They choose how to arrange themselves autonomously,
3am, My
Body and mind have taken some offense,

Then again
Who better than me?
A white man
Who knows no hubris
No boundary
To try?

But then again
I cannot
I cannot explain more than simply it is wrong

Exasperated I stare at the stars
Tears running to the back of my head
Covering themselves out of shame
Trying to apologize
For sins I cannot wash
Off hands
That are not mine
That are not sorry
That are buried

I turn to the ground
For two reasons

Finally remove,
As God decreed
That which causes me to sin
Is a finger removed when it is worn to the bone?
I'll tell you in a few

To reach those graves
To **** those men personally

who cares
Feb 2019 · 136
The back of my eyes feel wet,
And the hot-cocoa after sledding,
Warmth in my chest wouldn't go away,
My head feels magnetized to my stomach,
With my nose pulling my head downward.

My hair irritates my skull,
As the clammy underside of my skin,
Grips who i am,
My very essence,
In a fishy death hold that refuses to,
Let me transcend those feet,
And feel the warm,
And magenta crimson skyline,
Of a distant plane.
Feb 2019 · 140
My hand writes when it is sleepy,
Though my pin prickled pal pays me no tithe,
The static sound feel of my arm,
Removes itself from me,
Granting formerly unprecedented agency,
Between my brain and my limb,
With me left the unhappy powerless spectator
Oct 2018 · 362
Your stream of thought pleases naught,
And swirls your mouth in toilet style,
In twisted humors,
It spouts your bile through your smile,
Where we all wish it would not
Oct 2018 · 139
Meticulously making milestones,
Don’t chase me,
Dripping dropping side roads of thoughts,
My train is racing,
Until it is up end by life,
The beat and time I’ve worked for entirely,
Well I wrote to thank you,
And the pen times a thousand,
For although gilded words,
Glide on thoughts,
Of yours,
Of mine,
Of stars,
Of trees,
It would not be in physical,
Without the read’or’write’or’thee,
And sure, we moments are vein,
And admire ourselves each other without,
Are certainly good for the ego too.
Oct 2018 · 137
Writing is very cathartic for me,
In the same way,
Bleeding is cathartic for plague treatment.
After drenching a page,
I sit,
Corpse-still, Catholic cathedral still,
Echoing off my abandoned adorned walls.
Oct 2018 · 157
Sound, In sight
Vibrant Vectors,
Bounce Buoyantly,
From castle top,
To dungeon dark,
Their Technicolor angles,
Make angels’,
Wings which,
Provide unique views,
Of the Kusama colored,
Blinking barking lights.
Leave your treasures,
Forget to listen,
To all of your peers and their sayings,
Your cash can’t help you here,

Killing lies,
Till death do us apart,
Killing lies,
No care can be too much,

A field of lies,
Truth mines,
A tragedy,
Serine oblivion,
Pure bubbles of treachery,

Killing lies,
Tonight won’t end ever,
Killing lies,
Get “A”s you’ll do well in life,

