The thirsty throat of my thought never lets me think
It swallows up each idea into the dead mass of depression
Selecting what joys to suck dry each day
Headaches and hangovers help me forget my forgetfulness
The remiss panic attacks assist my fugue state
Then my own failure and impending irrelevance does me the honor
Of piercing the center of my skull like a rhino's horn
Grateful I feed it my fears and futilely fake freedom for my family
They can’t know, they have problems I know, I wont let it show,
Friends, whether fake or “for real” worry for me,
Im not some sappy sonofabitch looking for sorrow
Just wake me when I’m already late and disappointing you tomorrow
Nimbus Mar 12
I can no longer hide
My soul ignited

once disparaged
I long to share it

The chills in my spine put into words

Lips on skin
Eyes filled with sin

What is this sensation

I drip colors you cannot see

Heightening my passion
Enhancing my touch

Raw emotion channeled as such

My desire aches
The color of flush
My cage breaks
Expressions of lust

I do not fear it
I can hear you blush

My favorite sound

Our souls combust
My restless soul longs for something fulfilling
Midnight Mar 7
The funny thing is...
I laugh in the shadows
And scheme in the light*
I lurk in the depths
And cry when I stumble.
I walk through the fields
And scream when I'm fine.

I tantalize the men
And shrink when they pounce.
I flirt with the ladies
But disappear when they come.

I beg lovers to change
But complain when they try.
I seek out the demons
And lead the angels astray.

I can't seem to decide
To choose the good over bad.
But I sure can complain
And I sure cannot change.

It's getting annoying
My heart pays the price.
But I'm still dancing with devils
And there's no end in sight.
Whatever is wrong with me.
Kathleen M Mar 1
I am a lake
I am full of turmoil and water
There is thick mud at the bottom
All kinds of things get stuck
There are bodies buried inside me
My chest is full of corpses
I ripple with every disturance
Surface tension broken by those who do not lightly tread
I tend to overflow I tend to spread the bog
Seema Feb 19
Tempest triumph turmoil tomb
Seeketh life or seeketh whom
Ashes, bones lay beneath me
Humble yourself, so you can see
A wide range of locus holograms
Pinched around like metal prams
Escape none to route a way
Knuckles grit, sinking everyday
Dark puffed, stuffed grey matter
Auction solidarity is no better
Speech of silence, clouds of rain
Piercing pledging pleading pain
Thy grace, I praise as heavens open
Not above but a voice has spoken
Walk the steps downs, the voices called
Come to us, you belong to our world
Pushed dragged and pulled a few miles
Clowned faces, greet with smiles
Mummified shrouds hang like dolls
Eyes spring out like the tennis balls
Dredged with stinkful skillful spills
Rainbow colored infinite pills
Wide-eyed blinks match the flurocent
Contour light lights up the magnificent
Bridges burn birthing ashes
Torn ripped dirty worn sashes
Two hands praying, Lord save our nation
Two legs walk, it's another fashion
Rotten forgotten the limpage lives
All hands stuck in the money hives
Online tariff tragic traffic terror
Highlights viral vital error
Known unknown captured in doubts
Strapped bodies spillage by mouths
Shots of needles through my veins
End of life, foregone with pains!

Spilling thoughts.
A Jan 19
With broken wings and body I fly,
It's all I can do, so I try,
The simple words I cannot say
Have taken all my lives away.

Even if my heart shall break,
And all my loves I shall forsake,
I cannot help but be betrayed
By the love yet unpaid.

So to myself, I keep this trial,
Through suppression and denial,
And with it, I start to shatter,
But you don't know me

So it doesn't matter.
to treat you with anything other than the utmost kindness and love
is, in my eyes
the worst thing i could possibly do

i lash out at you in my mind
in speech it translates into slight annoyance
and even this is unacceptable

i walk on my own eggshells
i police my thoughts and language
if i say anything to hurt you i repeat it tenfold to myself

my dreams betray me
my thoughts betray me
you would never do such a thing to me

my thoughts of you
how dare they sour?
do i not realize how important you are to me?

my dreams of someone else
how dare they continue?
do i not realize how important you are to me?

the anger rises
not in you, but in myself
though it slips out of every crack that i can't cover

i don't deserve you
i don't deserve you
i don't deserve you

i want to hold you until my arms hurt
i want to protect you until you decide
i want to be with you forever

i want that to be enough
I think ive strangled him, and left him dead,
The second one inside my head,
The fool romantic, the Rosey dense,
From with in me he use to come hense,
But no longer, I've smoked him out,
And crushed his neck I've ended his rout,

This flight, his dodge from my iron foot,
Ends today the point's now moot,
For even if pity, i saw in his eye,
For something as his hands let him die,
I shall not ponder what it meant,
For I, the rational have won and he has went
Kiarra Dean Dec 2017
"What are you?" might be asked
But no one will ever know
For if I trust you enough
My love for you will grow
Because, I live in the sea
Something that must not show
So I dress up in a gown and mask
Letting the sea breeze blow
Yet, you never came my love
So I shall let my secret go
Into the sea I jump
As you walk down the path to me
Watching as I flash before your eyes
Becoming oh so free
Running, screaming you call my name
But I cannot hear--how far down must I be?
That day, I lost a lover to land
And she, her love to sea
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