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I've my peeves
and things I just don't like
like your puppies poop
on my shoe, morning, noon, or night

So when you've had all your days
and think you're heaven bound
remember all the crap you left
as justice comes, around

Moving toward that day, just ahead
I can only pray and hope
when you're in the hell hotel
you've only fresh doggie poop
for soap

(Slippery, and gooey, on a silken, golden rope)
It doesn't matter the size or breed of the dog, it's the owners that need to be punished, I think this poem is good solution ;D
Arrrh, here we be again
at "Talk like a Pirate day"
we'll spew our gaffs and have some laughs
slappin wenches bums, while we're at play

We'll have some grog
mockin the captain's log
reading lines of sea bound times
and cabin boys, he's flogged

When the eve be ov'r
and drunken we'll awake
it's out to sea, we'll all be
nursing our headache

Our love for wenches stowed
miseries bandon'd in the hold
mainsail's set, we'll not ferget
we be pirates, young and old
Yup, had to do it, it's like maritime law! ;D
Last years poem:
Elon Musk and I have a lot in common, in fact we could be cerebral twins, we are both rich, we are both geniuses, we are both insane, well him 1/2 me fully and we have both sent objects into space. he sent a car, I sent my ex up there. Ok actually what I did was, tie a bunch of helium balloons around her neck and up she went. I assume she made it. She's probably driving around up there in Elon's car and laughing all the way to the moon bank, not having to use any fuel up there. Thanks Elon. Next time hand me a call, I would have asked you to send a donkey up there, not that car.

more random thoughts


Insanity, its not as crazy as you may think!

Insanity, its a lot more fun than you may think!

Insanity, where crazy is the new normal!

Insanity, join now and get a free white jacket!!

Insanity, a great way to get away with murder!

Insanity, a pathway to the Whitehouse!
( spell check suggests Whorehouse, ummmmm)

Insanity, although some call it marriage!
Dear Moon
How many men fit inside
a commom four man tent?
I can't make this up, true dat my friends! :(
Wow, and then, he asked what a sleeping bag was!
Maya 2d
the sun will die
but not for a long time
not before our own infinities
collapse into the absurdity and
the unimportance of it

the sun will die
but not before goodwill
closes its doors one last time.
so long shitty $1 books and
memories of old people couches
that smelled like piss and beer and your great-grandfather's

yeah, the sun will die
but not before those
kids who used to pick on you
and that bastard on the train
who got kicked in the balls for making lewd comments in the quiet car
become worm food for
more decent creatures.

the sun will fucking die
so be glad.
everything ends including
all us bastards,
us heavy breathers and
old ladies and ex-cons and alcoholics and plain humans.

the sun will die
but we got other things to worry about
more relative than all the others
so we may as well
You broke my heart when you stole and used my bride.
She ran off with you and I'm going to take it out of your hide.
I'm going to knock out your teeth when I give you a beating.
You will have to gum your food to be able to continue eating.
You soon dumped my wife because to you, she was just a booty call.
I just punched you in the face and it gives me pleasure to see you fall.
You just got up off the floor but I just knocked you down again.
My wife meant nothing to you, you give a bad name to men.
You told her that you loved her but you lied.
She was so upset that she committed suicide.
Convincing her to leave me was mean but using her was meaner.
I just pulled out my 44 Magnum pistol and blew off your wiener.
I can't let you continue to be a jerk, I can't allow that at all.
I have made sure that my late wife will be your last booty call.
People don't like me because I make terrible moonshine.
Nobody in their right mind wants this whiskey of mine.
I've received a lot of angry phone calls, and some pretty nasty letters.
People say that when it comes to my shine, horse piss tastes better.
A city slicker actually called my moonshine slop.
He felt he'd been ripped off so he called the cops.
The police arrested him too for buying the moonshine in the first place.
His stupidity got him jail time, you should've seen the look on his face.
My shine is so terrible that the Surgeon General has started putting a warning label on every bottle.
If you drink my 130 proof moonshine, you won't walk straight for days, when you walk, you will waddle.
My shine will knock your head off, it's sure not as mild as a malt.
I've warned you about my shine so if it makes you go blind, it will be your fault.
Be patient
be very very patient
after that
add more patience
then wait
and wait
and wait and wait and wait
become a waiter
at least you will be paid to wait

When she finally finally arrives
give her the biggest smile you possibly possess
tell her, "Hello love, you are early and
looking very majestically beautiful my sweet!
what have you done to your hair love?"
since you have waited a century or two or three
it's a safe gamble she has, and you my friend
will be a big winner.

Therefore when you wait and wait and wait
be a winner
even skeletons
Someone and I am not naming names is late to show up in chat!
Madison Sep 11
She's an anarchist

But she still follows the rules

Of writing haiku.
Her name was Cné, Lizzy, Santita, Tangerine
she told me she was new in town, fresh upon, the scene
we danced the tango, mamba
we loved in the horizontal thunda
and I know she was in splendor, the moment that, she creamed
;D ya had to be there....
Agnetha Fältskog and Anni-Frid Lyngstad were hot stuff in my day LOL!
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