Death in jubilation
Of truth’s explanation
Listen to, "Killing Lies" by The Strokes.
Oct 2018 · 111
Eureka Duo (Part Two)
Marvelous mysterious moments,
When your Mad Max brain,
Can’t open the intake valves of your nostrils,
Far enough to **** up enough oxygen,
To fuel your head fast enough
To process your thoughts,
Well enough to reach
Your, “Eek’ah!”
Oct 2018 · 263
Eureka Duo (Part One)
I don’t take philosophy courses,
Not because I’m smarter and always right,
But because I’m jaded,
I know each person in our
Lewis & Clark exploration through what we think is ours,
Comes to moments of great clearing clarity,
Of unlocking more parts of our mind,
New abilities like a videogame,
For which I cannot hate,
Or love,
More or less,
For to find myself,
The greatest of mysteries solved, what joy!
I cannot know myself,
The worst of betrayals, what sorrow!
But seeing as I’m the most central force,
In only this galaxy and the next,
I cannot afford the time for you,
To go through this too.
Nothing quite captures the, “college feel”
As running,
Almost but not quite,
Late to class,
Several photocopied book pages,
Handed out by the professor yesterday,
Tucked in a w shape,
Around your, my, middle ring and pointed pointer finger,
The dark crevasse made by spine height,
Etches a deep rift in the center of a work,
Or a piece,
Or a section,
Making readers take running jumps,
Hands and feet forward,
In order to reach the other side,
With some,
Falling ****** Tunes,
Into the dark lofty abyss.
Oct 2018 · 158
Fills you up with carrion,
And leaves you to marinate,
Merely Marionetting movements,
Jerky and unfamiliar with the phlegm thick,
Cement heavy,
Consistency of your limbs,
Tires you out,
Until you sit a screen zombie,
Having your scalp pulled back and skull
Like a jaw breaker
Oct 2018 · 124
I resent many of my own works,
And I resent having to write them,
Such dreary ****.
But It’s what I feel and my hand writes,
As a suicidal turtle,
Though may place his head underneath an elephant’s foot,
Cannot stop himself from pulling back under his shell.
Oct 2018 · 296
I don’t want to be a, “Good Person”
Or rather,
Not if you have to tell me,
I’d rather die,
Then hear someone tell me I’m nice,
You’re so nice,
You’re a good guy,
Gratefully with twinges of gluttonous ego I accept,
In spite of myself,
Perhaps I’ve been groomed to act,
Act nice to be complimented,
Act as a good artisan to appease all.

Humans never cease to appall me,
With ways to be unwarrantedly wareful,
And secretly subconsciously submergent,
So I remain watchful of myself.
Oct 2018 · 169
How inconsiderate of that plane,
Surely in the air for much longer than I’ve been sat here,
To interrupt the dusk of musical mirth and majesty,
Though I am just one of what has to be thousands,
To come listen to Yoyo Ma,
Or Bach,
Depending on your view,
And just one of hundred to picnic on the open air amphitheater lawn,
It does not feel as if it is just I,
For the phone, child, cough, crinkle, always remind me that it is not,
It seems we are simply here to chance a view into the earth’s song of love to the sky,
And the sky paints in ample gradient blue peach white,
The infinite intricate care and joy it feels,
To chance a glance upon the ground
Oct 2018 · 167
I’m ready to have my heart broken today,
Though perhaps this is simply the impact,
Of the slow-mo hammer that’s been coming
Since the Rube Goldberg machine of life started,

Not so long ago

The sun bolstered my confidence by,
Hiding behind morose bloated clouds.
Yellow bellied good for nothin’…

I’m ready to have my heart broken today,
My flippant flying exterior trying to calm
My Red October sinking sub soul,
But I refuse to treat her as evil,
Or lesser,
Or ******.

Granted she’s breaking my heart,
But I think humanity is worth more,
Than a few selfish tears,
Than a couple wasted years,
At least in the concrete.

Aristotle may topple and turn in his grave,
Plato may hate me and ask to debate me,
But I’ll laugh and turn away.

And now I’ve digressed
Just to distract

That my heart is being broken today
Oct 2018 · 101
My chest hurts,
And I feel like a *****,
I want to complain and sulk,
And other people make me wince,
And I thought I should be grown,
And I thought I shouldn’t care,
And I thought I’d made up my mind,
And I think I want to die.
But then again,
I’ve thought, felt,
Times before.
Oct 2018 · 108
A Doctors Visit
Hey there Frank

How’s it goin’ John?

Well I think I’ve left this
Thing on my chest too long

Well let me see,
Well look at that!
Turns out you’re gay!

Do you want to get

Frank had a laugh and
then continued
Why its just a crush,
I thought you knew?

Well yes I know
But lookey here
Its gone and festered
And spread o’re theer

What’s that, are you,
Southern now, or is it
Just a side effect of
A new woman found?

No I’m just playing
I don’t like how
Quickly this has spread
Especially so soon after
My last relationship’s dead

Well you’re right that part
Is slightly concerning…
Here take two of these
And call me in the morning

What are these



No, just a cold shower and
Night of introspectiveness.
That should root out any
Rebound infections

Then as usual go to max
For his reflections?

As always. I just talked with him, you remember
Ms. Parker

Our old 5th grade teacher?
How could I forget!

Well she’s just been named

No ****!

No seriously she got
The promotion

Oh I’m glad she
Was such a good teacher

And just think, just
Nine years after
We were with her

Yea well, we are
Getting up there in years

Oh shut the **** up
We’re still we behind the ears

Alright well take care
Bud ill see you
Over break

Totally man we can play some games

A Second Opinion

Hey there John

How’s it goin’ Max?

Not bad, I just got
Referred here by Cerny

Ah, I just talked to him

That’s what he told me

Well I heard you’ve
Something of an infection

Yes, but not the good

Thanks for that distinction

Frank said it was a crush

Well that’s what he told me but my festering state aint too pretty

Well I’ll take a look although
He’s probably right
John’s got another crush what A stud

Alright alright enough, here it is,
Tell me doc, is it rough?

Well, do you want the good
News first or last


You’ve certainly got

Oh God

For a girl

Please don’t

Is she cute?

Of course you dolt!
And kind and god fearing too
Yet I don’t want to rush

Who’d want to? Just enjoy
Yourself and don’t be a
****, use protection


That’s the spirit!

When are you coming
back? We haven’t talked in ages

Around spring but I
Forget the dates

Well call or ill find
And **** you

I wouldn’t expect anything less.
Aug 2018 · 229
Subconscious Racism
I’m grappling with this amorphous *******,
Whose refusal to come out and fight,
Come out and fight,
Come out and fight,
Yet deal me black eyes and gut clenchers,
Like a Vegas card shark leaves me,
Flailing against an enemy,
I estranged, doesn’t play by any rules I know,
He she it strikes whenever I don’t expect,
Stalking me in my room,
Listening to music,
Watching a movie,
Reading a book,
Talking to friends,
My friends, no worse for not warning me of the oncoming onslaught,
They are fighting have fought will fight or wont,
Regardless most if not all are as,
Hopelessly blind as myself,
And sometimes you resign to the beatings,
Just let them come,
But that’s not always defeat,
Everyone gets tired,
No one can fight all the time,
But don’t fall complacent or retreat,
To societies’ low standards,
We must keep on
Especially my kind
I must keep on
Keep on
Keep on
Aug 2018 · 1.6k
Despite myself I find myself,
Thinking about you again,
You don’t make sense to me,
But the rhythm of your thoughts are predictable now,
Someday will never come,
And my dear,
Someday we'll be together again,
Perhaps I say that just to leave you happy,
To leave you in power,
Because I can sustain most damage,
Or at least I've yet to meet my maker,
And maybe then I can play the victim,
And maybe then that means I think you are fragile,
And maybe then I'm a cowered,
And maybe then I’m a sexist,
But I can’t control why or what,
With you
With you,
Not again

It’s time I accept the past as valid
Accept the past happened,
Accept it was real,
And move on.
Jellyfish clouds in drift,
Their invisible tendrils,
Zappin’ an trapin’ air,
Leaving the sedentary dead weight,
Directly on my shoulders.
The nostalgic Sahara heat,
Travels through time and space to Ohio,
Where a younger me swam in the,
Not actually cold but cooler pool.
Ten years but two seconds later,
I work there, Date there, Talk there, and eventually
Leave there
Aug 2018 · 176
Dinner in Lakewood
The dinner din of a hip open-air restaurant mixes with the judging whispers of the serving staff,
The smell of arid red wine filtering through the winter window pain air,

One tanned-over brick wall accents the grey spackled background walls,
The gold platted ceiling tantalizing our peripherals,

The light beach wood floors subvert our attention from the dark, painted black, oak chairs

Portions of food designed to satisfy, not over stuff, guests glide out with mysterious but pleasing quickness,

Not too full but an obviously profitable night with diners and servers leaving, with full stomachs and pockets respectively,

Each believing they got the better deal
Aug 2018 · 218
Trying to tap telegrams
On the back of my phone
In a faux leather seat
In the back of my mothers car.
Anyone will tell you I have a
For the contrary
And there’s strangely no argument,
Where I got it from,
The seatbelt sits uncomfortably across my throat,
Stopping my words,
A space formerly only occupied by her gaze,
Though my future career may benefit,
My current psyche does not.
Jun 2018 · 177
Sitting next to a girl as unknown and distant as Poe’s old wife,
The elegant back road curves of her figure as alluring as the self-guided blade which slew Edger,
His and her place of origin the same, some backwater country side in Pennsylvania,
Her hardened wit to rival his devotion to church,
Hands closer to soft affection than Poe’s intimacy with other men,
And though I scarcely believe our mutual affection,
It is still as surprising as Poe’s dark complexion
Jun 2018 · 232
I liked to spring forth from the bushes
Trying to catch my 2009 year old friend mid March

The burning heat as firewood’s crackling,
Glowing heart erupted from my knees as my own
Feet had fought each other to which was going to be placed

Seeing red white and blue the Final chalk
Me up as scraped with fireworks of every decibel explodes in

My head

Its back backed by the drum beat of a song we cant ever remember
But will never forget

Of the “Its alright there’s no need to cry” times,
“Your purple penguin plate needed a new friend anyway”

As tears are mopped up by the already wet nose,
Of our best friend, I remiss, then go to grab
My old new cup
For the young me of memories
Jun 2018 · 398
I knew the first swallow of vinegar salt-water memory
Would not leave me in peace
But awaken my wolf’s hunger
For life

Which leaves me yelling screaming,
Thrashing my boots, khakis, coat,
Sweater, watch,
Suddenly immersed in the pure sapphire blue,
Of tranquil but choking waters of remembrance

Coffee shops, Like brains,
Mock the idea of ridged conformity

People of all shapes and sizes
All makes and models
All styles and varieties
Wander through looking for single refreshment
The background weight of memories caught in my coat
Pull me down until I’m sputtering, splashing,
Then drowning
In the pool of days past

But no day as no person in need of quenching
Stops for long
Each just here to slow down my day
Just here to do me death by a thousand charms
Treacherous tenacity of “what if” at the counter
Tears a hole inside my heart
Of which in love or hate has left a scar
Jun 2018 · 179
****, I’ve been high since,
I was a kid,

I get lofty and light,
With the rest of them,

Granted my high was that due to elevation
And not escapism,

The Beech is the best place to go on a summer’s day

The weather like a warm blanket begs you to stay outside,

The branches crisscross across the sky,
Saving me from any toss,
Letting me think thoughts,
Of rushing from aerie heights,

I bend with The Beech,
And its soft coarse bows,
Match the gentle Maternal caress of the sweet summer breeze,
Beckon me into natural,
Seats, grown just for me,
As I have grown to be worthy of it

The clouds
Gentle behemoths
Meander beyond boundaries,
But never lose their lackadaisical luxuriousness

They’ve informed me
Today is the day for,
A climb,

I spider up the trunk and branches,
More mother’s ladder to father’s rays,
Even at the slight height,
I feel his tender gaze,
And embrace,
Protecting me from the ludicrous idea of failing,
Jun 2018 · 165
A flash of unripe banana green hair,
And the solemn padding of thumbs hitting a screen,
The wisp’s of dying flame,
A worn sticker on a pure evening blue water bottle,
The tight warm grip,
Of a beanie on my head,
The soft wind that air vents disperse,
The crisp smell of a sparse winter’s day,
Like wasabi, but clogging my nose instead of cleaning it,
The din of speaking and eating in a popular coffee shop,
And I’m just on my way to class
I’ve always been told that I have a nice nose,
So Andrew’s kind words graced my back
As the rays of light from the sun
Those rays so warming, free me each morning from the

Quivering fingers inside your throat choking
Moist clammy tongue caressing your neck
Tearing your toes apart
That father darkness always gifts

Sweetly, softly, kindly
To me

In my own
Quickening of heart shaking of limbs screaming silenced search of eyes

Ive overlooked one thing

The silly sleepy fluffy tail of my best friend
And my folly in footwork leaves him whimpering
And me begging forgiveness prostrated
The likes of which were never seen by my ex.
Mar 2018 · 206
A tri fold, then a bi fold, then a bi fold again
The smooth ridged friction causes my fingers to stumble,
Over the inscribed words of duty, honor, and justice
Though my marks cover the blank space
The core message stands resolute

Through the bite marks when I’ve no hands
Through the creases of each fold
Through the crossed out notes of yesterdays and before

The ideals stand unwavering on the rock of unassailable surety

“that’s not right” “its not what we do” my ingrained and flawless surety
Of right and wrong often splashed on my friends
Regardless of then asking to be soaked
They knew that this was coming
They knew ever since they became friends with me

I stood as bright and shinning as any statue to some ethical boundary
Completely unashamed of my brilliant and righteous judgment

Though still toeing the edge of my seat, I am quiet.
I’ve learned to let them do as they please,
Leave the bowing of others
To the truly untainted teachings
Of wisdom
To wisdom
Mar 2018 · 239
The thirsty throat of my thought never lets me think
It swallows up each idea into the dead mass of depression
Selecting what joys to **** dry each day
Headaches and hangovers help me forget my forgetfulness
The remiss panic attacks assist my fugue state
Then my own failure and impending irrelevance does me the honor
Of piercing the center of my skull like a rhino's horn
Grateful I feed it my fears and futilely fake freedom for my family
They can’t know, they have problems I know, I wont let it show,
Friends, whether fake or “for real” worry for me,
Im not some sappy sonofabitch looking for sorrow
Just wake me when I’m already late and disappointing you tomorrow
Mar 2018 · 195
“I hope you know you are constantly in my thoughts and prayers”
I hope to help keep you from the devil’s lair,

Oh im sure that mega churches are the refugee’s delight
Wouldn’t want your holy coin to stray out of Gods bounded sight

And the woman who has none to give for she barely makes a living?
You’d chastise her for posting support rather than giving

Ah yes just as the Bible says, give until it’s inconvenient, that’s Mark 12:41 I believe
“Love thy neighbor as you would, but don’t try to change policy yourself”

So either I give or be ****** to your lofty righteous judgment?
I forgot that your pious words were backed by your own funding allotment
I’m glad you aren’t just someone looking for a hyperbolic fight,
But are too doing everything you can think to help every night*

Dear God thank you for these people keeping us in check,
In truth, and in jest, for without those who do nothing the ones who do something wouldn’t be anywhere yet.
The first line is a quote from MLK Jr.
Feb 2018 · 270
A free portrait! Imagine that,
At no charge this troglodyte
Decided that I deserved a rendition in pulsing crimson, me!
He effortlessly sliced the curve of my face,
And then holding true to brute form,
Let his fists do the rest of the painting.
In a breath’s thought I fought the idea
That this strong browed man was a fan of
Yves klein, but then he caringly guided my sight
Floor-bound and I noticed that he was a
Monochromatic *******.

Now, I wasn’t expecting Monet,
But in truth the elegance of the lazy red river
Careening down my cheek and neck got my hopes up.

And then further was impressed by his liberalness
With bottomless black crimson
Where he’d only previously flirt with young pinot noir
As he took a break to wash and massage his stained hands
I clutched at the hope that perhaps he was done with the
Onslaught with such blunt tools,
As such methods could ruin the whole piece
Unfortunately, he returned
And his care for each swipe was becoming more

More impassioned, but less precise,
I asked if he perhaps needed a second break?
Perhaps I could assist him,
I wanted to give it a try myself, but my hands were

In vain,
I tried to tell him that,
His bearish skills and appearance,
Would be better suited to a life of leather, whips, and Oedipus Complexes,
But his response was,

You should never laugh at an artist
Especially the bad ones
Because then their work some how finds a way to get worse

I asked if he’d learned how to work from his father,
And whether his father had worked him in any
Manner, and that’s when I became dizzy
I think.
Apparently struck a nerve.
Jan 2018 · 356
A blank page intimidates the weak, but not you or me,
They have it all wrong you see,
They’re so concerned, they think they need to write,
Don’t worry you and I can set them right,
We can’t write at all, our pens don’t actually use ink
We could just as well use sticks, “They’ve finely gone crazy!” They’d think,
Well, sure that part could still be true,

But it’d work because, as you know too,
We aren’t writing but discovering what words,
Were already written though maybe unheard,
We are not so lofty as to think we have some knowledge to preach,
We simply are taking notes in the class which life continues to teach
Jan 2018 · 207
When you’re depressed, you have to take yourself by surprise,
Whether it’s to sleep or eat or rise,
Cause if you think on it for too long,
You’ll convince yourself that you’re wrong,
That the effort is not worth the reward,
Even when your body and brain are sure,
That it’s too much to open a bag of chips,
Or if not that then to raise them to your lips,
Talking to people takes too much thought,
And whatever they want you to be you’re not,
And you can’t **** yourself that’d be too sad,
So you sit glassy eyed at whatever you have,
But the doc told me that I wasn’t, so,
I’m glad that I don’t have depression I’m just feeling low
Jan 2018 · 254
I want to rhyme,
As a snake wants to lie,
With such antiquated works as The Creation of Man,
Somehow, once perceived beautiful, should line bedpans,
If I go out and see a stream,
And hear its babbling in my dreams,
Soon becomes shouting abrasive noise,
And now, with age, I hope to never hear its voice,
The Evil Birds and their hellish songs,
May consul mere children, but me no long’,
For I have matured past such childish delight,
And would shudder to hear a robin in flight,
And no matter how well a work may seem produced,
This outdated refuse I refuse to be seduced.
Jan 2018 · 301
All I
      On a
    C h a i r  

Hung   in   space

Tranquil Peace


    In the air

Then a
A slight
     From the

And my, me, myself, I,
On the floor, ego dead.
Jan 2018 · 355
Glorified Metronome
I don’t have anything against them flailing about,
With their commanding stare and whisper shouts,
Don’t get me wrong it’s not an easy job,
To keep all in time with a clean kebab,
And I don’t think I could keep a civil look when an oboe’s flat.

I think that’s when my brain would crack,
Just as when you break a twig,
First you feel the wood bend and give,
Then Crack! Like stubbing your toe,
Sudden pain and yelling, I’ve thrown my shoe at the tone deaf Oboe
Dec 2017 · 327
I Drink! I Toast!
To the forgotten poems!
Dead for all not to see,
Unless your heart's romantic,
In which case they are free,

Roam my mind you unchained moments!
And flee my capture you Germans from Romans!

To the hunt! The contest! The chase we all endure!
For every one I’m able to express, may one hundred elude me!
Dec 2017 · 191
I try to cry but reality shows my fears,
As though i try i can find no tears.
Dec 2017 · 187
You look me in the eye, and slowly turn the knife,
And im sure you have the best intentions to antagonize my life,
You throw the knife and use your hand terror in your eyes,
For you cant see your tries to help, is what makes me want to die
Dec 2017 · 169
Or perhaps death wouldn't be that bad,
At least it would save my soul from feelings had,
Or just one day ill wander off,
No trace left behind no strip of cloth,

The death i currently face is full of pain
As i watch my blood pool into the drain,
The sword in my chest protrudes out the other side,
As I wheeze along pain in each stride,
And though ill greet each face and spurt a lie,
I know at the end of the day ill face the pain I hide.

One day.
One time.
Some reason.
Some rhyme.

Or at least i hope. as none can see what is ahead,
But that fades from my view as I keep pleading to be dead.

And what a deep man am I? always boasting of great inner strife?
Oh so troubled by evil what a pondering man who leads such a life!
I cannot feel but as the last leaf to fall.
Alone, afraid, and none to call

Dec 2017 · 171
I stretch my fingers as far as I can,
To try and rip them from my hand,
My blackened skin crumbling off before me,
So it would not tear but simply decomposing,
I'm use to the feeling of this husk growing lean,
As I watch it turn red, to sage, to aubergine,

Disjoined ill finish my inspection
In a few days i wont have any recollection,
Just another day to live in private infamy,
Of divining my death which one day will take me,
Though hopefully ill use up my fear 'fore that hour,
Terror today, for peaceful final encounters.
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